THE LAST SUPPER: Onwards.
The last supper was really very similar to or the same thing as the Essenic brotherly meal. It also coincided with Pesach or Passover in Jesus’s time, so adding significant meaning.
It was a sharing a breaking of bread and wine or more likely, non alcoholic must.
The words that Jesus spoke saying that this is my body and this is my blood, meant something other than a literal translation. He was talking as the Universal and indicating that everything was God and there wasn’t anything but God. This was his last teaching before the crucifixion, that all is One, we are all One with God. ‘Peace be with you’, which Jesus used was an Essenic expression. The bread and wine were used as emblems, of the ultimate truth, so that the ritual would be continued, as it is today in The Mass. There is much symbolism with the Essenes for they were into The Kabbalah and Prophecy.
Another important ceremony at the supper was the washing of the apostle’s feet. In India this is called Padanamaskar or Worship of the Feet. It is to show that one isn’t above anyone else and that the same God dwells within all of us. So we can worship God in anything even another human being. Peter at first refused to allow Jesus to wash his feet, and Jesus told him, 'He that would be the greatest would be servant of all.'
THE CRUCIFIXION:
Without going into the ‘Passion’, let us look at the words of Jesus on the cross. The most important were spoken at the end, where he cried out ‘ My God, My God, why have thou forsaken me’. From a Vedantic standpoint this sounds very much like the dying ego. As the ego dies there is much fear, and this is reflected in Jesus’s feeling of abandonment. The ego doesn’t want to die, it wants to preserve itself even on the other higher planes, sometimes it will attempt to escape to another type of body rather than die. So here we have Jesus experiencing the entire feeling of all human souls for their separation from their source. This empty abandoned plane, that has to be fought through when abandoning identity. It was the ego crying out not to be abandoned.
Yeshua’s words, ‘It is finished’, are not strictly about his death but about the end of the battle. The ego is finished, and Yeshua’s soul has realized its identity with the Universal, it has merged and dropped all illusion of separation. In Vedanta this is called Videha Mukti or Liberation at the death of the body.
RESURRECTION:
This is the revitalizing of the body, rebuilding it and energizing it. Yeshua’s mission, if you will was to show that there was no death, and this was programmed into his karma for this lifetime. So on his death and Moksha the body still had some time to function in the world. There was programmed karma to play out that is. However the consciousness is no longer that of Yeshua but the Universal.
Death in itself is a very relative term, for many yogis can go into samadhi or trance, and the body seems to have no vital signs. One has to appreciate the manifestation of consciousness to understand this. In Vedanta it is posited that we have three bodies, the gross material, the subtle and the causal, and these have to be purified.
Purification of the Buddhi, or the individualised version of the Universal Mind/Mahat, is necessary for spiritual progress. The Buddhi is an aspect of the Vijnanamayakosha or Awareness Sheath, it is the Inner Mind/Intellect or Antahkarana. When it is turned inwards it pierces through Maya and leads to Moksha or Liberation. When it is turned outward it only succeeds in enhancing the power of the Lower Mind or Manamayakosha. This part of the mind is turned out to desires and satisfaction of the senses. A Buddhi turned outwards is a distortion of its 'function. For man can manipulate his mind to enjoy the senses, out of season, so to speak. Unlike the animal, which only operates instinctively within its' Dharma.
I will briefly talk about the five koshas and how this purification process works. It is a reversal of consciousness as we know it, to its' "Natural" State. The five koshas are the ANNAMAYA, PRANAMAYA, MANOMAYA, VIJNANAMAYA, and ANANDAMAYA KOSHAS. THAT IS THE FOOD, ENERGY, MIND, AWARENESS OR INTELLECTUAL, and BLISS OR CAUSAL SHEATHS.
The gross material body is the food sheath, the subtle is made up of the energy, mind and intellectual sheaths, and finally the third body is the causal or bliss sheath. The subtle is withdrawn at death, and dwells on the subtle planes at different levels. This also occurs in meditation and sleep. The conscious mind is dropped in favour of the subconscious mind. There is a second death where the energy and lower mind sheath are left behind. This sheath looks like the physical body one used in life.
There are three states of consciousness, Waking, Dreaming and Deep Sleep, and when we are asleep we leave the gross physical body behind and its waking state. Sometimes this happens otherwise and is called an ‘Out of Body’, experience. Death is when the sheaths no longer go back into the body, the connection is broken. With Jesus this didn’t happen for as the individual ego died the Universal Consciousness took over the body and its residual karma. So we have Jesus dying and ‘The Christ’, rising.
THE ASCENSION:
The Ascension can be looked at in different ways. Obviously rising and floating up to ‘Heaven’, is figurative for Heaven is within. So what happened at the Ascension? Jesus probably did rise above the ground to give the disciples a better view. At this point he disintegrated the body into its natural constituents and it disappeared.
The other alternative is that it was only a projected body and the normal body of Jesus the Christ was somewhere else on the planet, playing out residual programmed karma. Some say that Jesus returned to India and the body didn’t drop until he was very old, and there is a lot of hypothesis concerning this.
Whichever theory one prefers, it doesn’t take anything away from the message of Yeshua the man who became The Christ Spirit. The word Christ is the Greek word for Messiah. There is another word used by some early Christian groups and that is Chrestus which means ‘Perfected One’. In actuality they both mean the same thing, as a Perfected Master becomes one with the Christ Spirit, or Caitanya Kuthasta in Sanskrit. It is also not dissimilar to the Hindu Shakti, or Universal Energy, or even the Shekinah in Kabbalistic Judaism.(Jesus who became the Christ..took birth from the Brahmaloka he was mostly in Nirvikalpa samadhi but not completely in Sahaja..so there was a residual ego he used to take a non causal birth. It is likely he was on the Bhakti path before that..Ramana reflects the minds of the questioner so he probably didn't want to offend Chadwick.that is why he said 'might'. Also he may have thought that Chadwick may not have understood the process of the final killing of the ego..in this case the bhakti ego of Jesus...A death process has to happen with all moksha...Jesus happened to be on the cross, in more painful circumstances.....he cried out for he was losing his bhakti to moksha otherwise he would have to go back to brahmaloka consciousness).
Friday, November 05, 2010
Saturday, September 04, 2010
Dump everything, ideas religion, helping etc...........just realise the I Am.Humanness is futility.
Dump everything, ideas religion, helping etc...........just realise the I Am.Humanness is futility.
by Tony O'Clery on Saturday, September 4, 2010 at 11:40am
Humanity has not moved in a million years, except for projecting the mind on to more and more baubles and ideas...People took the fact of inter-dimensionals/spirits within illusion and turned them into a control sport called religion and ideology....One cannot get out of illusion by playing with it ....it is like playing with fire.............Religion is unnecessary as is evidenced by the billions of people, especially in the West that have abandoned it as fairy tales, base superstition and manipulation...only in the less educated or unenlightened areas is religion strong...for people use it to bully other people and as method of self identification for the ego... " I wear a hat, or a gown, or a turban, I cut my hair, I don't cut my hair , and I am more important than you who, who live in the next cave....Religion is just tribalism as there is no Personal God...that is just superstition....we are all the energy....the prana and there is only prana and karma in this delusionary universe.
What passes for 99% of love is only emotional sentiment, attachment, and pollyanna egoism....Love is the base energy...of everything.
The only key to get out of this cave is resistance to harm or Ahimsa and Daya or compassion..for they lead to Oneness and moksha or liberation from all the futility that is called humanity.
The woman in the cave is closer to truth than we are..............she has less acoutrements or ideas polluting her mind.
Trying to look for conscious awareness and golden ages spreading is just illusion and cyclical...and local only. It is the great deceiver called Hope....the linear thinking....
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1307936/Early-man-butchered-ate-brains-children-everyday-diet.html
800,000 years separation is just a day in the life.....and distraction of the mind...
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5237462334704426156#
by Tony O'Clery on Saturday, September 4, 2010 at 11:40am
Humanity has not moved in a million years, except for projecting the mind on to more and more baubles and ideas...People took the fact of inter-dimensionals/spirits within illusion and turned them into a control sport called religion and ideology....One cannot get out of illusion by playing with it ....it is like playing with fire.............Religion is unnecessary as is evidenced by the billions of people, especially in the West that have abandoned it as fairy tales, base superstition and manipulation...only in the less educated or unenlightened areas is religion strong...for people use it to bully other people and as method of self identification for the ego... " I wear a hat, or a gown, or a turban, I cut my hair, I don't cut my hair , and I am more important than you who, who live in the next cave....Religion is just tribalism as there is no Personal God...that is just superstition....we are all the energy....the prana and there is only prana and karma in this delusionary universe.
What passes for 99% of love is only emotional sentiment, attachment, and pollyanna egoism....Love is the base energy...of everything.
The only key to get out of this cave is resistance to harm or Ahimsa and Daya or compassion..for they lead to Oneness and moksha or liberation from all the futility that is called humanity.
The woman in the cave is closer to truth than we are..............she has less acoutrements or ideas polluting her mind.
Trying to look for conscious awareness and golden ages spreading is just illusion and cyclical...and local only. It is the great deceiver called Hope....the linear thinking....
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1307936/Early-man-butchered-ate-brains-children-everyday-diet.html
800,000 years separation is just a day in the life.....and distraction of the mind...
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5237462334704426156#
Thursday, August 05, 2010
Legend of Ramayana
Ramayana Soundaryam
Soudaryam means beauty. What do we mean by beauty? When do we say that something is beautiful? To start with, when an object appeals to our eyes, we say it is beautiful. Beauty is that X-factor that makes us admire, that which makes the object to stand out from its surroundings, that which is esthetically appealing to our vision, that which seems to have a perfection, an order or a structure. For example, not many people can appreciate the modern art, where deeper thinking may be required to appreciate the message depicted by the artist – which has more appealing to the intellect than the mind. In contrast, a beautiful object appeals immediately to our emotions. Subsequently, we may also admire intellectually the creator of that beauty and appreciate the intelligence behind that creation. Soundaryam or beauty has immediate mental or emotional appreciation, as our experience shows. Beauty is that which melts our hearts and fills our heart with noble sentiments. For example, when we see the beautiful flower that is in full blossom with all its fragrance, which is radiating with the brilliant colors and textures, our vision gets arrested, at least for few seconds. In those moments of admiration, we forget the rest of the world, and we even forget ourselves since there is no other thought that arises, other than emotional identity with that beauty. The mind itself becomes silent, with no words to express or verbalize it – other than some meaningless mantras – Oh!, Wah!, or What a beauty!, etc. The intellect may step in later with some critical analysis involving comparisons and contrasts with the things that were seen in the past, with gradations in the scale of beauty, with a desire to own it, or to be proud of it if it is already owned, or to be jealous of the person who owns it . We do not understand what is satyam and jnaanam but we understand sundaram, beauty and ananda or joy associated with it; the total fulfillment even for few moments of joy in the vision of the beauty.
Thus, when there is a beauty, the mind is attracted to it. Hence attraction is the expression of soudaryam, that which is beautiful. The perfection or the order that exists in the object manifests as attraction towards it, which in turn invokes love and passion. This may degenerate later into the desire to posses the object. Before the desire arises, there is an emotional identity with the object of love, which is the object of attraction, which is the object of beauty. There is a saying that the beauty is in the eyes of beholder. Thus beauty causes attraction and expresses as love for the object; and that love involves an identity with oneself bridging the gap between the seer and the seen, at least for those moments. No words can reach to express that beauty, that love, that happiness. Every object of beauty is a creative expression or vibhuuti of the creator, the supreme.
At the sense level of perception, a thing of beauty is seen through the order in the created object, expressing at mental level as love that provides the momentary fulfillment, and thus happiness of ones own ananda swaruupa, of the self itself. Those who are tuned intellectually also can appreciate sometimes the beauty of order in logic, where the beauty expressing as admiration and then love that involves identity. In essence, I love what gives me happiness; and in that love, the duality or separateness of the subject and the object of love ceases. In a sense, soundarym is different from aiswaryam, where aiswaryam means glory. In contrast to love, Aiswaryam, invokes an intellectual admiration, a respect or reverence; and some times may degenerate to even jealousy. There is a gulf of distance between the subject and object. To bridge that gulf, the subject may surrender to the object of reverence, only if the attitude of reverence combines with the attitude of gratitude. This is the relation between a disciple and his teacher, or between a devotee and his deity.
The story of Rama, every Hindu knows – from a child to the adult. Yet, one still gets fascinated in hearing that story again and again. It is not history but it is HIS story. When someone shows us their personal photo album, we do not show much interest. Because of obligation we see through the pages turning them as fast as we can. However, if it contains our picture, then we are attracted to see. Even after many years, if it is our picture, we do not like to throw that picture, and would like to preserve it for our later seeing. We do not loose interest to see it again and again – because it is our picture not others. In essence, if it is something that is ours, we do not loose interest to hear or to see; that is called mamakaara. If so, why do we want to hear the story of Rama again and again? The love for Rama is expression of love for oneself too. It is not Rama’s story – it is our story. Rama means one who revels in everyone and He is the one in whom everyone revels. The one who revels in everyone is the Lord himself -I am in the heart of everybody says the Lord, heart being the seat of love. In essence, it is the self that is the core of one’s individuality. The story of Rama is the story of righteous over evil, story of Dharma over adharma, story of success against all odds, the story of the self, which we cherish, which we ourselves would want to be. Rama was the beauty incarnated. Bhagavan Tulasidasji describing the beauty of Rama, says his eyes are like lotus flower, his face is like lotus flower and in fact his every organ was like lotus flower, so delicate, so full with fragrance. Why is the analogy with lotus, we may ask. Lotus is that which grows out of muddy waters (pankaja, born out of mud). Yet, in spite of it, it stands out with all its beauty and fragrance untouched by the surroundings and even glorifying them. Rama’s beauty was so captivating that even the Rakshasas like Khara and Dushana said that they have no heart to fight with him. The name is so captivating and glorifying that even the chanting of it in reverse as mara, mara,.., converted a butcher into a sage (Valmeeki). While presence of Rama had blessed the people of Ayodhya as well as many sages and saints at that time, but the name has is become even more powerful, since it has been blessing millions since then. Such is the beauty of Rama, in name and form.
Many have written on Ramayana. One famous poet says- it is not famous poets who wrote on Ramayana, but the ones who wrote on Ramayana became famous poets - that is the glory of Ramayana. The sage Valmeeki, when he first saw a hunter killing one of the two birds that are in love, he could not contain the sorrow or shoka. Words came out of his sorrow and become the first sloka. The shoka (sorrow) is transformed into sloka (poem), even to the surprise of the great Rishi, and made him ultimately into poet, in fact as the first poet. As he was pondering on the sloka, getting concerned of why he cursed the hunter in the form of sloka, Brahmaji appeared, and blessed the sage, saying that Goddes Saraswati herself expressed in the form of Sloka. He advised him that he should compose the story of Rama that he heard recently from the Sage Narada.
Rama means the one who loves all and also the one whom everyone loves. That is the very self within. Pujya Gurudev described a Vedantic significance for the story. He is born in ayodhya, meaning where there are no internal conflicts, to Dasharatha, meaning the one in whom all ten sense organs (five sense organs and five organs of action) are fully under control. He has to leave ayodhya when conflict arose, to dwell in forests where meditative sages are there contemplating on the self with pure heart. The whole of ayodhya was trying to follow Rama. In the forest of the world, the mind (Sita) gets carried away or gets side-tracked with the fascinations of the glittering world that lures in the form of a golden dear, gets lost and gets captured by the sense indulgence even deceptively in the form of Dahshamukha, the ten headed monster (five sense organs and five organs of action), whose whole life is all the time centered in stomaching all those enjoyments, by hook or crook. When the mind later repents and longs for Rama, the self within, He has to come as a teacher and destroy the ego with Brahmaastra or aham brahmaasmi, aiming at the stomach which is the center of indulgence. Sita, the mind, after the complete purification by fire of spiritual sadhana joins back with Rama, the self within. Thus Ramayana has inspired many authors where the purpose of life is being pointed – it is not just a story that fascinates children but a message of the very purpose of ones life, the story of dharma, the story of the longing mind which is in search of ones own love, the happiness that one is, and uniting with that source of happiness. It is the story of duty bounded by love, story of message to whole humanity for its evolution.
---------------
Based on the introductory talk by Swami Tejomayanandaji on Sundara Ramayana during mahasamadhi camp in LA in 2010...Sadananda
Soudaryam means beauty. What do we mean by beauty? When do we say that something is beautiful? To start with, when an object appeals to our eyes, we say it is beautiful. Beauty is that X-factor that makes us admire, that which makes the object to stand out from its surroundings, that which is esthetically appealing to our vision, that which seems to have a perfection, an order or a structure. For example, not many people can appreciate the modern art, where deeper thinking may be required to appreciate the message depicted by the artist – which has more appealing to the intellect than the mind. In contrast, a beautiful object appeals immediately to our emotions. Subsequently, we may also admire intellectually the creator of that beauty and appreciate the intelligence behind that creation. Soundaryam or beauty has immediate mental or emotional appreciation, as our experience shows. Beauty is that which melts our hearts and fills our heart with noble sentiments. For example, when we see the beautiful flower that is in full blossom with all its fragrance, which is radiating with the brilliant colors and textures, our vision gets arrested, at least for few seconds. In those moments of admiration, we forget the rest of the world, and we even forget ourselves since there is no other thought that arises, other than emotional identity with that beauty. The mind itself becomes silent, with no words to express or verbalize it – other than some meaningless mantras – Oh!, Wah!, or What a beauty!, etc. The intellect may step in later with some critical analysis involving comparisons and contrasts with the things that were seen in the past, with gradations in the scale of beauty, with a desire to own it, or to be proud of it if it is already owned, or to be jealous of the person who owns it . We do not understand what is satyam and jnaanam but we understand sundaram, beauty and ananda or joy associated with it; the total fulfillment even for few moments of joy in the vision of the beauty.
Thus, when there is a beauty, the mind is attracted to it. Hence attraction is the expression of soudaryam, that which is beautiful. The perfection or the order that exists in the object manifests as attraction towards it, which in turn invokes love and passion. This may degenerate later into the desire to posses the object. Before the desire arises, there is an emotional identity with the object of love, which is the object of attraction, which is the object of beauty. There is a saying that the beauty is in the eyes of beholder. Thus beauty causes attraction and expresses as love for the object; and that love involves an identity with oneself bridging the gap between the seer and the seen, at least for those moments. No words can reach to express that beauty, that love, that happiness. Every object of beauty is a creative expression or vibhuuti of the creator, the supreme.
At the sense level of perception, a thing of beauty is seen through the order in the created object, expressing at mental level as love that provides the momentary fulfillment, and thus happiness of ones own ananda swaruupa, of the self itself. Those who are tuned intellectually also can appreciate sometimes the beauty of order in logic, where the beauty expressing as admiration and then love that involves identity. In essence, I love what gives me happiness; and in that love, the duality or separateness of the subject and the object of love ceases. In a sense, soundarym is different from aiswaryam, where aiswaryam means glory. In contrast to love, Aiswaryam, invokes an intellectual admiration, a respect or reverence; and some times may degenerate to even jealousy. There is a gulf of distance between the subject and object. To bridge that gulf, the subject may surrender to the object of reverence, only if the attitude of reverence combines with the attitude of gratitude. This is the relation between a disciple and his teacher, or between a devotee and his deity.
The story of Rama, every Hindu knows – from a child to the adult. Yet, one still gets fascinated in hearing that story again and again. It is not history but it is HIS story. When someone shows us their personal photo album, we do not show much interest. Because of obligation we see through the pages turning them as fast as we can. However, if it contains our picture, then we are attracted to see. Even after many years, if it is our picture, we do not like to throw that picture, and would like to preserve it for our later seeing. We do not loose interest to see it again and again – because it is our picture not others. In essence, if it is something that is ours, we do not loose interest to hear or to see; that is called mamakaara. If so, why do we want to hear the story of Rama again and again? The love for Rama is expression of love for oneself too. It is not Rama’s story – it is our story. Rama means one who revels in everyone and He is the one in whom everyone revels. The one who revels in everyone is the Lord himself -I am in the heart of everybody says the Lord, heart being the seat of love. In essence, it is the self that is the core of one’s individuality. The story of Rama is the story of righteous over evil, story of Dharma over adharma, story of success against all odds, the story of the self, which we cherish, which we ourselves would want to be. Rama was the beauty incarnated. Bhagavan Tulasidasji describing the beauty of Rama, says his eyes are like lotus flower, his face is like lotus flower and in fact his every organ was like lotus flower, so delicate, so full with fragrance. Why is the analogy with lotus, we may ask. Lotus is that which grows out of muddy waters (pankaja, born out of mud). Yet, in spite of it, it stands out with all its beauty and fragrance untouched by the surroundings and even glorifying them. Rama’s beauty was so captivating that even the Rakshasas like Khara and Dushana said that they have no heart to fight with him. The name is so captivating and glorifying that even the chanting of it in reverse as mara, mara,.., converted a butcher into a sage (Valmeeki). While presence of Rama had blessed the people of Ayodhya as well as many sages and saints at that time, but the name has is become even more powerful, since it has been blessing millions since then. Such is the beauty of Rama, in name and form.
Many have written on Ramayana. One famous poet says- it is not famous poets who wrote on Ramayana, but the ones who wrote on Ramayana became famous poets - that is the glory of Ramayana. The sage Valmeeki, when he first saw a hunter killing one of the two birds that are in love, he could not contain the sorrow or shoka. Words came out of his sorrow and become the first sloka. The shoka (sorrow) is transformed into sloka (poem), even to the surprise of the great Rishi, and made him ultimately into poet, in fact as the first poet. As he was pondering on the sloka, getting concerned of why he cursed the hunter in the form of sloka, Brahmaji appeared, and blessed the sage, saying that Goddes Saraswati herself expressed in the form of Sloka. He advised him that he should compose the story of Rama that he heard recently from the Sage Narada.
Rama means the one who loves all and also the one whom everyone loves. That is the very self within. Pujya Gurudev described a Vedantic significance for the story. He is born in ayodhya, meaning where there are no internal conflicts, to Dasharatha, meaning the one in whom all ten sense organs (five sense organs and five organs of action) are fully under control. He has to leave ayodhya when conflict arose, to dwell in forests where meditative sages are there contemplating on the self with pure heart. The whole of ayodhya was trying to follow Rama. In the forest of the world, the mind (Sita) gets carried away or gets side-tracked with the fascinations of the glittering world that lures in the form of a golden dear, gets lost and gets captured by the sense indulgence even deceptively in the form of Dahshamukha, the ten headed monster (five sense organs and five organs of action), whose whole life is all the time centered in stomaching all those enjoyments, by hook or crook. When the mind later repents and longs for Rama, the self within, He has to come as a teacher and destroy the ego with Brahmaastra or aham brahmaasmi, aiming at the stomach which is the center of indulgence. Sita, the mind, after the complete purification by fire of spiritual sadhana joins back with Rama, the self within. Thus Ramayana has inspired many authors where the purpose of life is being pointed – it is not just a story that fascinates children but a message of the very purpose of ones life, the story of dharma, the story of the longing mind which is in search of ones own love, the happiness that one is, and uniting with that source of happiness. It is the story of duty bounded by love, story of message to whole humanity for its evolution.
---------------
Based on the introductory talk by Swami Tejomayanandaji on Sundara Ramayana during mahasamadhi camp in LA in 2010...Sadananda
Nan Yar, Who am I? by Ramana Maharshi.
Nan Yar, Who am I? by Ramana Maharshi.
Who am I?
Page 1..from the David Godman site...
Sri Ramana Maharshi
This essay, composed by Bhagavan in the mid-1920s, is the work that originated with answers written in the sand in 1901. For many years it was the standard introduction to Bhagavan's teachings. Its publication was subsidised and copies in many languages were always available in the ashram's bookstore, enabling new visitors to acquaint themselves with Bhagavan's practical advice.
Although it continues to be a standard primer for those who want to know what Bhagavan taught, parts of Who Am I? are quite technical. Since Sivaprakasam Pillai, the devotee who asked the questions in 1901, was well acquainted with philosophical terminology, Bhagavan freely used technical terms in many of his answers. I have explained many of these in notes that alternate with the text. The words of the original essay are printed in bold type. Everything else is my own commentary or explanation.
Since these explanations were originally answers to Sivaprakasam Pillai's questions, I have included some of the original questions in my own notes. Before each new section of Who am I? begins, I give, if possible, the question that prompted it. Towards the end of the essay Bhagavan took portions from different answers and amalgamated them into single paragraphs, making it hard to know for sure whether he is answering a particular question or merely giving a teaching statement.
The paragraph that begins the essay was not given out in response to a question. It was composed by Bhagavan when he was rewriting the work in the 1920s. Many philosophical works begin with a statement about the nature of happiness and the means by which it can be attained or discovered. Bhagavan has followed this tradition in this presentation
Every living being longs to be perpetually happy, without any misery. Since in everyone the highest love is alone felt for oneself, and since happiness alone is the cause of love, in order to attain that happiness, which is one's real nature and which is experienced daily in the mindless state of deep sleep, it is necessary to know oneself. To achieve that, enquiry in the form 'Who am I?' is the foremost means.
Question: Who am I?
'Who am I?' The physical body, composed of the seven dhatus, is not 'I'. The five sense organs� and the five types of perception known through the senses� are not 'I'. The five parts of the body which act� and their functions� are not 'I'. The five vital airs such as prana, which perform the five vital functions such as respiration, are not 'I'. Even the mind that thinks is not 'I'. In the state of deep sleep vishaya vasanas remain. Devoid of sensory knowledge and activity, even this [state] is not 'I'. After negating all of the above as 'not I, not I', the knowledge that alone remains is itself 'I'. The nature of knowledge is sat-chit-ananda [being-consciousness-bliss].
Vasanas is a key word in Who am I? It can be defined as, 'the impressions of anything remaining unconsciously in the mind; the present consciousness of past perceptions; knowledge derived from memory; latent tendencies formed by former actions, thoughts and speech.' It is usually rendered in English as 'latent tendencies'. Vishaya vasanas are those latent mental tendencies that impel one to indulge in knowledge or perceptions derived from the five senses. In a broader context it may also include indulging in any mental activity such as daydreaming or fantasizing, where the content of the thoughts is derived from past habits or desires.
The seven dhatus are chyle, blood, flesh, fat, marrow, bone and semen. The five sense organs are the ears, skin, eyes, tongue and nose, and the five types of perception or knowledge, called vishayas, are sound, touch, sight, taste and smell. The five parts of the body that act are the mouth, the legs, the hands, the anus, and the genitals and their functions are speaking, walking, giving, excreting and enjoying. All the items on these lists are included in the original text. I have relegated them to this explanatory note to facilitate easy reading.
The five vital airs (prana vayus) are not listed in the original text. They are responsible for maintaining the health of the body. They convert inhaled air and ingested food into the energy required for the healthy and harmonious functioning of the body.
This paragraph of Who am I? has an interesting history. Sivaprakasam Pillai's original question was 'Who am I?', the first three words of the paragraph. Bhagavan's reply, which can be found at the end of the paragraph, was 'Knowledge itself is ''I''. The nature of knowledge is sat-chit-ananda.' Everything else in this paragraph was interpolated later by Sivaprakasam Pillai prior to the first publication of the question-and-answer version of the text in 1923. The word that is translated as 'knowledge' is the Tamil equivalent of 'jnana'. So, the answer to that original question 'Who am I?' is, 'Jnana is ''I'' and the nature of jnana is sat-chit-ananda'.
When Bhagavan saw the printed text he exclaimed, 'I did not give this extra portion. How did it find a place here?'
He was told that Sivaprakasam Pillai had added the additional information, including all the long lists of physical organs and their functions, in order to help him understand the answer more clearly. When Bhagavan wrote the Who Am I? answers in an essay form, he retained these interpolations but had the printer mark the original answer in bold type so that devotees could distinguish between the two.
This interpolation does not give a correct rendering of Bhagavan's teachings on self-enquiry. In the following exchange(1) Bhagavan explains how self-enquiry should be done, and why the 'not I, not I' approach is an unproductive one:
Q: I begin to ask myself 'Who am I?', eliminate the body as not 'I', the breath as not 'I', and I am not able to proceed further.
B: Well, that is as far as the intellect can go. Your process is only intellectual. Indeed, all the scriptures mention the process only to guide the seeker to know the truth. The truth cannot be directly pointed at. Hence, this intellectual process.
You see, the one who eliminates the 'not I' cannot eliminate the 'I'. To say 'I am not this' or 'I am that' there must be an 'I'. This 'I' is only the ego or the 'I'-thought. After the rising up of this 'I'-thought, all other thoughts arise. The 'I'-thought is therefore the root thought. If the root is pulled out all others are at the same time uprooted. Therefore, seek the root 'I', question yourself 'Who am I?' Find the source and then all these other ideas will vanish and the pure Self will remain.
Question: Will there be realization of the Self even while the world is there, and taken to be real?
If the mind, which is the cause of all knowledge and all actions, subsides, the perception of the world will cease. [If one perceives a rope, imagining it to be a snake] perception of the rope, which is the substratum, will not occur unless the perception of the snake, which has been superimposed on it, goes. Similarly, the perception of one's real nature, the substratum, will not be obtained unless the perception of the world, which is a superimposition, ceases.
Question: What is the nature of the mind?
That which is called 'mind', which projects all thoughts, is an awesome power existing within the Self, one's real nature. If we discard all thoughts and look [to see what remains when there are no thoughts, it will be found that] there is no such entity as mind remaining separate [from those thoughts]. Therefore, thought itself is the nature of the mind. There is no such thing as 'the world' independent of thoughts. There are no thoughts in deep sleep, and there is no world. In waking and dream there are thoughts, and there is also the world. Just as a spider emits the thread of a web from within itself and withdraws it again into itself, in the same way the mind projects the world from within itself and later reabsorbs it into itself. When the mind emanates from the Self, the world appears. Consequently, when the world appears, the Self is not seen, and when the Self appears or shines, the world will not appear.
If one goes on examining the nature of the mind, it will finally be discovered that [what was taken to be] the mind is really only one's self. That which is called one's self is really Atman, one's real nature. The mind always depends for its existence on something tangible. It cannot subsist by itself. It is the mind that is called sukshma sarira [the subtle body] or jiva [the soul].
Question: What is the path of enquiry for understanding the nature of the mind?
That which arises in the physical body as 'I' is the mind. If one enquires, 'In what place in the body does this ''I'' first arise?' it will be known to be in the hridayam. That is the birthplace of the mind. Even if one incessantly thinks 'I, I', it will lead to that place. Of all thoughts that arise in the mind, the thought 'I' is the first one. It is only after the rise of this [thought] that other thoughts arise. It is only after the first personal pronoun arises that the second and third personal pronouns appear. Without the first person, the second and third persons cannot exist.
Hridayam is usually translated as 'Heart', but it has no connection with the physical heart. Bhagavan used it as a synonym for the Self, pointing out on several occasions that it could be split up into two parts, hrit and ayam, which together mean, 'this is the centre'. Sometimes he would say that the 'I'-thought arises from the hridayam and eventually subsides there again. He would also sometimes indicate that the spiritual Heart was inside the body on the right aside of the chest, but he would often qualify this by saying that this was only true from the standpoint of those who identified themselves with a body. For a jnani, one who has realised the Self, the hridayam or Heart is not located anywhere, or even everywhere, because it is beyond all spatial concepts. The following answer (2) summarises Bhagavan's views on this matter:
I ask you to see where the 'I' arises in your body, but it is not really quite true to say that the 'I' rises from and merges on the right side of the chest. The Heart is another name for the reality, and it is neither inside nor outside the body. There can be no in or out for it since it alone is� so long as one identifies with the body and thinks that he is in the body, he is advised to see where in the body the 'I'-thought rises and merges again.
A hint of this can also be found in this paragraph of Who am I? in the sentence in which Bhagavan asks devotees to enquire 'In what place in the body does this ''I'' first arise?'
Ordinarily, idam, which is translated here as 'place', means only that, but Bhagavan often gave it a broader meaning by using it to signify the state of the Self. Later in the essay, for example, he writes, 'The place [idam] where even the slightest trace of ''I'' does not exist is swarupa [one's real nature]'.
Sadhu Natanananda, on the flyleaf of his Tamil work Sri Ramana Darshanam, records a similar statement from Bhagavan: 'Those who resort to this place [idam] will obtain Atma-jnana automatically.' Clearly, he cannot be speaking of the physical environment of his ashram because paying a visit there didn't necessarily result in enlightenment.
So, when Bhagavan writes 'In what place�' he is not necessarily indicating that one should look for the 'I' in a particular location. He is instead saying that that the 'I' rises from the dimensionless Self, and that one should seek its source there.
As he once told Kapali Sastri, (3) 'You should try to have rather than locate the experience'.
Question: How will the mind become quiescent?
The mind will only subside by means of the enquiry 'Who am I?' The thought 'Who am I?', destroying all other thoughts, will itself be finally destroyed like the stick used for stirring the funeral pyre.
Question: What is the means for constantly holding on to the thought 'Who am I?' And what is jnana drishti?
If other thoughts arise, one should, without attempting to complete them, enquire, 'To whom did they occur?' What does it matter if ever so many thoughts arise? At the very moment that each thought rises, if one vigilantly enquires 'To whom did this appear?' it will be known 'To me'. If one then enquires 'Who am I?' the mind will turn back to its source and the thought that had arisen will also subside. By repeatedly practising in this way, the mind will increasingly acquire the power to abide at its source. When the mind, which is subtle, is externalised via the brain and the sense organs, names and forms, which are material, appear. When it abides in the Heart, names and forms disappear. Keeping the mind in the Heart, not allowing it to go out, is called 'facing the Self' or 'facing inwards'. Allowing it to go out from the Heart is termed 'facing outwards' When the mind abides in the Heart in this way, the 'I', the root of all thoughts, [vanishes]. Having vanished, the ever-existing Self alone will shine. The state where not even the slightest trace of the thought 'I' remains is alone swarupa [one's real nature]. This alone is called mauna [silence]. Being still in this way can alone be called jnana drishti [seeing through true knowledge]. Making the mind subside into the Self is 'being still'. On the other hand, knowing the thoughts of others, knowing the three times [past present and future] and knowing events in distant places - these can never be jnana drishti.
The word swarupa is another key word in the text. It means 'one's real nature' or 'one's real form'. Each time the phrase 'one's real nature' appears in this text, it is a translation of swarupa. Bhagavan's repeated use of the word as a synonym for the Self indicates that the Self is not something that is reached or attained. Rather, it is what one really is, and what one always has been.
Mauna is another of the synonyms Bhagavan used to describe the Self:
Q: What is mauna [silence]?
A: That state which transcends speech and thought is mauna�. That which is, is mauna. Sages say that the state in which the thought 'I' does not rise even in the least, alone is swarupa, which means mauna. That silent Self is alone God�(4)
In jnana, the state of Self-knowledge or Self-realisation, there is no one who sees, nor are there objects that are seen. There is only seeing. The seeing that takes place in this state, called jnana drishti, is both true seeing and true knowing. It is therefore called 'seeing through true knowledge'.
In Day by Day with Bhagavan (17.10.46) Bhagavan points out that this seeing is really being and should not be confused with or limited to the sensory activity that goes under the same name: 'You are the Self. You exist always. Nothing more can be predicated of the Self than it exists. Seeing God or the Self is only being God or your Self. Seeing is being.' The same concept was elegantly formulated by Meister Eckart, the medieval German mystic, when he remarked, during one of his sermons, 'The eye by which I see God is the same eye by which God sees me. My eye and God's eye are one and the same, one in seeing, one in knowing�'
Question: What is the nature of the Self?
The Self, one's real nature, alone exists and is real. The world, the soul and God are superimpositions on it like [the illusory appearance of] silver in mother-of-pearl. These three appear and disappear simultaneously. Self itself is the world; Self itself is the 'I'; Self itself is God; all is Siva, the Self.
At the beginning of this paragraph Bhagavan says, in effect, that the world, the soul and God are illusory appearances. Later he says that all three are the Self, and therefore real. This should be seen as a paradox rather than a contradiction. The following answer (5) clarifies Bhagavan's views:
Sankara was criticised for his views on maya [illusion] without understanding him. He said that (1) Brahman [the Self] is real (2) the universe is unreal, and (3) Brahman is the universe. He did not stop at the second because the third explains the other two. It signifies that the universe is real if perceived as the Self and unreal if perceived as apart from the Self. Hence maya and reality are one and the same.
The seeing of names and forms is a misperception because, in the Self, the one reality, none exist. Therefore, if a world of names and forms is seen, it must necessarily be an illusory one. Bhagavan explains this in verse 49 of Guru Vachaka Kovai:
Just as fire is obscured by smoke, the shining light of consciousness is obscured by the assemblage of names and forms. When, by compassionate divine grace, the mind becomes clear, the nature of the world will be known to be not illusory forms, but only the reality.
Question: Are there any other means for making the mind quiescent?
To make the mind subside, there is no adequate means except enquiry. If controlled by other means, the mind will remain in an apparent state of subsidence, but will rise again. For example, through pranayama [breath control] the mind will subside. However, the mind will remain controlled only as long as the prana [see the following note] is controlled. When the prana comes out, the mind will also come out and wander under the influence of vasanas. The source of the mind and the prana is one and the same. Thought itself is the nature of the mind, and the thought 'I' which indeed is the mind's primal thought, is itself the ahankara [the ego]. From where the ego originates, from there alone the breath also rises. Therefore, when the mind subsides, the prana will also subside, and when prana subsides, the mind will also subside. However, although the mind subsides in deep sleep, the prana does not subside. It is arranged in this way as a divine plan for the protection of the body and so that others do not take the body to be dead. When the mind subsides in the waking state and in samadhi, the prana also subsides. The prana is the gross form of the mind. Until the time of death, the mind retains the prana in the body. When the body dies, the mind forcibly carries away the prana. Therefore, pranayama is only an aid for controlling the mind; it will not bring about its destruction.
According to the Upanishads, prana is the principle of life and consciousness. It is the life breath of all the beings in the universe. They are born through it, live by it, and when they die, their individual prana dissolves into the cosmic prana. Prana is usually translated as 'breath' or 'vital breath', but this is only one of many of its manifestations in the human body. It is absorbed by both breathing and eating and by the prana vayus (mentioned earlier) into energy that sustains the body. Since it is assimilated through breathing, it is widely held that one can control the prana in the body by controlling the breathing.
According to yoga philosophy, and other schools of thought agree, mind and prana are intimately connected. The collective name for all the mental faculties is chitta, which is divided into:
(a) manas (the mind), which has the faculties of attention and choosing.
(b) buddhi (the intellect), which reasons and determines distinctions.
(c) ahankara, the individual feeling of 'I', sometimes merely translated as ego.
Chitta, according to yoga philosophy, is propelled by prana and vasanas and moves in the direction of whichever force is more powerful. Thus, the yogis maintain that by controlling the breath, which indirectly controls the flow of pranas, the chitta can be controlled. Bhagavan gives his own views on this later in the essay.
The reference to samadhi needs some explanation. According to Bhagavan,(6) 'Samadhi is the state in which the unbroken experience of existence is attained by the still mind.'
Elsewhere he has said, more simply, 'Holding onto reality is samadhi.' (7)
Though Bhagavan would sometimes say that a person in samadhi is experiencing the Self, these samadhis do not constitute permanent realisation. They are temporary states in which the mind is either completely still or in abeyance.
Next: Eventually, all that one has learnt will have to be forgotten.
Who am I?
Page 2
Sri Ramana Maharshi
The next section is a continuation of the answer to the previous question: 'Are there any other means for making the mind quiescent?'
Like breath control, meditation on a form of God, repetition of sacred words and regulation of diet are mere aids for controlling the mind. Through meditation on a form of God and through the repetition of sacred words the mind becomes focused on one point. An elephant's trunk is always moving around, but when a chain is given to it to hold in its trunk, that elephant will go on its way, holding onto the chain instead of trying to catch other things with it. Similarly, when the mind, which is always wandering, is trained to hold onto any name or form of God, it will only cling to that. Because the mind branches out into innumerable thoughts, each thought becomes very weak. As thoughts subside more and more, one-pointedness [of mind] is gained. A mind that has gained strength in this way will easily succeed in self-enquiry. Of all regulations taking sattvic food in moderate quantities is the best. Through [this], the sattvic quality of the mind gets enhanced and becomes an aid to self-enquiry.
A sattvic diet is one which is vegetarian and which also excludes stimulating substances - such as chillies, tobacco, alcohol - and food that is excessively sour, salty or pungent.
Some Indian systems of thought maintain that the mind is composed of three fluctuating components called gunas:
(a) sattva, purity or harmony.
(b) rajas, activity.
(c) tamas, inertia or sluggishness.
Since the type of food eaten affects the quality of the mind, non-sattvic foods promote rajas and tamas. The sattvic mind is the most desirable. One of the aims of spiritual practice is to increase the sattvic component at the expense of rajas and tamas.
Question: Is it possible for the vishaya vasanas, which come from beginningless time, to be resolved, and for one to remain as the pure Self?
Although vishaya vasanas, which have been recurring down the ages, rise in countless numbers like the waves of an ocean, they will all perish as meditation on one's real nature becomes more and more intense. Without giving room even to the doubting thought, 'Is it possible to destroy all these vasanas and remain as Self alone?' one should persistently and tightly hold onto meditation on one's real nature. However great a sinner one may be, one should, instead of lamenting, 'Oh, I am a sinner! How can I attain liberation?' completely give up even the thought of being a sinner. One steadfast in meditation on one's real nature will surely be saved.
Question: How long should enquiry be practised? What is non-attachment?
As long as there are vishaya vasanas in the mind, the enquiry 'Who am I?' is necessary. As and when thoughts arise, one should, then and there, annihilate them all through self-enquiry in the very place of their origin. Not giving attention to anything other than oneself is non-attachment or desirelessness; not leaving the Self is jnana [true knowledge]. In truth, these two [non-attachment and desirelessness] are one and the same. Just as a pearl diver, tying a stone to his waist, dives into the sea and takes the pearl lying on the bottom, so everyone, diving deeply within himself in a detached way can obtain the pearl of the Self. If one resorts uninterruptedly to remembrance of one's real nature until one attains the Self, that alone will be sufficient. As long as there are enemies within the fort, they will continue to come out. If one continues to cut all of them down as and when they emerge, the fort will fall into our hands.
Question: Is it not possible for God or the Guru to effect the release of the soul?
God and Guru are, in truth, not different. Just as the prey that has fallen into the jaws of the tiger cannot escape, so those who have come under the glance of the Guru's grace will never be forsaken. Nevertheless, one should follow without fail the path shown by the Guru.
Remaining firmly in Self-abidance, without giving the least scope for the rising of any thought other than the thought of the Self, is surrendering oneself to God. However much of a burden we throw on God, He bears it all. Since the one supreme ruling power is performing all activities, why should we, instead of yielding ourselves to it, think, 'I should not act in this way; I should act in that way'? When we know that the train is carrying all the freight, why should we, who travel in it, suffer by keeping our own small luggage on our heads instead of putting it down and remaining happily at ease?
In the last three sections Bhagavan has used three terms, swarupa dhyanam (meditation on one's real nature), swarupa smaranai (remembrance of one's real nature), and atma chintanai (the thought of the Self) to indicate the process by which one becomes aware of the Self. They should not be understood to mean that one should try to focus one's attention on the Self, for the real Self can never be an object of thought. The benedictory verse of Ulladu Narpadu explains what Bhagavan meant by such terms. It asks the question, 'How to meditate on that reality which is called the Heart?' since that reality alone exists, and it answers by saying, 'To abide in the Heart as it really is, is truly meditating.' That is to say, one can be the Heart by 'abiding as it is', but one cannot experience it as an object of attention.
This interpretation is confirmed by the sentence in the last extract from Who Am I? in which Bhagavan equates atma chintanai (the thought of the Self) with atma nishta (Self-abidance).
In a similar vein Bhagavan remarks later in the essay that 'always keeping the mind fixed in the Self alone can be called self-enquiry'.
Question: What is happiness?
What is called happiness is merely the nature of the Self. Happiness and the Self are not different. The happiness of the Self alone exists; that alone is real. There is no happiness at all in even a single one of the [many] things in the world. We believe that we derive happiness from them on account of aviveka [a lack of discrimination, an inability to ascertain what is correct]. When the mind is externalised, it experiences misery. The truth is, whenever our thoughts [that is, our desires] get fulfilled, the mind turns back to its source and experiences Self-happiness alone. In this way the mind wanders without rest, emerging and abandoning the Self and [later] returning within. The shade under a tree is very pleasant. Away from it the sun's heat is scorching. A person who is wandering around outside reaches the shade and is cooled. After a while he goes out again, but unable to bear the scorching heat, returns to the tree. In this way he is engaged in going from the shade into the hot sunshine and in coming back from the hot sunshine into the shade. A person who acts like this is an aviveki [someone who lacks discrimination], for a discriminating person would never leave the shade. By analogy, the mind of a jnani never leaves Brahman, whereas the mind of someone who has not realised the Self is such that it suffers by wandering in the world before turning back to Brahman for a while to enjoy happiness. What is called 'the world' is only thoughts. When the world disappears, that is, when there are no thoughts, the mind experiences bliss; when the world appears, it experiences suffering.
Question: Is not everything the work of God?
In the mere presence of the sun, which rises without desire, intention or effort, the magnifying glass emits hot light, the lotus blossoms and people begin, perform and cease their work. In front of a magnet a needle moves. Likewise, through the mere influence of the presence of God, who has no sankalpa [intention to accomplish anything], souls, who are governed by the three or five divine functions, perform and cease their activities in accordance with their respective karmas. Even so, He [God] is not someone who has sankalpa, nor will a single act ever touch him. This [untouchability] can be compared to the actions of the world not touching the sun, or to the good and bad qualities of the elements [earth, water, fire and air] not affecting the immanent space.
Sankalpa means 'resolve', 'will', or 'intention'. God has no personal sankalpa. That is to say, He does not decide or even think about what he should do. Though mature devotees 'bloom' on account of his presence, it is not because He has decided to bestow His grace on these fortunate few. His presence is available to all, but only the mature convert it into realisation.
The three divine functions are creation, sustenance and destruction. The five divine functions are these three plus veiling and grace. According to many Hindu scriptures, God creates, preserves and eventually destroys the world. While it exists, He hides His true nature from the people in it through the veiling power of maya, illusion, while simultaneously emanating grace so that mature devotees can lift the veils of illusion and become aware of Him as He really is.
Question: For those who long for release, is it useful to read books?
It is said in all the scriptures that to attain liberation one should make the mind subside. After realising that mind control is the ultimate injunction of the scriptures, it is pointless to read scriptures endlessly. In order to know the mind, it is necessary to know who one is. How [can one know who one is] by researching instead in the scriptures? One should know oneself through one's own eye of knowledge. For [a man called] Rama to know himself to be Rama, is a mirror necessary? One's self exists within the five sheaths, whereas the scriptures are outside them. This self is the one to be enquired into. Therefore, researching in the scriptures, ignoring even the five sheaths, is futile. Enquiring 'Who am I that am in bondage?' and knowing one's real nature is alone liberation.
In self-enquiry one is enquiring into the nature and origin of the individual self, not the all-pervasive Atman. When Self appears in capitals, it denotes Atman, the real Self. When self it appears in lower case, it refers to the individual.
The five sheaths or kosas envelop and contain the individual self. They are:
(1) annamayakosa, the food sheath, which corresponds to the physical body.
(2) pranamayakosa, the sheath made of prana.
(3) manomayakosa, the sheath of the mind.
(4) vijnanmayakosa, the sheath of the intellect.
(5) anandamayakosa, the sheath of bliss.
Sheaths two, three and four comprise the subtle body (sukshma sarira) while the fifth sheath, called the causal body, corresponds to the state of the individual self during sleep.
The individual 'I' functions through the five sheaths. Practitioners of the neti-neti '(not this, not this') type of sadhana reject their association with the five sheaths in the way described in the second paragraph of Who Am I? The idea behind this practice is that if one rejects all thoughts, feelings and sensations as 'not I', the real 'I' will eventually shine in a form that is unlimited by or to the sheaths.
Keeping the mind fixed in the Self at all times is called self-enquiry, whereas thinking oneself to be Brahman, which is sat-chit-ananda [being-consciousness-bliss], is meditation. Eventually, all that one has learnt will have to be forgotten.
One can distinguish different levels of experience in the practice of self-enquiry. In the beginning one attempts to eliminate all transient thoughts by concentrating on or looking for the primal 'I'-thought. This corresponds to the stage Bhagavan described earlier in the essay when one cuts down all the enemies, the thoughts, as they emerge from the fortress of the mind. If one achieves success in this for any length of time, the 'I'-thought, deprived of new thoughts to attach itself to, begins to subside, and one then moves to a deeper level of experience. The 'I'-thought descends into the Heart and remains there temporarily until the residual vasanas cause it to rise again. It is this second stage that Bhagavan refers to when he says that 'keeping the mind fixed in the Self alone can be called self-enquiry'. Most practitioners of self-enquiry will readily admit that this rarely happens to them, but nevertheless, according to Bhagavan's teachings, fixing the mind in the Self should be regarded as an intermediate goal on the path to full realisation.
It is interesting to note that Bhagavan restricts the term 'self-enquiry' to this phase of the practice. This unusual definition was more or less repeated in an answer he gave to Kapali Sastri:
Q: If I go on rejecting thoughts, can I call it vichara [self-enquiry]?
A: It may be a stepping stone. But real vichara begins when you cling to yourself and are already off the mental movements, the thought waves.(8)
The following optimistic answers by Bhagavan, on keeping the mind in the Heart, may provide encouragement to those practitioners who often feel that such experiences may never come their way:
Q: How long can the mind stay or be kept in the Heart?
A: The period extends by practice.
Q: What will happen at the end of that period?
A: The mind returns to the present normal state. Unity in the Heart is replaced by a variety of perceived phenomena. This is called the outgoing mind. The Heart-going mind is called the resting mind.
When one daily practises more and more in this manner, the mind will become extremely pure due to the removal of its defects and the practice will become so easy that the purified mind will plunge into the Heart as soon as the enquiry is commenced. (9)
Bhagavan noted that 'thinking oneself to be Brahman� is meditation', not enquiry. Traditional advaitic sadhana follows the path of negation and affirmation. In the negative approach, one continuously rejects all thoughts, feelings and sensations as 'not I'. On the affirmative route one attempts to cultivate the attitude 'I am Brahman' or 'I am the Self'. Bhagavan called this latter approach, and all other techniques in which one concentrates on an idea or a form, 'meditation', and regarded all such methods as being indirect and inferior to self-enquiry.
Q: Is not affirmation of God more effective than the quest 'Who am I?' Affirmation is positive, whereas the other is negation. Moreover, it indicates separateness.
A: So long as you seek to know how to realise, this advice is given to find your Self. Your seeking the method denotes your separateness.
Q: Is it not better to say 'I am the Supreme Being' than ask 'Who am I?'
A: Who affirms? There must be one to do it. Find that one. Q: Is not meditation better than investigation?
A: Meditation implies mental imagery, whereas investigation is for the reality. The former is objective, whereas the latter is subjective.
Q: There must be a scientific approach to this subject.
A: To eschew unreality and seek the reality is scientific.(10)
Question: Is it necessary for one who longs for release to enquire into the nature of the tattvas?
Just as it is futile to examine the garbage that has to be collectively thrown away, so it is fruitless for one who is to know himself to count the numbers and scrutinise the properties of the tattvas that are veiling the Self, instead of collectively throwing them all away.
Indian philosophers have split the phenomenal world up into many different entities or categories which are called tattvas. Different schools of thought have different lists of tattvas, some being inordinately long and complicated. Bhagavan encouraged his devotees to disregard all such classifications on the grounds that, since the appearance of the world is itself an illusion, examining its component parts one by one is an exercise in futility.
Question: Is there no difference between waking and dream?
One should consider the universe to be like a dream. Except that waking is long and dreams are short, there is no difference [between the two states]. To the extent to which all the events which happen while one is awake appear to be real, to that same extent even the events that happen in dreams appear at that time to be real. In dreams, the mind assumes another body. In both the dream and the waking [states] thoughts and names-and-forms come into existence simultaneously.
The final two paragraphs of the essay are taken from an answer to a question that has already been given:
Question: Is it possible for the vishaya vasanas, which come from beginningless time, to be resolved, and for one to remain as the pure Self?
There are not two minds, one good and another evil. The mind is only one. It is only the vasanas that are either auspicious or inauspicious. When the mind is under the influence of auspicious tendencies, it is called a good mind, and when it is under the influence of inauspicious tendencies, a bad mind. However evil people may appear, one should not hate them. Likes and dislikes are both to be disliked. One should not allow the mind to dwell much on worldly matters. As far as possible, one should not interfere in the affairs of others. All that one gives to others, one gives only to oneself. If this truth is known, who indeed will not give to others? If the individual self rises, all will rise.
If the individual self subsides, all will subside. To the extent that we behave with humility, to that extent will good result. If one can continuously control the mind, one can live anywhere.
http://www.davidgodman.org/rteach/whoami2.shtml
Who am I?
Page 1..from the David Godman site...
Sri Ramana Maharshi
This essay, composed by Bhagavan in the mid-1920s, is the work that originated with answers written in the sand in 1901. For many years it was the standard introduction to Bhagavan's teachings. Its publication was subsidised and copies in many languages were always available in the ashram's bookstore, enabling new visitors to acquaint themselves with Bhagavan's practical advice.
Although it continues to be a standard primer for those who want to know what Bhagavan taught, parts of Who Am I? are quite technical. Since Sivaprakasam Pillai, the devotee who asked the questions in 1901, was well acquainted with philosophical terminology, Bhagavan freely used technical terms in many of his answers. I have explained many of these in notes that alternate with the text. The words of the original essay are printed in bold type. Everything else is my own commentary or explanation.
Since these explanations were originally answers to Sivaprakasam Pillai's questions, I have included some of the original questions in my own notes. Before each new section of Who am I? begins, I give, if possible, the question that prompted it. Towards the end of the essay Bhagavan took portions from different answers and amalgamated them into single paragraphs, making it hard to know for sure whether he is answering a particular question or merely giving a teaching statement.
The paragraph that begins the essay was not given out in response to a question. It was composed by Bhagavan when he was rewriting the work in the 1920s. Many philosophical works begin with a statement about the nature of happiness and the means by which it can be attained or discovered. Bhagavan has followed this tradition in this presentation
Every living being longs to be perpetually happy, without any misery. Since in everyone the highest love is alone felt for oneself, and since happiness alone is the cause of love, in order to attain that happiness, which is one's real nature and which is experienced daily in the mindless state of deep sleep, it is necessary to know oneself. To achieve that, enquiry in the form 'Who am I?' is the foremost means.
Question: Who am I?
'Who am I?' The physical body, composed of the seven dhatus, is not 'I'. The five sense organs� and the five types of perception known through the senses� are not 'I'. The five parts of the body which act� and their functions� are not 'I'. The five vital airs such as prana, which perform the five vital functions such as respiration, are not 'I'. Even the mind that thinks is not 'I'. In the state of deep sleep vishaya vasanas remain. Devoid of sensory knowledge and activity, even this [state] is not 'I'. After negating all of the above as 'not I, not I', the knowledge that alone remains is itself 'I'. The nature of knowledge is sat-chit-ananda [being-consciousness-bliss].
Vasanas is a key word in Who am I? It can be defined as, 'the impressions of anything remaining unconsciously in the mind; the present consciousness of past perceptions; knowledge derived from memory; latent tendencies formed by former actions, thoughts and speech.' It is usually rendered in English as 'latent tendencies'. Vishaya vasanas are those latent mental tendencies that impel one to indulge in knowledge or perceptions derived from the five senses. In a broader context it may also include indulging in any mental activity such as daydreaming or fantasizing, where the content of the thoughts is derived from past habits or desires.
The seven dhatus are chyle, blood, flesh, fat, marrow, bone and semen. The five sense organs are the ears, skin, eyes, tongue and nose, and the five types of perception or knowledge, called vishayas, are sound, touch, sight, taste and smell. The five parts of the body that act are the mouth, the legs, the hands, the anus, and the genitals and their functions are speaking, walking, giving, excreting and enjoying. All the items on these lists are included in the original text. I have relegated them to this explanatory note to facilitate easy reading.
The five vital airs (prana vayus) are not listed in the original text. They are responsible for maintaining the health of the body. They convert inhaled air and ingested food into the energy required for the healthy and harmonious functioning of the body.
This paragraph of Who am I? has an interesting history. Sivaprakasam Pillai's original question was 'Who am I?', the first three words of the paragraph. Bhagavan's reply, which can be found at the end of the paragraph, was 'Knowledge itself is ''I''. The nature of knowledge is sat-chit-ananda.' Everything else in this paragraph was interpolated later by Sivaprakasam Pillai prior to the first publication of the question-and-answer version of the text in 1923. The word that is translated as 'knowledge' is the Tamil equivalent of 'jnana'. So, the answer to that original question 'Who am I?' is, 'Jnana is ''I'' and the nature of jnana is sat-chit-ananda'.
When Bhagavan saw the printed text he exclaimed, 'I did not give this extra portion. How did it find a place here?'
He was told that Sivaprakasam Pillai had added the additional information, including all the long lists of physical organs and their functions, in order to help him understand the answer more clearly. When Bhagavan wrote the Who Am I? answers in an essay form, he retained these interpolations but had the printer mark the original answer in bold type so that devotees could distinguish between the two.
This interpolation does not give a correct rendering of Bhagavan's teachings on self-enquiry. In the following exchange(1) Bhagavan explains how self-enquiry should be done, and why the 'not I, not I' approach is an unproductive one:
Q: I begin to ask myself 'Who am I?', eliminate the body as not 'I', the breath as not 'I', and I am not able to proceed further.
B: Well, that is as far as the intellect can go. Your process is only intellectual. Indeed, all the scriptures mention the process only to guide the seeker to know the truth. The truth cannot be directly pointed at. Hence, this intellectual process.
You see, the one who eliminates the 'not I' cannot eliminate the 'I'. To say 'I am not this' or 'I am that' there must be an 'I'. This 'I' is only the ego or the 'I'-thought. After the rising up of this 'I'-thought, all other thoughts arise. The 'I'-thought is therefore the root thought. If the root is pulled out all others are at the same time uprooted. Therefore, seek the root 'I', question yourself 'Who am I?' Find the source and then all these other ideas will vanish and the pure Self will remain.
Question: Will there be realization of the Self even while the world is there, and taken to be real?
If the mind, which is the cause of all knowledge and all actions, subsides, the perception of the world will cease. [If one perceives a rope, imagining it to be a snake] perception of the rope, which is the substratum, will not occur unless the perception of the snake, which has been superimposed on it, goes. Similarly, the perception of one's real nature, the substratum, will not be obtained unless the perception of the world, which is a superimposition, ceases.
Question: What is the nature of the mind?
That which is called 'mind', which projects all thoughts, is an awesome power existing within the Self, one's real nature. If we discard all thoughts and look [to see what remains when there are no thoughts, it will be found that] there is no such entity as mind remaining separate [from those thoughts]. Therefore, thought itself is the nature of the mind. There is no such thing as 'the world' independent of thoughts. There are no thoughts in deep sleep, and there is no world. In waking and dream there are thoughts, and there is also the world. Just as a spider emits the thread of a web from within itself and withdraws it again into itself, in the same way the mind projects the world from within itself and later reabsorbs it into itself. When the mind emanates from the Self, the world appears. Consequently, when the world appears, the Self is not seen, and when the Self appears or shines, the world will not appear.
If one goes on examining the nature of the mind, it will finally be discovered that [what was taken to be] the mind is really only one's self. That which is called one's self is really Atman, one's real nature. The mind always depends for its existence on something tangible. It cannot subsist by itself. It is the mind that is called sukshma sarira [the subtle body] or jiva [the soul].
Question: What is the path of enquiry for understanding the nature of the mind?
That which arises in the physical body as 'I' is the mind. If one enquires, 'In what place in the body does this ''I'' first arise?' it will be known to be in the hridayam. That is the birthplace of the mind. Even if one incessantly thinks 'I, I', it will lead to that place. Of all thoughts that arise in the mind, the thought 'I' is the first one. It is only after the rise of this [thought] that other thoughts arise. It is only after the first personal pronoun arises that the second and third personal pronouns appear. Without the first person, the second and third persons cannot exist.
Hridayam is usually translated as 'Heart', but it has no connection with the physical heart. Bhagavan used it as a synonym for the Self, pointing out on several occasions that it could be split up into two parts, hrit and ayam, which together mean, 'this is the centre'. Sometimes he would say that the 'I'-thought arises from the hridayam and eventually subsides there again. He would also sometimes indicate that the spiritual Heart was inside the body on the right aside of the chest, but he would often qualify this by saying that this was only true from the standpoint of those who identified themselves with a body. For a jnani, one who has realised the Self, the hridayam or Heart is not located anywhere, or even everywhere, because it is beyond all spatial concepts. The following answer (2) summarises Bhagavan's views on this matter:
I ask you to see where the 'I' arises in your body, but it is not really quite true to say that the 'I' rises from and merges on the right side of the chest. The Heart is another name for the reality, and it is neither inside nor outside the body. There can be no in or out for it since it alone is� so long as one identifies with the body and thinks that he is in the body, he is advised to see where in the body the 'I'-thought rises and merges again.
A hint of this can also be found in this paragraph of Who am I? in the sentence in which Bhagavan asks devotees to enquire 'In what place in the body does this ''I'' first arise?'
Ordinarily, idam, which is translated here as 'place', means only that, but Bhagavan often gave it a broader meaning by using it to signify the state of the Self. Later in the essay, for example, he writes, 'The place [idam] where even the slightest trace of ''I'' does not exist is swarupa [one's real nature]'.
Sadhu Natanananda, on the flyleaf of his Tamil work Sri Ramana Darshanam, records a similar statement from Bhagavan: 'Those who resort to this place [idam] will obtain Atma-jnana automatically.' Clearly, he cannot be speaking of the physical environment of his ashram because paying a visit there didn't necessarily result in enlightenment.
So, when Bhagavan writes 'In what place�' he is not necessarily indicating that one should look for the 'I' in a particular location. He is instead saying that that the 'I' rises from the dimensionless Self, and that one should seek its source there.
As he once told Kapali Sastri, (3) 'You should try to have rather than locate the experience'.
Question: How will the mind become quiescent?
The mind will only subside by means of the enquiry 'Who am I?' The thought 'Who am I?', destroying all other thoughts, will itself be finally destroyed like the stick used for stirring the funeral pyre.
Question: What is the means for constantly holding on to the thought 'Who am I?' And what is jnana drishti?
If other thoughts arise, one should, without attempting to complete them, enquire, 'To whom did they occur?' What does it matter if ever so many thoughts arise? At the very moment that each thought rises, if one vigilantly enquires 'To whom did this appear?' it will be known 'To me'. If one then enquires 'Who am I?' the mind will turn back to its source and the thought that had arisen will also subside. By repeatedly practising in this way, the mind will increasingly acquire the power to abide at its source. When the mind, which is subtle, is externalised via the brain and the sense organs, names and forms, which are material, appear. When it abides in the Heart, names and forms disappear. Keeping the mind in the Heart, not allowing it to go out, is called 'facing the Self' or 'facing inwards'. Allowing it to go out from the Heart is termed 'facing outwards' When the mind abides in the Heart in this way, the 'I', the root of all thoughts, [vanishes]. Having vanished, the ever-existing Self alone will shine. The state where not even the slightest trace of the thought 'I' remains is alone swarupa [one's real nature]. This alone is called mauna [silence]. Being still in this way can alone be called jnana drishti [seeing through true knowledge]. Making the mind subside into the Self is 'being still'. On the other hand, knowing the thoughts of others, knowing the three times [past present and future] and knowing events in distant places - these can never be jnana drishti.
The word swarupa is another key word in the text. It means 'one's real nature' or 'one's real form'. Each time the phrase 'one's real nature' appears in this text, it is a translation of swarupa. Bhagavan's repeated use of the word as a synonym for the Self indicates that the Self is not something that is reached or attained. Rather, it is what one really is, and what one always has been.
Mauna is another of the synonyms Bhagavan used to describe the Self:
Q: What is mauna [silence]?
A: That state which transcends speech and thought is mauna�. That which is, is mauna. Sages say that the state in which the thought 'I' does not rise even in the least, alone is swarupa, which means mauna. That silent Self is alone God�(4)
In jnana, the state of Self-knowledge or Self-realisation, there is no one who sees, nor are there objects that are seen. There is only seeing. The seeing that takes place in this state, called jnana drishti, is both true seeing and true knowing. It is therefore called 'seeing through true knowledge'.
In Day by Day with Bhagavan (17.10.46) Bhagavan points out that this seeing is really being and should not be confused with or limited to the sensory activity that goes under the same name: 'You are the Self. You exist always. Nothing more can be predicated of the Self than it exists. Seeing God or the Self is only being God or your Self. Seeing is being.' The same concept was elegantly formulated by Meister Eckart, the medieval German mystic, when he remarked, during one of his sermons, 'The eye by which I see God is the same eye by which God sees me. My eye and God's eye are one and the same, one in seeing, one in knowing�'
Question: What is the nature of the Self?
The Self, one's real nature, alone exists and is real. The world, the soul and God are superimpositions on it like [the illusory appearance of] silver in mother-of-pearl. These three appear and disappear simultaneously. Self itself is the world; Self itself is the 'I'; Self itself is God; all is Siva, the Self.
At the beginning of this paragraph Bhagavan says, in effect, that the world, the soul and God are illusory appearances. Later he says that all three are the Self, and therefore real. This should be seen as a paradox rather than a contradiction. The following answer (5) clarifies Bhagavan's views:
Sankara was criticised for his views on maya [illusion] without understanding him. He said that (1) Brahman [the Self] is real (2) the universe is unreal, and (3) Brahman is the universe. He did not stop at the second because the third explains the other two. It signifies that the universe is real if perceived as the Self and unreal if perceived as apart from the Self. Hence maya and reality are one and the same.
The seeing of names and forms is a misperception because, in the Self, the one reality, none exist. Therefore, if a world of names and forms is seen, it must necessarily be an illusory one. Bhagavan explains this in verse 49 of Guru Vachaka Kovai:
Just as fire is obscured by smoke, the shining light of consciousness is obscured by the assemblage of names and forms. When, by compassionate divine grace, the mind becomes clear, the nature of the world will be known to be not illusory forms, but only the reality.
Question: Are there any other means for making the mind quiescent?
To make the mind subside, there is no adequate means except enquiry. If controlled by other means, the mind will remain in an apparent state of subsidence, but will rise again. For example, through pranayama [breath control] the mind will subside. However, the mind will remain controlled only as long as the prana [see the following note] is controlled. When the prana comes out, the mind will also come out and wander under the influence of vasanas. The source of the mind and the prana is one and the same. Thought itself is the nature of the mind, and the thought 'I' which indeed is the mind's primal thought, is itself the ahankara [the ego]. From where the ego originates, from there alone the breath also rises. Therefore, when the mind subsides, the prana will also subside, and when prana subsides, the mind will also subside. However, although the mind subsides in deep sleep, the prana does not subside. It is arranged in this way as a divine plan for the protection of the body and so that others do not take the body to be dead. When the mind subsides in the waking state and in samadhi, the prana also subsides. The prana is the gross form of the mind. Until the time of death, the mind retains the prana in the body. When the body dies, the mind forcibly carries away the prana. Therefore, pranayama is only an aid for controlling the mind; it will not bring about its destruction.
According to the Upanishads, prana is the principle of life and consciousness. It is the life breath of all the beings in the universe. They are born through it, live by it, and when they die, their individual prana dissolves into the cosmic prana. Prana is usually translated as 'breath' or 'vital breath', but this is only one of many of its manifestations in the human body. It is absorbed by both breathing and eating and by the prana vayus (mentioned earlier) into energy that sustains the body. Since it is assimilated through breathing, it is widely held that one can control the prana in the body by controlling the breathing.
According to yoga philosophy, and other schools of thought agree, mind and prana are intimately connected. The collective name for all the mental faculties is chitta, which is divided into:
(a) manas (the mind), which has the faculties of attention and choosing.
(b) buddhi (the intellect), which reasons and determines distinctions.
(c) ahankara, the individual feeling of 'I', sometimes merely translated as ego.
Chitta, according to yoga philosophy, is propelled by prana and vasanas and moves in the direction of whichever force is more powerful. Thus, the yogis maintain that by controlling the breath, which indirectly controls the flow of pranas, the chitta can be controlled. Bhagavan gives his own views on this later in the essay.
The reference to samadhi needs some explanation. According to Bhagavan,(6) 'Samadhi is the state in which the unbroken experience of existence is attained by the still mind.'
Elsewhere he has said, more simply, 'Holding onto reality is samadhi.' (7)
Though Bhagavan would sometimes say that a person in samadhi is experiencing the Self, these samadhis do not constitute permanent realisation. They are temporary states in which the mind is either completely still or in abeyance.
Next: Eventually, all that one has learnt will have to be forgotten.
Who am I?
Page 2
Sri Ramana Maharshi
The next section is a continuation of the answer to the previous question: 'Are there any other means for making the mind quiescent?'
Like breath control, meditation on a form of God, repetition of sacred words and regulation of diet are mere aids for controlling the mind. Through meditation on a form of God and through the repetition of sacred words the mind becomes focused on one point. An elephant's trunk is always moving around, but when a chain is given to it to hold in its trunk, that elephant will go on its way, holding onto the chain instead of trying to catch other things with it. Similarly, when the mind, which is always wandering, is trained to hold onto any name or form of God, it will only cling to that. Because the mind branches out into innumerable thoughts, each thought becomes very weak. As thoughts subside more and more, one-pointedness [of mind] is gained. A mind that has gained strength in this way will easily succeed in self-enquiry. Of all regulations taking sattvic food in moderate quantities is the best. Through [this], the sattvic quality of the mind gets enhanced and becomes an aid to self-enquiry.
A sattvic diet is one which is vegetarian and which also excludes stimulating substances - such as chillies, tobacco, alcohol - and food that is excessively sour, salty or pungent.
Some Indian systems of thought maintain that the mind is composed of three fluctuating components called gunas:
(a) sattva, purity or harmony.
(b) rajas, activity.
(c) tamas, inertia or sluggishness.
Since the type of food eaten affects the quality of the mind, non-sattvic foods promote rajas and tamas. The sattvic mind is the most desirable. One of the aims of spiritual practice is to increase the sattvic component at the expense of rajas and tamas.
Question: Is it possible for the vishaya vasanas, which come from beginningless time, to be resolved, and for one to remain as the pure Self?
Although vishaya vasanas, which have been recurring down the ages, rise in countless numbers like the waves of an ocean, they will all perish as meditation on one's real nature becomes more and more intense. Without giving room even to the doubting thought, 'Is it possible to destroy all these vasanas and remain as Self alone?' one should persistently and tightly hold onto meditation on one's real nature. However great a sinner one may be, one should, instead of lamenting, 'Oh, I am a sinner! How can I attain liberation?' completely give up even the thought of being a sinner. One steadfast in meditation on one's real nature will surely be saved.
Question: How long should enquiry be practised? What is non-attachment?
As long as there are vishaya vasanas in the mind, the enquiry 'Who am I?' is necessary. As and when thoughts arise, one should, then and there, annihilate them all through self-enquiry in the very place of their origin. Not giving attention to anything other than oneself is non-attachment or desirelessness; not leaving the Self is jnana [true knowledge]. In truth, these two [non-attachment and desirelessness] are one and the same. Just as a pearl diver, tying a stone to his waist, dives into the sea and takes the pearl lying on the bottom, so everyone, diving deeply within himself in a detached way can obtain the pearl of the Self. If one resorts uninterruptedly to remembrance of one's real nature until one attains the Self, that alone will be sufficient. As long as there are enemies within the fort, they will continue to come out. If one continues to cut all of them down as and when they emerge, the fort will fall into our hands.
Question: Is it not possible for God or the Guru to effect the release of the soul?
God and Guru are, in truth, not different. Just as the prey that has fallen into the jaws of the tiger cannot escape, so those who have come under the glance of the Guru's grace will never be forsaken. Nevertheless, one should follow without fail the path shown by the Guru.
Remaining firmly in Self-abidance, without giving the least scope for the rising of any thought other than the thought of the Self, is surrendering oneself to God. However much of a burden we throw on God, He bears it all. Since the one supreme ruling power is performing all activities, why should we, instead of yielding ourselves to it, think, 'I should not act in this way; I should act in that way'? When we know that the train is carrying all the freight, why should we, who travel in it, suffer by keeping our own small luggage on our heads instead of putting it down and remaining happily at ease?
In the last three sections Bhagavan has used three terms, swarupa dhyanam (meditation on one's real nature), swarupa smaranai (remembrance of one's real nature), and atma chintanai (the thought of the Self) to indicate the process by which one becomes aware of the Self. They should not be understood to mean that one should try to focus one's attention on the Self, for the real Self can never be an object of thought. The benedictory verse of Ulladu Narpadu explains what Bhagavan meant by such terms. It asks the question, 'How to meditate on that reality which is called the Heart?' since that reality alone exists, and it answers by saying, 'To abide in the Heart as it really is, is truly meditating.' That is to say, one can be the Heart by 'abiding as it is', but one cannot experience it as an object of attention.
This interpretation is confirmed by the sentence in the last extract from Who Am I? in which Bhagavan equates atma chintanai (the thought of the Self) with atma nishta (Self-abidance).
In a similar vein Bhagavan remarks later in the essay that 'always keeping the mind fixed in the Self alone can be called self-enquiry'.
Question: What is happiness?
What is called happiness is merely the nature of the Self. Happiness and the Self are not different. The happiness of the Self alone exists; that alone is real. There is no happiness at all in even a single one of the [many] things in the world. We believe that we derive happiness from them on account of aviveka [a lack of discrimination, an inability to ascertain what is correct]. When the mind is externalised, it experiences misery. The truth is, whenever our thoughts [that is, our desires] get fulfilled, the mind turns back to its source and experiences Self-happiness alone. In this way the mind wanders without rest, emerging and abandoning the Self and [later] returning within. The shade under a tree is very pleasant. Away from it the sun's heat is scorching. A person who is wandering around outside reaches the shade and is cooled. After a while he goes out again, but unable to bear the scorching heat, returns to the tree. In this way he is engaged in going from the shade into the hot sunshine and in coming back from the hot sunshine into the shade. A person who acts like this is an aviveki [someone who lacks discrimination], for a discriminating person would never leave the shade. By analogy, the mind of a jnani never leaves Brahman, whereas the mind of someone who has not realised the Self is such that it suffers by wandering in the world before turning back to Brahman for a while to enjoy happiness. What is called 'the world' is only thoughts. When the world disappears, that is, when there are no thoughts, the mind experiences bliss; when the world appears, it experiences suffering.
Question: Is not everything the work of God?
In the mere presence of the sun, which rises without desire, intention or effort, the magnifying glass emits hot light, the lotus blossoms and people begin, perform and cease their work. In front of a magnet a needle moves. Likewise, through the mere influence of the presence of God, who has no sankalpa [intention to accomplish anything], souls, who are governed by the three or five divine functions, perform and cease their activities in accordance with their respective karmas. Even so, He [God] is not someone who has sankalpa, nor will a single act ever touch him. This [untouchability] can be compared to the actions of the world not touching the sun, or to the good and bad qualities of the elements [earth, water, fire and air] not affecting the immanent space.
Sankalpa means 'resolve', 'will', or 'intention'. God has no personal sankalpa. That is to say, He does not decide or even think about what he should do. Though mature devotees 'bloom' on account of his presence, it is not because He has decided to bestow His grace on these fortunate few. His presence is available to all, but only the mature convert it into realisation.
The three divine functions are creation, sustenance and destruction. The five divine functions are these three plus veiling and grace. According to many Hindu scriptures, God creates, preserves and eventually destroys the world. While it exists, He hides His true nature from the people in it through the veiling power of maya, illusion, while simultaneously emanating grace so that mature devotees can lift the veils of illusion and become aware of Him as He really is.
Question: For those who long for release, is it useful to read books?
It is said in all the scriptures that to attain liberation one should make the mind subside. After realising that mind control is the ultimate injunction of the scriptures, it is pointless to read scriptures endlessly. In order to know the mind, it is necessary to know who one is. How [can one know who one is] by researching instead in the scriptures? One should know oneself through one's own eye of knowledge. For [a man called] Rama to know himself to be Rama, is a mirror necessary? One's self exists within the five sheaths, whereas the scriptures are outside them. This self is the one to be enquired into. Therefore, researching in the scriptures, ignoring even the five sheaths, is futile. Enquiring 'Who am I that am in bondage?' and knowing one's real nature is alone liberation.
In self-enquiry one is enquiring into the nature and origin of the individual self, not the all-pervasive Atman. When Self appears in capitals, it denotes Atman, the real Self. When self it appears in lower case, it refers to the individual.
The five sheaths or kosas envelop and contain the individual self. They are:
(1) annamayakosa, the food sheath, which corresponds to the physical body.
(2) pranamayakosa, the sheath made of prana.
(3) manomayakosa, the sheath of the mind.
(4) vijnanmayakosa, the sheath of the intellect.
(5) anandamayakosa, the sheath of bliss.
Sheaths two, three and four comprise the subtle body (sukshma sarira) while the fifth sheath, called the causal body, corresponds to the state of the individual self during sleep.
The individual 'I' functions through the five sheaths. Practitioners of the neti-neti '(not this, not this') type of sadhana reject their association with the five sheaths in the way described in the second paragraph of Who Am I? The idea behind this practice is that if one rejects all thoughts, feelings and sensations as 'not I', the real 'I' will eventually shine in a form that is unlimited by or to the sheaths.
Keeping the mind fixed in the Self at all times is called self-enquiry, whereas thinking oneself to be Brahman, which is sat-chit-ananda [being-consciousness-bliss], is meditation. Eventually, all that one has learnt will have to be forgotten.
One can distinguish different levels of experience in the practice of self-enquiry. In the beginning one attempts to eliminate all transient thoughts by concentrating on or looking for the primal 'I'-thought. This corresponds to the stage Bhagavan described earlier in the essay when one cuts down all the enemies, the thoughts, as they emerge from the fortress of the mind. If one achieves success in this for any length of time, the 'I'-thought, deprived of new thoughts to attach itself to, begins to subside, and one then moves to a deeper level of experience. The 'I'-thought descends into the Heart and remains there temporarily until the residual vasanas cause it to rise again. It is this second stage that Bhagavan refers to when he says that 'keeping the mind fixed in the Self alone can be called self-enquiry'. Most practitioners of self-enquiry will readily admit that this rarely happens to them, but nevertheless, according to Bhagavan's teachings, fixing the mind in the Self should be regarded as an intermediate goal on the path to full realisation.
It is interesting to note that Bhagavan restricts the term 'self-enquiry' to this phase of the practice. This unusual definition was more or less repeated in an answer he gave to Kapali Sastri:
Q: If I go on rejecting thoughts, can I call it vichara [self-enquiry]?
A: It may be a stepping stone. But real vichara begins when you cling to yourself and are already off the mental movements, the thought waves.(8)
The following optimistic answers by Bhagavan, on keeping the mind in the Heart, may provide encouragement to those practitioners who often feel that such experiences may never come their way:
Q: How long can the mind stay or be kept in the Heart?
A: The period extends by practice.
Q: What will happen at the end of that period?
A: The mind returns to the present normal state. Unity in the Heart is replaced by a variety of perceived phenomena. This is called the outgoing mind. The Heart-going mind is called the resting mind.
When one daily practises more and more in this manner, the mind will become extremely pure due to the removal of its defects and the practice will become so easy that the purified mind will plunge into the Heart as soon as the enquiry is commenced. (9)
Bhagavan noted that 'thinking oneself to be Brahman� is meditation', not enquiry. Traditional advaitic sadhana follows the path of negation and affirmation. In the negative approach, one continuously rejects all thoughts, feelings and sensations as 'not I'. On the affirmative route one attempts to cultivate the attitude 'I am Brahman' or 'I am the Self'. Bhagavan called this latter approach, and all other techniques in which one concentrates on an idea or a form, 'meditation', and regarded all such methods as being indirect and inferior to self-enquiry.
Q: Is not affirmation of God more effective than the quest 'Who am I?' Affirmation is positive, whereas the other is negation. Moreover, it indicates separateness.
A: So long as you seek to know how to realise, this advice is given to find your Self. Your seeking the method denotes your separateness.
Q: Is it not better to say 'I am the Supreme Being' than ask 'Who am I?'
A: Who affirms? There must be one to do it. Find that one. Q: Is not meditation better than investigation?
A: Meditation implies mental imagery, whereas investigation is for the reality. The former is objective, whereas the latter is subjective.
Q: There must be a scientific approach to this subject.
A: To eschew unreality and seek the reality is scientific.(10)
Question: Is it necessary for one who longs for release to enquire into the nature of the tattvas?
Just as it is futile to examine the garbage that has to be collectively thrown away, so it is fruitless for one who is to know himself to count the numbers and scrutinise the properties of the tattvas that are veiling the Self, instead of collectively throwing them all away.
Indian philosophers have split the phenomenal world up into many different entities or categories which are called tattvas. Different schools of thought have different lists of tattvas, some being inordinately long and complicated. Bhagavan encouraged his devotees to disregard all such classifications on the grounds that, since the appearance of the world is itself an illusion, examining its component parts one by one is an exercise in futility.
Question: Is there no difference between waking and dream?
One should consider the universe to be like a dream. Except that waking is long and dreams are short, there is no difference [between the two states]. To the extent to which all the events which happen while one is awake appear to be real, to that same extent even the events that happen in dreams appear at that time to be real. In dreams, the mind assumes another body. In both the dream and the waking [states] thoughts and names-and-forms come into existence simultaneously.
The final two paragraphs of the essay are taken from an answer to a question that has already been given:
Question: Is it possible for the vishaya vasanas, which come from beginningless time, to be resolved, and for one to remain as the pure Self?
There are not two minds, one good and another evil. The mind is only one. It is only the vasanas that are either auspicious or inauspicious. When the mind is under the influence of auspicious tendencies, it is called a good mind, and when it is under the influence of inauspicious tendencies, a bad mind. However evil people may appear, one should not hate them. Likes and dislikes are both to be disliked. One should not allow the mind to dwell much on worldly matters. As far as possible, one should not interfere in the affairs of others. All that one gives to others, one gives only to oneself. If this truth is known, who indeed will not give to others? If the individual self rises, all will rise.
If the individual self subsides, all will subside. To the extent that we behave with humility, to that extent will good result. If one can continuously control the mind, one can live anywhere.
http://www.davidgodman.org/rteach/whoami2.shtml
Monday, August 02, 2010
Meditation....and the need to root out vasanas..Ramana
Meditation....and the need to root out vasanas..Ramana.
Ramana Maharshi : The state in which the unbroken experience of existence-consciousness is attained by the still mind, alone is samadhi. That still mind which is adorned with the attainment of the limitless supreme Self, alone is the reality of God.
When the mind is in communion with the Self in darkness, it is called nidra [sleep], that is, the immersion of the mind in ignorance.Immersion in a conscious or wakeful state is called samadhi. Samadhi is continuous inherence in the Self in a waking state. Nidra or sleep is also inherence in the Self but in an unconscious state. In sahaja samadhi the communion is con-tinuous.
Question : What are kevala nirvikalpa samadhi and sahaja nirvikalpa samadhi?
Ramana Maharshi :The immersion of the mind in the Self, but without its destruction, is kevala nirvikalpa samadhi. In this state one is not free from vasanas and so one does not therefore attain mukti. Only after the vasanas have been destroyed can one attain liberation.
Question : When can one practise sahaja samadhi?
Ramana Maharshi : Even from the beginning. Even though one practises kevala nirvikalpa samadhi for years together, if one has not rooted out the vasanas one will not attain liberation.
Question : May I have a clear idea of the difference between savikalpa and nirvikalpa?
Ramana Maharshi : Holding on to the supreme state is samadhi. When it is with effort due to mental disturbances, it is savikalpa. When these disturbances are absent, it is nirvikalpa. Remaining permanently in the primal state without effort is sahaja.
Question : Is nirvikalpa samadhi absolutely necessary before the attainment of sahaja?
Ramana Maharshi : Abiding permanently in any of these samadhis, either savikalpa or nirvikalpa, is sahaja [the natural state]. What is body-consciousness? It is the insentient body plus consciousness. Both of these must lie in another consciousness which is absolute and unaffected and which remains as it always is, with or without the body-consciousness. What does it then matter whether the body-consciousness is lost or retained, provided one is holding on to that pure consciousness? Total absence of body-consciousness has the advantage of making the samadhi more intense, although it makes no difference to the knowledge of the supreme.
Question : Can the meditator be affected by physical disturbances during nirvikalpa samadhi? My friend and I disagree on this point.
Ramana Maharshi :Â Both of you are right. One of you is referring to kevala and the other to sahaja samadhi. In both cases the mind is immersed in the bliss of the Self. In the former, physical movements may cause disturbance to the meditator, because the mind has not completely died out. It is still alive and can, as after deep sleep, at any moment be active again.
It is compared to a bucket, which, although completely submerged under water, can be pulled out by a rope which is still attached to it. In sahaja, the mind has sunk completely into the Self, like the bucket which has got drowned in the depths of the well along with its rope. In sahaja there is nothing left to be disturbed or pulled back to the world. One's activities then resemble that of the child who sucks its mother's milk in sleep, and is hardly aware of the feeding.
Question : How can one function in the world in such a state?
Ramana Maharshi : One who accustoms himself naturally to meditation and enjoys the bliss of meditation will not lose his samadhi state whatever external work he does, whatever thoughts may come to him. That is sahaja nirvikalpa. Sahaja nirvikalpa is nasa [total destruction of the mind] whereas kevala nirvikalpa is laya [temporary abeyance of the mind].
Those who are in the laya samadhi state will have to bring the mind back under control from time to time. If the mind is destroyed, as it is in sahaja samadhi, it will never sprout again. Whatever is done by such people is just incidental, they will never slide down from their high state.
Those that are in the kevala nirvikalpa state are not realized, they are still seekers. Those who are in the sahaja nirvikalpa state are like a light in a windless place, or the ocean without waves; that is, there is no movement in them. They cannot find anything which is different from themselves. For those who do not reach that state, everything appears to be different from themselves.
Question : Is the experience of kevala nirvikalpa the same as that of sahaja, although one comes down from it to the relative world?
Ramana Maharshi : There is neither coming down nor going up - he who goes up and down is not real.In kevala nirvikalpa there is the mental bucket still in existence under the water, and it can be pulled out at any moment. Sahaja is like the river that has linked up with the ocean from which there is no return. Why do you ask all these questions? Go on practising till you have the experience yourself.
Question : What is the use of samadhi and does thought subsist then?
Ramana Maharshi : Samadhi alone can reveal the truth. Thoughts cast a veil over reality, and so it is not realized as such in states other than samadhi. In samadhi there is only the feeling `I am' and no thoughts. The experience of `I am' is `being still'.
Question : How can I repeat the experience of samadhi or the stillness that I obtain here in your presence?
Ramana Maharshi : Your present experience is due to the influence of the atmosphere in which you find yourself. Can you have it outside this atmosphere? The experience is spasmodic(Occurring in spells and often abruptly). Until it becomes permanent, practice is necessary.
Source: from David Godman Excellent Book "Be As You are"
Ramana Maharshi : The state in which the unbroken experience of existence-consciousness is attained by the still mind, alone is samadhi. That still mind which is adorned with the attainment of the limitless supreme Self, alone is the reality of God.
When the mind is in communion with the Self in darkness, it is called nidra [sleep], that is, the immersion of the mind in ignorance.Immersion in a conscious or wakeful state is called samadhi. Samadhi is continuous inherence in the Self in a waking state. Nidra or sleep is also inherence in the Self but in an unconscious state. In sahaja samadhi the communion is con-tinuous.
Question : What are kevala nirvikalpa samadhi and sahaja nirvikalpa samadhi?
Ramana Maharshi :The immersion of the mind in the Self, but without its destruction, is kevala nirvikalpa samadhi. In this state one is not free from vasanas and so one does not therefore attain mukti. Only after the vasanas have been destroyed can one attain liberation.
Question : When can one practise sahaja samadhi?
Ramana Maharshi : Even from the beginning. Even though one practises kevala nirvikalpa samadhi for years together, if one has not rooted out the vasanas one will not attain liberation.
Question : May I have a clear idea of the difference between savikalpa and nirvikalpa?
Ramana Maharshi : Holding on to the supreme state is samadhi. When it is with effort due to mental disturbances, it is savikalpa. When these disturbances are absent, it is nirvikalpa. Remaining permanently in the primal state without effort is sahaja.
Question : Is nirvikalpa samadhi absolutely necessary before the attainment of sahaja?
Ramana Maharshi : Abiding permanently in any of these samadhis, either savikalpa or nirvikalpa, is sahaja [the natural state]. What is body-consciousness? It is the insentient body plus consciousness. Both of these must lie in another consciousness which is absolute and unaffected and which remains as it always is, with or without the body-consciousness. What does it then matter whether the body-consciousness is lost or retained, provided one is holding on to that pure consciousness? Total absence of body-consciousness has the advantage of making the samadhi more intense, although it makes no difference to the knowledge of the supreme.
Question : Can the meditator be affected by physical disturbances during nirvikalpa samadhi? My friend and I disagree on this point.
Ramana Maharshi :Â Both of you are right. One of you is referring to kevala and the other to sahaja samadhi. In both cases the mind is immersed in the bliss of the Self. In the former, physical movements may cause disturbance to the meditator, because the mind has not completely died out. It is still alive and can, as after deep sleep, at any moment be active again.
It is compared to a bucket, which, although completely submerged under water, can be pulled out by a rope which is still attached to it. In sahaja, the mind has sunk completely into the Self, like the bucket which has got drowned in the depths of the well along with its rope. In sahaja there is nothing left to be disturbed or pulled back to the world. One's activities then resemble that of the child who sucks its mother's milk in sleep, and is hardly aware of the feeding.
Question : How can one function in the world in such a state?
Ramana Maharshi : One who accustoms himself naturally to meditation and enjoys the bliss of meditation will not lose his samadhi state whatever external work he does, whatever thoughts may come to him. That is sahaja nirvikalpa. Sahaja nirvikalpa is nasa [total destruction of the mind] whereas kevala nirvikalpa is laya [temporary abeyance of the mind].
Those who are in the laya samadhi state will have to bring the mind back under control from time to time. If the mind is destroyed, as it is in sahaja samadhi, it will never sprout again. Whatever is done by such people is just incidental, they will never slide down from their high state.
Those that are in the kevala nirvikalpa state are not realized, they are still seekers. Those who are in the sahaja nirvikalpa state are like a light in a windless place, or the ocean without waves; that is, there is no movement in them. They cannot find anything which is different from themselves. For those who do not reach that state, everything appears to be different from themselves.
Question : Is the experience of kevala nirvikalpa the same as that of sahaja, although one comes down from it to the relative world?
Ramana Maharshi : There is neither coming down nor going up - he who goes up and down is not real.In kevala nirvikalpa there is the mental bucket still in existence under the water, and it can be pulled out at any moment. Sahaja is like the river that has linked up with the ocean from which there is no return. Why do you ask all these questions? Go on practising till you have the experience yourself.
Question : What is the use of samadhi and does thought subsist then?
Ramana Maharshi : Samadhi alone can reveal the truth. Thoughts cast a veil over reality, and so it is not realized as such in states other than samadhi. In samadhi there is only the feeling `I am' and no thoughts. The experience of `I am' is `being still'.
Question : How can I repeat the experience of samadhi or the stillness that I obtain here in your presence?
Ramana Maharshi : Your present experience is due to the influence of the atmosphere in which you find yourself. Can you have it outside this atmosphere? The experience is spasmodic(Occurring in spells and often abruptly). Until it becomes permanent, practice is necessary.
Source: from David Godman Excellent Book "Be As You are"
Sunday, June 13, 2010
The answer to cognitive dissonance carnalitas.
This is the answer to my question on cognitive dissonance carnalitas.
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This study shows why so called spiritual seekers eat meat and make exuses....cognitive dissonance carnalitas I call it....Here is the answer..........they have defective brains and empathy centres....better give up spirituality and watch extreme fighting and bullfights.....unless they can change their brains through a change to vegetarianism....
Study Shows Vegans Are More Empathetic, Neurologically Speaking.Extract from CARE2...8-June ..2010.Heather Moore.
“Does it baffle you how some people—even seemingly kind, caring people—can watch heart-wrenching videos like "Meet Your Meat," read sobering accounts of dairy farm cruelty, and look at disturbing photos of hens in tiny, crowded cages, yet still eat meat, eggs, and dairy products? Many people seem so indifferent to animal suffering, and even believe that cruel farming practices are justified. Are they horrible people, or are they just not "wired" to feel as much empathy for others?
According to a new study by European researchers, meat-eaters have less empathy—for both animals and people—than vegetarians and vegans do. The researchers recruited 60 volunteers—20 meat-eaters, 21 vegans, and 19 vegetarians—and placed them into an MRI machine while showing them a series of random pictures. The MRI scans revealed that, when observing animal or human suffering, the "empathy-related" areas of the brain are more active among vegetarians and vegans. The researchers even found that there are certain brain areas that only vegans and vegetarians seem to activate when witnessing suffering—animal or human. The vegetarians and vegans also scored significantly higher on an empathy quotient questionnaire than the meat-eaters did.
Now, I'm no neurologist and I don't know anything about brain chemistry, but every article I've read on this subject seems to imply that people who choose to eat a vegan diet do so because they are more capable of making compassionate choices. I'm not bringing this up to make vegans or vegetarians feel self-righteous or superior, but it is something for everyone to keep in mind when you're accused of—or accusing someone of—caring more about “.
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This study shows why so called spiritual seekers eat meat and make exuses....cognitive dissonance carnalitas I call it....Here is the answer..........they have defective brains and empathy centres....better give up spirituality and watch extreme fighting and bullfights.....unless they can change their brains through a change to vegetarianism....
Study Shows Vegans Are More Empathetic, Neurologically Speaking.Extract from CARE2...8-June ..2010.Heather Moore.
“Does it baffle you how some people—even seemingly kind, caring people—can watch heart-wrenching videos like "Meet Your Meat," read sobering accounts of dairy farm cruelty, and look at disturbing photos of hens in tiny, crowded cages, yet still eat meat, eggs, and dairy products? Many people seem so indifferent to animal suffering, and even believe that cruel farming practices are justified. Are they horrible people, or are they just not "wired" to feel as much empathy for others?
According to a new study by European researchers, meat-eaters have less empathy—for both animals and people—than vegetarians and vegans do. The researchers recruited 60 volunteers—20 meat-eaters, 21 vegans, and 19 vegetarians—and placed them into an MRI machine while showing them a series of random pictures. The MRI scans revealed that, when observing animal or human suffering, the "empathy-related" areas of the brain are more active among vegetarians and vegans. The researchers even found that there are certain brain areas that only vegans and vegetarians seem to activate when witnessing suffering—animal or human. The vegetarians and vegans also scored significantly higher on an empathy quotient questionnaire than the meat-eaters did.
Now, I'm no neurologist and I don't know anything about brain chemistry, but every article I've read on this subject seems to imply that people who choose to eat a vegan diet do so because they are more capable of making compassionate choices. I'm not bringing this up to make vegans or vegetarians feel self-righteous or superior, but it is something for everyone to keep in mind when you're accused of—or accusing someone of—caring more about “.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
इ ऍम ठाट I AM THAT.
I AM THAT.
The complete ‘I am’ quotes of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj
By Pradeep
Dedicated to my Guru Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj
Introduction
These quotes have been compiled from seven books that cover almost all the dialogues of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj: I Am That edited by Maurice Frydman, Seeds of Consciousness, Prior to Consciousness and Consciousness and the Absolute edited by Jean Dunn and The Experience of Nothingness, The Nectar of Immortality and The Ultimate Medicine edited by Robert Powell.
Other works that are mostly expositions of his teachings like: The Blissful life by Robert Powell, Pointers from Nisargadatta Maharaj by Ramesh Balsekar, I Am That I Am by Stephen Wolinsky, Song of I Am edited by Jerry Katz and the ASMI – I Am That excerpts compiled and edited by Miguel-Angel Carrasco have not been referred to.
Apart from his teachings, all these texts give a lot of information on Shri Nisragadatta Maharaj. Some other books that may also be of interest are: The Wisdom teachings of Nisargatta Maharaj: A visual journey published by Innerdirections, The Last days of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj published by Yogi impressions and Self Knowledge and Self Realization by Nisargadatta Maharaj, edited by Jean Dunn.
A very useful book is a small one called, Master Key to Self-Realization by Siddharameshwar Maharaj (Nisargadatta Maharaj’s Guru). This is now available as a part of the book, Master of Self-Realization published by Shri Sadguru Trust. The Master Key is an amazing and extremely potent book that lays the foundation of Shri Nisargadattta Maharaj’s teaching. His Guru, Siddharameshwar Maharaj describes in explicit detail the four bodies: Gross body, Subtle body, Causal body and the Supra-Causal body. A step-by-step procedure is described for going through all these bodies and finally transcending them all to reach the final destination, that is the ‘Parabrahman’ or the Absolute. As I understand it, Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj’s primary teaching is to focus on the ‘I am’ which is the root of the Subtle body, after abiding here for a sufficiently long time one just rolls over into ‘I am not’ which is the experience in the Causal body. On this happening, one automatically, without any effort, ‘is’ in the Supra-causal body (‘Turiya’). Now, it is only a step away from the Absolute.
This collection of all the ‘I am’ quotes of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj have been prepared to be used as device to get focused on the ‘I am’. Most of these quotes are as such, while some have been prepared by resorting to concatenations for maintaining the ‘I am’ theme during a dialogue session.
According to me, none of Maharaj’s dialogues require any exposition, anyone with a reasonable amount of intelligence and of course, a deep interest in the subject can understand what he is trying to say. I assume that most of those who use this text have already read all the seven books (or should I say ‘scriptures’) used for these quotes, and if not all at least, I Am That, which is the primary book (scripture).
Let us now, lay aside expositions, and move ahead with execution, which is what Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj wanted us all to do – just abide in the ‘I am’
*******
The complete ‘I am’ quotes of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj
Quote Source Sequence: 1 to 79 : I Am That
80 to 149 : Seeds Of Consciousness
150 to 220 : Prior To Consciousness
221 to 259 : Consciousness and the Absolute
260 to 295 : The Experience of Nothingness
296 to 341 : The Nectar of Immortality
342 to 396 : The Ultimate Medicine
1.Was it not the sense of ‘I am’ that came first? Some seed consciousness must be existing even during sleep, or swoon. On waking up the experience runs: ‘I am-the body- in the world’. It may appear to arise in succession but in fact it is all simultaneous, a single idea of having a body in a world. Can there be the sense of ‘I am’ without being somebody or other?
2.Go deep into the sense of ‘I am’ and you will find. How do you find a thing you have mislaid or forgotten? You keep it in your mind until you recall it. The sense of being, of ‘I am’ is the first to emerge. Ask yourself whence it comes or just watch it quietly. When the mind stays in the ‘I am’, without moving, you enter a state, which cannot be verbalized, but which can be experienced. All you need to do is to try and try again. After all the sense of ‘I am’ is always with you, only you have attached all kinds of things to it- body, feelings, thoughts, ideas, possessions and so on. All these self-identifications are misleading, because of these you take yourself to be what you are not.
3.The ‘I am’ is a useful pointer, it shows where to seek, but not what to seek. Just have a good look at it. Once you are convinced that you cannot say truthfully about yourself anything except ‘I am’, and that nothing can be pointed at, can be your self, the need for the ‘I am’ is over - you are no longer intent on verbalizing what you are. All definitions apply to your body only and to its expressions. Once this obsession with the body goes, you will revert to your natural state. We discover the natural state by being earnest, by searching, enquiring, questioning daily and hourly, by giving one’s life to this discovery.
4.What makes the present so different? Obviously, my presence, I am real for I am always ‘now’, in the present, and what is with me now shares in my reality. The past is in memory, the future – in imagination. There is nothing in the present event itself that makes it stand out as real. A thing focused in the now is with me, for I am ever present, it is my own reality that I impart to the present event.
5.Refuse all thoughts except one: the thought ‘I am’. The mind will rebel in the beginning, but with patience and perseverance it will yield and keep quiet. Once you are quiet, things will begin to happen spontaneously and quite naturally, without any interference on your part.
6.To know the self as the only reality and all else as temporal and transient is freedom, peace and joy. It is all very simple. Instead of seeing things as imagined, learn to see them as they are. When you can see everything as it is, you will also see yourself as you are. It is like cleansing a mirror. The same mirror that shows you the world as it is, will also show you your own face. The thought ‘I am’ is the polishing cloth. Use it.
7.Why not turn away from the experience to the experiencer and realize the full import of the only true statement you can make: ‘I am’. Just keep in mind the feeling ‘I am’, merge in it, till your mind and feeling become one. By repeated attempts you will stumble on the right balance of attention and affection and your mind will be firmly established in the thought-feeling ‘I am’. Whatever you think, say or do, this sense of immutable and affectionate being remains as the ever-present background of the mind.
8.Do not bother about anything you want, or think, or do, just stay put in the thought and feeling, ‘I am’, focusing ‘I am’ firmly in your mind. All kinds of experience may come to you – remain unmoved in the knowledge that all perceivable is transient and only the ‘I am’ endures.
9.No way to self-realization is short or long, but some people are more in earnest and some are less. I can tell you about myself. I was a simple man, but I trusted my Guru. What he told me to do, I did. He told me to concentrate on ‘I am’ – I did. He told me that I am beyond all perceivables and conceivables – I believed. I gave my heart and soul, my entire attention and the whole of my spare time (I had to work to keep family alive). As a result of faith and earnest application, I realized my self (‘swarupa’) within three years. You may choose any way that suits you; your earnestness will determine the rate of progress. Establish yourself firmly in the awareness of ‘I am’. This is the beginning and also the end of all endeavour.
10.To know what you are you must first investigate and know what you are not. And to know what you are not, you must watch yourself carefully, rejecting all that does not necessarily go with basic fact ‘I am’. The ideas: I am born at a given place, at a given time, from my parents and now I am so-and-so, living at, married to, father of, employed by, and so on, are not inherent in the sense ‘I am’. Our usual attitude is ‘I am this’ or ‘that’. Separate consistently and perseveringly the ‘I am’ from ‘this’ or ‘that’ and try to feel what it means to be, just to ‘be’, without being ‘this’ or ‘that’. All our habits go against it and the task of fighting them is long and hard sometimes, but clear understanding helps a lot. The clearer you understand that on the level of the mind you can be described in negative terms only the quicker you will come to the end of your search and realize your limitless being.
11.When you see the world you see God. There is no seeing God apart from the world. Beyond the world to see God is to be God. The light by which you see the world, which is God is the tiny little spark: ‘I am’, apparently so small and yet the first and the last in every act of knowing and loving.
12.All is secondary to the tiny little thing which is the ‘I am’. Without the ‘I am’ there is nothing. All knowledge is about the ‘I am’. False ideas about this ‘I am’ lead to bondage, right knowledge leads to freedom and happiness. The ‘I am’ denotes the inner while ‘there is’ denotes the outer; both are based on the sense of being.
13.The sense of ‘I am’ is your own. You cannot part with it, but you can impart it to anything, as in saying, I am young, I am rich, and so on. But such self-identifications are patently false and the cause of bondage.
14.Give up all questions except one ‘who am I?’ After all the only fact you are sure of is that you ‘are’. The ‘I am’ is certain, the ‘I am this’ is not. Struggle to find out what you are in reality.
15.’I am’ itself is God, the seeking itself is God. In seeking you discover that you are neither the body nor the mind, and the love of the self in you is for the self in all. The two are one. The consciousness in you and the consciousness in me, apparently two, really one, seek unity and that is love. What do you love now? The ‘I am’. Give your heart and mind to it, think of nothing else. This when effortless and natural, is the highest state. In it love itself is the lover and the beloved.
16.The impersonal is real, the personal appears and disappears. ‘I am’ is the impersonal being. ‘I am this’ is the person. The person is relative and the pure being – the fundamental.
17 By focusing the mind on ‘I am’, on the sense of being, ‘I am so-and-so” dissolves; ‘am a witness only’ remains and that too submerges in ‘I am all’. Then the all becomes the One and the One – yourself, not to be separate from me. Abandon the idea of a separate ‘I’ and the question of ‘whose experience?’ will not arise. On a deeper level my experience is your experience. Dive deep within yourself and you will find it easily and simply. Go in the direction of ‘I am’.
18. Cling to the one thing that matters, hold on to ‘I am’ and let go all else. This is ‘sadhana’. In realization there is nothing to hold on to and nothing to forget. Everything is known, nothing is remembered.
19. At the root of everything is the feeling ‘I am’. The state of mind ‘there is a world’ is secondary, for to be I do not need the world, the world needs me.
20.Beyond the mind there is no such thing as experience. Experience is a dual state. You cannot talk of reality as an experience. Once this is understood, you will no longer look for being and becoming as separate and opposite. In reality they are one and separable, like roots and branches of the same tree. Both can only exist in the light of consciousness, which again arises in the wake of the sense ‘I am’. This is the primary fact. If you miss it you miss all.
21.Everything is a play of ideas. In the state free from ideation (nirvikalpa samadhi) nothing is perceived. The root idea is ‘I am’. It shatters the state of pure consciousness and is followed by the innumerable sensations and perceptions, feelings and ideas, which in their totality constitute God and His world. The ‘I am’ remains as the witness, but it is by the will of God that everything happens.
22.The concentration on ‘I am’ is a form of attention. Give your undivided attention to the most important thing in your life – yourself. Of your personal universe you are the center – without knowing the center what else can you know?
23. My advice to you is very simple – just remember yourself, ‘I am’, it is enough to heal your mind and take you beyond, just have some trust. I don’t mislead you. Why should I? Do I want anything from you? I wish you well – such is my nature. Why should I mislead you? Commonsense too will tell you that to fulfill a desire you must keep your mind on it. If you want to know your true nature, you must have yourself in mind all the time, until the secret of your being stands revealed.
24. It is right to say ‘I am’, but to say ‘I am this’, ‘I am that’, is a sign of not enquiring, not examining, of mental weakness or lethargy. Practice (sadhana) consists of reminding oneself forcibly of one’s pure ‘beingness’, of not being anything in particular, not a sum of particulars, not even the totality of all particulars, which make up a universe.
25.Be content with what you are sure of. And the only thing you can be sure of is ‘I am’. Stay with it and reject everything else. This is Yoga.
26 The one witness reflects itself in the countless bodies as ‘I am’. As long as the bodies, however subtle, last, the ‘I am’ appears as many. Beyond the body there is only the One.
27. When I say ‘I am’, I do not mean a separate entity with a body as its nucleus, I mean the totality of being, the ocean of consciousness, the entire universe of all that is known. I have nothing to desire for I am complete forever.
28. Words betray their hollowness. The real cannot be described, it must be experienced. I cannot find better words for what I know. What I say may sound ridiculous. But what the words try to convey is the highest truth. All is one, however much we quibble. And all is done to please the one source and goal of every desire, whom we all know as the ‘I am’.
29. When I repeat: ‘I am’, ‘I am’, I merely assert and re-assert an ever-present fact. You get tired of my words because you do not see the living truth behind them. Contact it and you will find the full meaning of words and of silence- both.
30. Self-remembrance, awareness of “I am’ ripens man powerfully and speedily. Give up all ideas about yourself and simply be. Stop making use of your mind and see what happens. Do this one thing thoroughly. That is all.
31.The fact is you. The only thing you know for sure is: ‘here and now I am’. Remove the ‘here and now’, the ‘I am’ remains unassailable.
32. All I can say is ‘I am’, all else is inference. But the inference has become a habit. Destroy all habits of thinking and sleeping. The sense ‘I am’ is a manifestation of a deeper cause, which you may call self, God, Reality or by any other name. The ‘I am’ is in the world but it is the key which can open the door out of the world.
33.Only your sense ‘I am’ though in the world, is not of the world. By no effort of logic you can change the “I am’ into ‘I am not’. In the very denial of your being you assert it. Once you realize that the world is your own projection, you are free of it. You need not free yourself of a world that does not exist, except in your imagination.
34.The sense ‘I am’ is composed of pure light and the sense of being. The ‘I’ is there even without the ‘am’. So is the pure light there whether you say ‘I’ or not. Become aware of that pure light and you will never lose it. The beingness in being, the awareness in consciousness, the interest in every experience – that is not describable, yet perfectly accessible, for there is nothing else.
35.’I am’ is ever fresh. You do need to remember in order to ‘be’ As a matter of fact, before you can experience anything, there must be the sense of being. At present your being is mixed up with experiencing. All you need to do is to unravel being from the tangle of experiences. Once you have known pure being, without being this or that, you will discern it among experiences, and you will no longer be misled by names and forms.
36. All talk of ‘gnana’ is a sign of ignorance. It is the mind that imagines that it does not know and then comes to know. Reality knows nothing of these contortions. Even the idea of God as the Creator is false. Do I owe my being to another being? Because ‘I am” all ‘is’.
37. My teacher told me to hold on to the sense ‘I am’ tenaciously and not to swerve from it even for a moment. I did my best to follow his advice and in a comparatively short time I realized within myself the truth of his teaching. All I did was to remember his teaching, his face, his words constantly. This brought an end to the mind, in the stillness of the mind I saw myself as I am – unbound.
38.One has to understand that the search for reality, God, Guru and the search for the self are the same, when one is found all are found. When ‘I am’ and ‘God is’ become in your mind indistinguishable, then something will happen and you will know without a trace of doubt that God is because you are, you are because God is. The two are one.
39.When ‘I am myself’ goes the ‘I am all’ comes. When the ‘I am all’ goes, ‘I am’ comes. When even ‘I am’ goes, reality alone is, and in it every ‘I am’ is preserved and glorified.
40. I am now 74 years old. And yet I feel that I am an infant. I feel clearly that in spite of all the changes I am a child. My Guru told me that the child, which is you even now, is your real self (‘swarupa’). Go back to that state of pure being, where the ‘I am’ is still in its purity before it gets contaminated with ‘this I am’ or ‘that I am’. Your burden is of false self-identification – abandon them all. My Guru told me – ‘Trust me. I tell you, you are divine. Take it as the absolute truth. Your joy is divine; your suffering is divine too. All comes from God. Remember it always. You are God, your will alone is done.’ I did believe him and soon realized how wonderfully true and accurate were his words. I did not condition my mind by thinking: ‘I am God, I am wonderful, I am beyond.’ I simply followed his instruction, which was to focus the mind on pure being, ‘I am’ and stay in it. I used to sit for hours together, with nothing but the ‘I am’ in my mind and soon peace and joy and a deep all-embracing love became my normal state. In it all disappeared - myself, my Guru, the life I lived, the world around me. Only peace remained and unfathomable silence.
41.Don’t you see that it is your very search for happiness that makes you feel miserable? Try the other way: indifferent to pain and pleasure, neither seeking, nor refusing, give all your attention to the level on which ‘I am’ is timelessly present. Soon you will realize that peace and happiness are in your very nature and it is only seeking them through some particular channels that disturbs. Avoid the disturbance, that is all. To seek there is no need, you would not seek what you already have. You yourself are God, the Supreme Reality. To begin with, trust me, trust the teacher. It enables you to make the first step - and then your trust is justified by your own experience.
42. The best is the simple feeling ‘I am’. Dwell on it patiently. Here patience is wisdom; don’t think of failure. There can be no failure in this undertaking.
43. No use rebelling against the very pattern of life. If you seek the immutable, go beyond experience. When I say remember ‘I am’ all the time, I mean come back to it repeatedly. No particular thought can be mind’s natural state, only silence. Not the idea of silence but silence itself. When the mind is in its natural state, it reverts to silence spontaneously after every experience, or rather, every experience happens against a background of silence. Now, what you have learnt here becomes the seed. You may forget it – apparently. But it will live and in due season sprout and grow and bring forth flowers and fruits. All will happen by itself. You need not do anything, only don’t prevent it.
44.First know your own mind and you will find that the question of other minds does not arise at all, for there are no other people. You are the common factor, the only link between the minds, Being is consciousness; ‘I am’ applies to all.
45.The ‘I am’ is a thought, while awareness is not a thought; there is no ‘I am aware’ in awareness. Consciousness is an attribute while awareness is not, one can be aware of being conscious, but not conscious of awareness. God is the totality of consciousness, but awareness is beyond all – being as well as non-being.
46. When you follow my advice and try to keep the mind on the notion of ‘I am’ only, you become fully aware of your mind and its vagaries. Awareness being lucid harmony (‘sattwa’) in action dissolves dullness and quietens the restlessness of the mind and gently but steadily changes its very substance. This change need not be spectacular; it maybe hardly noticeable; and yet it is a deep and fundamental shift from darkness to light from inadvertence to awareness.
47.There is the body and there is the Self, between them is the mind, in which the Self is reflected as ‘I am’. Because of the imperfections of the mind, its crudity and restlessness, lack of discernment and insight, it takes itself to be the body and not the Self. All that is needed is to purify the mind so that it can realize its identity with the Self. When the mind merges in the Self, the body presents no problems. It remains what it is, an instrument of cognition and action, the tool and the expression of the creative fire within.
48.The tangle which is entirely below the level of consciousness can be set right by being with yourself, the ‘I am’, by watching yourself in your daily life with alert interest with the intention to understand rather than to judge, in full acceptance of whatever may emerge, because it is there, you encourage the deep to come to the surface and enrich your life and consciousness with its captive energies. This is the great work of awareness; it removes obstacles and releases energies by understanding the nature of life and mind. Intelligence is the door to freedom and alert attention is the mother of intelligence.
49.There must be love in the relation between the person who says ‘I am’ and the observer of the ‘I am’. As long as the observer, the inner self; the ‘higher’ self considers himself apart from the observed, the ‘lower’ self, despises it and condemns it, the situation is hopeless. It is only when the observer (‘vyakta’) accepts the person (‘vyakti’) as a projection or manifestation of himself, and so to say, takes the self into the Self, the duality of ‘I’ and ‘this’ goes and the identity of the outer and the inner, the Supreme Reality manifests itself.
50.There is no ‘I’ apart from the body nor the world. The three appear and disappear together. At the root is the sense ‘I am’. Go beyond it. The idea ‘I-am-not-body’ is merely an antidote to the idea ‘I-am-the-body’, which is false. What is that ‘I am’? Unless you know yourself, what else can you know?
51.All hangs on the idea ‘I am’. Examine it very thoroughly. It lies at the root of every trouble. This ‘I am’ idea was not born with you. You could have lived very well without it. It came later due to your self-identification with the body. It created an illusion of separation where there was none. It made you a stranger in your own world alien and inimical. Without the sense of ‘I am’ life goes on. There are moments when we are without the sense of ‘I am’, at peace and happy. With the return of ‘I am’, trouble starts.
52.It is because the ‘I am’ is false that it wants to continue. Reality need not continue – knowing itself indestructible, it is indifferent to the destruction of forms and expressions. To strengthen and stabilize the ‘I am’ we do all sorts of things – all in vain for the ‘I am’ is being rebuilt from moment to moment. No ambition is spiritual. All ambitions are for the sake of ‘I am’. If you want to make real progress you must give up all ideas of personal attainment.
53.When I met my Guru, he told me:’ you are not what you take yourself to be. Find out what you are. Watch the sense ‘I am’, find you real self’ I obeyed him because I trusted him; I did as he told me. All my spare time I would spend looking at myself in silence. And what a difference it made, and how soon. It took me only three years to realize my true nature. My Guru died soon after I met him, but it made no difference. I remembered what he told me and persevered. The fruit of it is here, with me.
54.All directions are within the mind. I am not asking you to look in any particular direction. Just look away from all that happens in your mind and bring it to the feeling ‘I am’. The ‘I am’ is not a direction. It is the negation of all directions. Ultimately even the ‘I am’ will have to go for you need not keep asserting what is obvious. Bringing the mind to the feeling ‘I am’ merely helps turning the mind away from everything else.
55 Tirelessly I draw your attention to the one incontrovertible factor – that of being. Being needs no proofs – it proves itself. If only you go deep into the fact of being and discover the vastness and the glory, to which the ‘I am’ is the door, and cross the door and go beyond, your life will be full of happiness and light. Believe me, the effort needed is as nothing when compared with the discoveries arrived at.
56.Hold on to the sense ‘I am’ to the exclusion of everything else. When this mind becomes completely silent, it shines with a new light and vibrates with new knowledge. It all comes spontaneously; you need only to hold on to the ‘I am’.
57.Begin with feeling ‘I am’. All else is neither true nor false, it seems real when it appears, it disappears when it is denied. A transient thing is a mystery. The real is simple, open, clear and kind, beautiful and joyous. It is completely free of contradictions. It is ever-new, ever-fresh, and endlessly creative. Being and non-being, life and death, all distinctions merge in it.
58.The teacher tells the watcher you are not this, there is nothing yours in this, except the point of ‘I am’, which is the bridge between the watcher and his dream. ‘I am this’, ‘I am that’ is a dream, while pure ‘I am’ has the stamp of reality on it. You have tasted so many things – all came to naught. Only the sense ‘I am’ persisted – unchanged. Stay with the changeless among the changeful, until you are able to go beyond.
59.First you create a world, then the ‘I am’ becomes a person, who is not happy for various reasons. He goes out in search of happiness, meets a Guru who tells him’ You are not a person, find out who you are’. He does it and goes beyond.
60.He who is beyond time – is the un-nameable. A glowing ember moved round and round quickly enough, appears as a glowing circle. When the movement ceases, the ember remains. Similarly, the ‘I am’ in movement creates the world. The ‘I am’ at peace becomes the Absolute.
61.Immortality is freedom from the feeling: ‘I am’. Yet it is not extinction. On the contrary, it is a state infinitely more real, aware and happy than you can possibly think of. Only self-consciousness is no more. Who would remain even to say ‘I am the witness’? When there is no ‘I am’, where is the witness? In the timeless state there no self to take refuge in.
62.The witness is both unreal and real. The last remnant of the illusion, the first touch of the real. To say: I am only the witness is both false and true, false because of the ‘I am’, true because of the witness. It is better to say: ‘there is witnessing’. The moment you say ‘I am’, the entire universe comes into being along with its creator.
63.Trust the teacher. Take my case. My Guru ordered me to attend to the sense ‘I am’ and to give attention to nothing else. I just obeyed. I did not follow any particular course of breathing or meditation, or study of scriptures. Whatever happened I would turn away my attention from it and remain with the sense ‘I am’, it may look too simple, even crude. My only reason for doing it was that my Guru told me so. Yet it worked! Obedience is a powerful solvent of all desires and fears.
64.Look at the ‘I am’ as a sign of love between the inner and the outer, the real and the appearance. Just like in a dream all is different, except the sense of ‘I’, which enables you to say ‘I dreamt’, so does the sense of ‘I am’ enable you to say, ‘I am my real Self again. I do nothing nor is anything done to me. I am what I am and nothing can affect me. I appear to depend on everything, but in fact all depends on me’.
65. In the immensity of consciousness a light appears, a tiny point that moves rapidly and traces shapes, thoughts and feelings, concepts and ideas, like a pen writing on paper. And the ink that leaves a trace is memory. You are that tiny point and by your movement the world is ever re-created. Stop moving and there will be no world. Look within and you will find that the point of light is the reflection of the immensity of light in the body as the sense ‘I am’. There is only light all else appears.
66.To be the point of light (reflected as the sense ‘I am’) tracing the world is ‘turiya’. To be the light itself is ‘turiyatita’. But of what use are names when reality is so near?
67.The sense of ‘I am’ is both unreal and real. Unreal when I say ‘I am this or that’. It is real when we mean ‘I am not this nor that’. The ‘I am’ and the witness are not one, but without one the other cannot be.
68.Give your heart and mind to brooding over the ‘I am’, what is it, how is it, what is its source, its life, its meaning. It is very much like digging a well. You reject all that is not water, till you reach the life-giving spring.
69 The witness and consciousness appear and disappear together. The witness or the sense ‘I am’ too is transient but is given importance to break the spell of the known; the illusion that only the perceivable is real. Presently for you perception is primary and witnessing secondary, revert it to make witnessing primary and perception secondary (The ‘I am’ is just a device to revert).
70.Look at yourself steadily – it is enough. The door that locks you in is also the door that lets you out. The ‘I am’ is the door. Stay at it until it opens. As a matter of fact, it is open, only you are not at it. You are waiting at the non-existent painted doors, which will never open.
71.Keep the ‘I am’ in the focus of awareness, remember that you ‘are’, watch yourself ceaselessly and the unconscious will flow into the conscious without any special effort on your part. The person merges into the witness, the witness into awareness, awareness into pure being, yet identity is not lost, only its limitations are lost. It is transfigured and becomes the real Self, the ‘sadguru’, the eternal friend and guide. To go deeper, meditation is essential, the striving to go beyond the states of sleep, dream and waking. In the beginning the attempts are irregular, then recur more often, become regular, then continuous and intense, until all obstacles are conquered.
72.All that happens, happens in and to the mind, not to the source of the ‘I am’. Once you realize that all happens by itself (call it destiny, or the will of God or mere accident), you remain as witness only, understanding and enjoying, but not perturbed.
73.Before you can say ‘I am’, you must be there to say it. Being need not be self-conscious. You need not know to be, but you must ‘be’ to know.
74. The subtle body is created with the emergence of the ‘I am’ idea. The two are one. It is momentary. Real when present, unreal when over. Call it empirical, or actual, or factual. It is the reality of immediate experience, here and now, which cannot be denied.
You can question the description and the meaning, but not the event itself. Being and non-being alternate and their reality is momentary. The immutable reality lies beyond space and time. Realize the momentariness of being and non-being and be free from both.
75.The ‘I am’ is at the root of all appearance and the permanent link in the succession of events that we call life; but I am beyond the ‘I am’.
76. All the glories will come with mere dwelling on the feeling ‘I am’. It is the simple that is certain, not the complicated. Somehow, people do not trust the simple, the easy, the always available. Why not give a honest trial to what I say? It may look very small and insignificant, but it is like a seed that grows into a mighty tree. Give yourself a chance.
77.I was taught to give attention to my sense of ‘I am’ and I found it supremely effective. Therefore, I can speak of it with full confidence. But often people come with bodies, brains and minds so mishandled, perverted and weak that the state of formless attention is beyond them. In such cases some simpler token of earnestness (like repeating a ‘mantra’) is appropriate. After all it is the earnestness that is indispensable, the crucial factor. ‘Sadhana’ is only a vessel and it must be filled to be brim with earnestness, which is but love in action. For nothing can be done without love.
78.Delve deeply into the sense ‘I am’ and you surely discover that the perceiving center is universal, as universal as the light that illumines the world. All that happens in the universe happens to you, the silent witness. On the other hand, whatever is done, is done by you, the universal and inexhaustible energy.
79.Theoretically you always have a chance for self-realization. In practice a situation must arise, when all the factors necessary for self-realization are present. This need not discourage you. Your dwelling on the fact of ‘I am’ will soon create another chance. For attitude attracts opportunity. All you know is second-hand. Only ‘I am’ is first-hand and needs no proofs. Stay with it.
80.You have to go within. Whatever great things have happened in nature, however powerful, still they disappear right here. These situations appear and disappear. This is actually abstract, what is solid here is the knowledge ’I am’. The seen and seeing disappear. I tell this only to those who are prepared to listen. Whatever appears is bound to disappear.
81.The greatest appearance is the knowledge ‘I am’. It is invisible before the birth and after the death of the body, and while it is visible it is a solid thing. Many great sages have appeared and disappeared because of the powerful seed ‘I am’.
82 The knowledge ‘I am’ is time bound, all your knowledge sprouts from the concept that you are. This infinitesimal seed contains the universe. You miss the point; you do not understand me properly. This principle ‘I am’ I am telling you about again and again. All questions will be over once you solve the riddle of ‘I am’.
83.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the soul of the entire world. The witness of the knowledge ‘I am’ is prior to the knowledge ‘I am’. Try to understand yourself as you are, do not add any qualifications.
84.The ‘I am’ is the sum total of everything you perceive. It appears spontaneously and disappears, it has no dwelling place. It is like a dream world. Do not try to be something, even a spiritual person. You are the manifested. The tree is already there in the seed. Such is the ‘I am’. Just see it as it is.
85.You are separate from ‘I am’. ‘I am’ is itself an illusion. The knowledge ‘I am’ and the world are tricks of Maya. There is no substance in them. There are no words actually; you speak words for your satisfaction.
86.The ‘I amness’ is pulsating ‘I am, I am’. The feeling of ‘I amness’ is there because of the essence of the food body and vital breath, when these are gone the pulsation of ‘I amness’ will not be there. Beingness goes into no-beingness.
87.Because of the knowledge ‘I am’ we conduct all activities. In the morning when you wake up you get the first guaranty, that conviction of ‘I am’. Then because you are not in a position to sustain or tolerate that ‘I amness’ you bestir yourself. You get up and move around here and there and the activity starts.
88.That attention of ‘I amness’ is always there in the waking state, but we are not alert to watch it. There is no other attention to be followed. Be attentive to that attention ‘I am’.
89.Deal with the knowledge ‘I am’. This ‘I amness’ is there first, isn’t it? – primary. That ‘I’ must be there before you receive this sickness of ‘samskara’ (obstacles). Initially you have to understand that the knowledge ‘I am’ is a product of the food essence. When you know that you are, the world also is.
90.The Guru, God, your own knowledge – these three are one. If you know that, you become quiet Guru means knowledge and knowledge means ‘I am’. The ‘I amness’ is itself the Guru.
91.That state in which you were before you acquired this knowledge ‘I am’ is the real state. Only after you got this knowledge you identified with the body-mind. Whatever you have acquired, including the body-mind, that will go, and it is useless, and that is that. But your original state, before you acquired the body, is the Truth, is the Real state, and it will remain.
92.The beginning and the end of this understanding is the knowledge ‘I am’. The beginning of concepts started with the primary concept ‘I am’. Having wandered through all the concepts, and rejected them, you have to get rid of this last or the first concept.
93. To start with you have to be in that beingness or ‘I am’ without the body sense. You feel that you are the body now but when you abide in that beingness you will know then how you are without the body sense.. But don’t forget, at the same time; that body and the vital breath are very necessary. Once you understand these three entities correctly (body, vital breath and the message ‘I am’), then you are apart.
94.This knowledge ‘I am’ comes to you after your body is born, after that the body of childhood grows on its own and becomes old. What remains in the end is only one thing ‘I am’. So all through life you have to remember to investigate who is this ‘I am’. Otherwise birth and death will have no meaning for your beingness, because that beingness will also be dissolved after the death of the body.
95.To understand more clearly take the example of the dream world. You are in deep sleep and suddenly you feel ‘I am’ and that ‘I amness’ creates a dream world. Similarly this manifest world is created by that ‘I amness’. You will realize this later in the search for truth. The last progress will be for you to transcend this ‘I amness’ and get stabilized in the ultimate.
96.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the first ignorance and whatever knowledge you acquire with it is ignorance. Go back to the source of your ignorance.
97 Whatever is called God or Self is because there is the beingness, the feeling that ‘I am’. That is the fundamental principle, the basis of all your knowledge, but you are identifying yourself with the body.
98. With greatest interest you get absorbed in your Self. By giving attention only to your ‘I’ consciousness you can reach it. Without giving attention to the body but to the sense ‘I am’.
99.The consciousness that has come out of the five elements, through the body, is the quality of beingness, the knowledge that ‘I am’. That state of beingness will perish. There is no necessity for following any particular path, everything is the same. Think of that which is the center of the cosmos, don’t let your attention stray in any way from the knowledge of beingness, ‘I am’. Keep on knowing that ‘I am’ and through this insistence you will know the state you want to reach.
100.Before this knowledge ‘I am’ appeared on you, you were absolutely unattached. As soon as this knowledge dawned on you became attached to everything around you. Only that false ‘I’ is attached. Everything is just happening and that false ‘I’ is taking the credit for doing things.
101 All this conceptual cycle is created by you because you have the concept ‘I am’, which you must eradicate yourself. When you are in deep sleep is there any experience of pleasure and pain or birth and death? What does that mean? It means that concept ‘I am’
has vanished.
102. You must meditate on that ‘I am’ without holding on to the body and mind. As you nursed at your mother’s breast when you were a baby, so must you nurse at this ‘I am’, the knowledge of your beingness. Remember and meditate on this also ‘ I have no fear, I am beyond fear’. I am telling you that this fear will gradually lessen and will go completely, because I say so. The medicine for that fear is my word.
103. The Absolute state does not know itself, but the Absolute is offered and opportunity to understand itself through the food product, the ‘I am’. The very core of all atoms is permeated by that knowledge ‘I am’. Embrace all the atoms of the universe with the feeling that all of them have come inside us in the form of the knowledge ‘I am’.
104.You are so used to support of concepts that when your concepts leave you, although it is your true state, you get frightened and try to cling to them again. This is the meeting point of that immanent principle and the Eternal, the borderland. Why is the intellect puzzled here? That beingness which you are experiencing is melting away. When the concept of ‘I am’ goes, intellect also goes. So the intellect gets that frightening experience of ‘I am going’.
105.When you become one with that knowledge you will realize that the knowledge ‘I am’ is the very Guru of the universe. Don’t make use of anything except the knowledge ‘I am’. Forget everything else. Consider a magnificent tree with many branches and leaves. Go to the root and not the branches.
106. The ‘I am’ connotes the three states, waking, dream and deep sleep. ‘I am’ means that you are these three states, when these are gone the memory is also gone.
107. The appearance of the primary concept ‘I am’ is the beginning of duality. I started counting with myself, before this counting starts. That has no number. That is the Absolute. With that little movement ‘I am’ this counting started.
108. What you must witness is not your thoughts but the consciousness ‘I am’. Everything is an expression of the ‘I am,’ but you are not that; you are prior to the ‘I am’.
109.There is the true Awareness, from which comes consciousness, which is your feeling ‘I am’, be one with your consciousness and that is all that you can do, the Ultimate must come to you. You can only watch what happens – there is nothing you can do to get it.
110. The Guru is the same all-pervading consciousness ‘I am’. The Sat-Guru has gone beyond all these concepts, including the primary concept ‘I am’.
111.There is no proprietor behind that feeling of awareness. It only is, it is beyond description, and words cannot be of any use. That is the permanent state and this manifestation is only its movement. Nobody becomes a ‘Parabrahman’, nobody ‘can’ become a ‘Parabrahman’: It is. Before the knowledge ‘I am’ appeared on you, that is ‘Parabrahman’. If you revert properly, the consciousness ‘I am’ will disappear. There is no movement.
112. When you feel that you are separate from the feeling ‘I am’ isn’t there something or someone who knows that there is a difference? Find out, are you separate unknowingly?
Are we all here because of our volition to be born or has this knowingness appeared in us unknowingly? This beingness has come to you without your knowledge, but you are using it according to your own volition. I want to sentence that inviduality to death. Is it not justice that I pronounce this sentence? So think carefully. The individuality must go. ‘Parabrahman’ is purest justice and Truth.
113.There are various types of charity, but the greatest charity is the renunciation of the knowledge ‘I am’. When you give that up you escape birth and death. Waking state represents activity; deep sleep represents peace, quiet. When these two are present it means ‘I am’ is there, but you the Absolute are neither the waking state, deep sleep nor
‘I amness’.
114.What else is there except the touch of ‘I am’? Why do you worry about discovering Maya and Brahma and all that? Understand what this principle ‘I am’ is and you are finished. That ‘I am’ is in bondage because of concepts.
115 I want to take you to that ‘I am’ concept which is the last outpost of illusion and get rid of it. Understand the quality of these concepts.
116. What capital is available to you? Only that ‘I am’, it is a product of this five-elemental food essence. First you become the consciousness, then you realize that you are manifestation.
117.The Bhagavad-Gita says that we have five senses of knowledge; these are very subtle. More subtle than the senses is the mind, subtler than the mind is the intelligence, and subtler than these is the vital breath. And yet more subtle is ‘He’, the beingness, the ‘I am’.
118. You know you are sitting here. Be attentive to that knowledge only. Just be in your beingness. That knowingness ‘I am’ has created the entire universe. Hold on to that; nothing has to be done. Once you recognize that principle it becomes tranquil. Become one with that and all your needs will be satisfied.
119.I have been very open, very explicit. I’ve been telling you that you are not the body, you are that knowledge only and that vital breath is your conveyance, a tool by which you carry out your activities, and the knowledge ‘I am’ is very subtle. Because of your knowledge, you are and world is.
120. Don’t get involved in anything stay in the consciousness ‘I am’ and don’t go on a intellectual binge again. Consciousness indicates to the consciousness, expounds the knowledge; but you will not dwell there, you embrace the body. The knowledge ‘I am’ tells the knowledge about itself to the ‘I am’ only.
121.You are worrying because of the intellect, but you have only to continue in that ‘I am’ with faith, you have nothing else to do. You are likely to miss that incident if you try to use your intellect. Just let it happen. Hold on to the feeling ‘I am’, don’t pollute that state by holding on to the body sense.
122. Maya is the primary source of illusion. At that point, love for the Self begins: ‘I am’, the love to be. Its expression is all this manifestation.
123. After deep sleep, as soon as consciousness dawns on you of ‘I am’ – that is the witness. Before that moment you did not know that you are, there was no witness, no knowledge of ‘I am’.
124. As long as you identify with the body-mind you are conditioned. Once you stabilize in the knowledge ‘I am’ unconditionally you are the manifest ‘I amness’ – no more an individual. In the manifested state of ‘I amness’ there is no question of your doing, because you are no more an individual. Whatever happens, happens in your consciousness. Whatever happens through this, you also know it will happen, but there is no question of doing or being anything.
125.In the womb that knowingness is ignorant of its existence, the ‘I am’ is not present but the ‘I am’ principle is started there. All things happen unknowingly, but even to understand that is very difficult, it is beyond our comprehension.
126.The first film is when that knowingness appears on you. In that knowledge ‘I am’ all is contained. Only in that film when the film started knowing itself, ‘I am’; then you came to know all this. Did you know anything before?
127.That knowledge ‘I am’ is born out of love, but the illusion has taken such hold of it that love for the ‘I amness’ has gone into the background. To stay with it has become increasingly difficult. Without the manifestation the love was total.
128 You are a man because you identify with the body. If you do not identify with the body, what sex are you? After leaving the body, the vital breath and the ‘I am’ merge into the substratum. Then where is man or woman?
129. In my original true state I have no form and no thoughts. I didn’t know I was, but suddenly another state appeared in which I had a form and thought, ‘I am’. How did this appear? The one who explains how these appearances have come about is the Sat-Guru.
130 Your first step is beingness: embrace the knowledge ‘I am’ be that. I am trying to speak of my most intimate secrets. Just as the dream world, uncalled for, has appeared and you observe it, similarly this world, uncalled for, has appeared and you are compelled to observe it. Just observe. Spontaneously, unknowingly, your beingness has appeared. Knowingly you don’t know ‘ Now I am going to be’; only after the formation of ‘I amness’ do you know ‘I am’.
131.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the film, the destiny. Finally what is our destiny? It is that birth chemical, that film in which everything is recorded and everything is happening. Where are ‘you’ in this?
132.What do you mean by study? That means you are only trying to remember the concepts. What I am saying is that you become concept-free. Put an ax to the concepts, including the concept ‘I am’.
133.This knowledge ‘I am’ has appeared out of love and that love comes out of existence. When this knowledge has dawned on the Self it is absolutely happy but after the child is two or three years old, gradually it gets involved in ‘I’ and ‘mine’, and gradually he loses hold of the joy ‘I am’. The result of this involvement is that he comes to the conclusion that he was born and is going to die.
134.There is no separate God to propitiate and get things done according to our will. Without doing anything you have the knowledge ‘I am’. Immense courage, heroism and conviction that you are – that is ‘ishwara, that is you. I am giving you instructions regarding your beginningless being but you prefer to be that monkey form. You are not prepared to leave that form.
135.The manifestation of the dynamic immanent Spirit is in the form of the guna (quality) ‘I am’, it understands itself as ‘I am’. Then this guna involves itself in the activities in the world through the three gunas. That is the quality.
136. ‘I am’ is a quality, an attribute, indicating beingness, but the Self is not a quality. For that Ultimate Self no worldly knowledge is necessary. Words are not called for. But for the sustenance of this beingness, these words and worldly knowledge is necessary.
137.You are dependant for your living on the strength of your body that it gets from the food you eat and the essence of this food and food body is this consciousness ‘I am’. Your beingness is within you not somewhere else.
138. In the traditional view Brahman is supposed to have created the world, Vishnu to maintain it and Shiva to destroy it. Is not this Brahman who creates the world the same as the Brahma-randhra out of which the sense of ‘I am’ comes? Who is this Brahman other than the ‘I amness’.
139.The sense of ‘I am’ is always there; only when it identifies with the body it is called the ego.
140.The message ‘I am’ does not have any form, design, or color. So long as ‘I am’is, this experience of manifestation is, once that ‘I amness’ disappears there is no experience. Once this message ‘I am’ appears in insect, animal, or human being, immediately the manifestation occurs with that beingness. Inside and outside is full of manifestation. These talks are not for general consumption, for the masses.
141. The message ‘I am’ has no form, it is only a food container. It is there, it has meaning, you cannot perceive it, observe it. The message ‘I am’ is time-bound. The principle to which ‘I am’ refers is beyond time, timeless, eternal.
142.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the same, whether it is an insect, worm, human being or an avatar (being of the highest order); the basic consciousness is the same in all of these.
143. There is no reason why this consciousness came about, but once it comes about, it cannot stand still, consciousness is the same as movement. That movement takes place through the three gunas, which are inherent in this knowledge ‘I am’. All movement takes place through these gunas and this consciousness keeps on humming.
144. Satva is only the essence of the five elements and in that is the knowledge ‘I am’. All that is still of the five elements, so how did this come about? Then my Guru told me, ‘this is what you are’, the whole story; so from my own experience I know that it is all ignorance.
145.My Guru pointed out to me that originally I had nothing to do with all this and all I have with which to solve this mystery of life is the knowledge ‘I am’; without that there is nothing. So I got hold of it, as my Guru told me, and then I wanted to find out how this body aspect came about without my knowledge and how alone on that any other knowledge come about, and that again is a result of five elements. Therefore, whatever anybody thinks he has is sheer ignorance, and I know it from my own experience.
146. If this is ignorance, then where is my beingness? My beingness is in a town which is no-town, in a place which is no-place. How did this come about? Because of this knowledge ‘I am’, which is ignorance. Maya, which came about suddenly, without my asking. Once having come about, this Maya liked what it had created and it wanted that beingness to last for all time. Maya embraced it with such fierceness, that, at any cost, it wants to prolong the existence of that beingness as long as it can.
147.The beingness, the ‘I am’, is merely an instrument, it is not you. It is an instrument of knowledge, and that great instrument of knowledge is called God, which is the quality of the food essence. Out of that alone you will be able to see everything else.
148.One who is completely rid of coming and going, and finally, one who is completely rid of one’s very own concept that ‘I am’, is completely liberated.
149.Brahman means the emanation of the world, simultaneously confirming that ‘I am’. In this Brahman everything is illusion, but who understands that? The principle that understands, realizes, and witnesses is the ‘Parabrahman’. Witnessing happens to the ‘Parabrahman’. In this manifest state everything is ever changing, nothing is permanent, and all is illusion.
150.When you are in deep sleep and you feel that you are awake, the dream world appears simultaneously. With the ‘I am’, the world appears in the waking and dream states.
151.Concepts come into the sense of being ‘I am’ because of the vital breath that causes the mind flow. Mind means words, so thoughts are there – they are the concepts. Look at your root, the child consciousness, and finish it off.
152.It is only during the duration of the beingness that the world and creation is. This power is the faith in the primordial concept ‘I am’, and that is the concept that weaves the web of creation. The entire manifestation is an appearance in this concept.
153. You must come to a firm decision. You must forget the thought that you are the body and be only the knowledge ‘I am’, which has no form, no name. Just be. When you stabilize in that beingness it will give all the knowledge and all the secrets to you, and when the secrets are given to you, you transcend the beingness, and you, the Absolute will know that you are also not the consciousness. Having gained all this knowledge, having understood what is what, a kind of quietude prevails, a tranquility. Beingness is transcended, but beingness is available.
154. On my true, whole, homogenous state just a small ripple appeared, the news came, ‘I am’. That news made all the difference, and I started knowing this; but now I have known my true state, so I understand my true state first, and then I understand that this ripple is coming and going on my true state. While in your case, you take interest in the ripple and don’t take interest in your true state.
155. The consciousness that ‘I am’ has created, and sustains, all the wonders in the world for which men take credit; on the other hand this consciousness has no control over itself. The principle out of which you have sprouted has tremendous powers. Lord Krishna has said, ‘You worship me, be devoted to me’, this means what? The knowledge ‘I am’ which is indwelling in you worship that only.
156. Lord Krishna said ‘All are my expressions’. This knowledge ‘I am’ in each species is myself. The very life force – luminous, bright, radiant, indwelling principle is myself.
157.When you got yourself separated from the Absolute with this identity ‘I am’, you felt fragmented, isolated, and that is why your demands started. In the Absolute there are no needs, Only the Absolute prevails. The truth is total Brahman only, nothing else but Brahman. In a total Brahman state arose the touch of beingness, ‘I am’, and with that, separation started, otherness has come. But this ‘I amness’ is not just a small principle, that itself is the ‘moolmaya’, the primary illusion.
158.If you want to remember this visit, if you have love for me, remember this ‘I am’ principle and without the command or direction of this principle, do nothing.
159.The ‘Maya’ is so powerful that it gets you completely wrapped up in it. ‘Maya’ means ‘I am’, ‘I love to be’, It has no identity except love. That knowledge of ‘I am’ is the greatest foe and the greatest friend. Although it might be your greatest enemy, if you propitiate it properly, it will turn around and lead you to the highest state.
160. Death is considered to be a traumatic experience, but understand what happens. That which has been born, the knowledge ‘I am’, will end. That knowledge, which was limited by this body, will then become unlimited, so what is to be feared?
161.That feeling of love must be understood and then love will unfold itself. Love for the Self, this consciousness, ‘I am’, those who have understood this as the true love, have themselves become love. All has merged in them.
162.This illness that I have got is not separate from what exists as the body, breath and the knowledge ‘I am’. This is one bundle, which has been created; whatever happens is contained in that bundle. I have been separate from it before conception, and will continue to be separate from what has been created.
163.What was conceived has grown physically, and some of the expressions of this knowledge ‘I am’ have achieved tremendous things. At the end of the time span the magnificent personalities, and whatever they have achieved – both have disappeared, however long the time, there is an end to it.
164.What is wrong is that you consider yourself to be limited to this body and shape. What knowledge I try to give is given to the knowledge ‘I am’ in each of you, which is the same. If you try to get the knowledge as an individual you will never get it.
165. That ‘I am’ is a concept is to be understood while the concept is there. Once it merges in the original state, who (or what) is there who wants to know? The illusory entity has disappeared.
166.Whatever I am telling you is not the truth, because it has come out of this ‘I am’. The truth is beyond expression. I am taking you again and again to the source of the spring. Once you go to the source you will come to know there is no water, water is the news ‘I am’.
167.Understand that it is not the individual that has consciousness; it is the consciousness which assumes innumerable forms. That something which is born or which will die is purely imaginary. It is the child of a barren woman. In the absence of this basic concept ‘I am’, there is no thought, there is no consciousness.
168.Any embodied person with the knowledge ‘I am’ carries on his activities in the world with the name only. That inner core, the ‘I am’ has no shackles. Once it is understood that I am that ‘I am’ only, and not this shackled form, then no liberation is called for, that itself is liberation.
169.In this spiritual hierarchy, from the grossest to the subtlest, you are the subtlest. How can this be realized? The very base is that you don’t know you are, and suddenly the feeling of ‘I amness’ appears. The moment it appears you see space, mental space; that subtle sky-like space, stabilize there. You are that. When you are able to stabilize in that space, you are space only. When this space-like identity ‘I am’ disappears, the space will also disappear, there is no space. When that space-like ‘I am’ goes into oblivion, that is the eternal state, ‘nirguna’, no form, no beingness. Actually, what did happen there? This message ‘I am’ was no message. Dealing with this aspect, I cannot talk much because there is no scope to put it in words.
170.Most essential is that knowledge ‘I am’. Claim it, appropriate it as your own. If that is not there, nothing is. Knowledge of all stages will be obtained only with the aid of this knowledge ‘I am’ From the Absolute no-knowing state, spontaneously this consciousness ‘I am’ has appeared – no reason, no cause.
171.This passing show maybe likened to the following situation: suppose I was well all along, then suddenly I was sick and the doctor gave me medicine. After three days my fever was gone. So this stage of fever for three days is the ‘I am’ consciousness. Exactly like that – a passing show, a time-bound state.
172. The knowledge ‘I am’ is not a thought but observes thought. The innermost, subtlest principle is that gnawing principle ‘I am, I am’ without words, by which you know you are. It has no form or image; it is only beingness, the love to be.
173.The ‘I am’ and the Absolute are not two. In the Absolute the ‘I amness’ comes and then the experience takes place. Whatever is happening, from the Absolute standpoint, without the knowledge ‘I am’, is very profound, unlimited, and expansive
174. Investigate that concept ‘I am.’ In the process of trying to find out your identity or this spiritual search, all will happen in the realm of this consciousness. You finally stumble on, or culminate into the Absolute ‘Parabrahman’ state, which is desireless.
175.Before the idea ‘I am’ sprouted, you are, but you don’t know you are. Subsequent to that there have been many happenings with which you have started decorating yourself. You try to derive the meaning of yourself out of subsequent words, happenings, and the meaning of words…that is not you…give it up. You are prior to the idea ‘I am’. Camp yourself there, prior to the words ‘I am’.
176.From deep sleep to the waking state, what is it? It is the ‘I am’ state with no words, later the words start flowing and you get involved with the meaning of the words and carry out your worldly life with the meaning of those words – that is the mind. But before the ‘I am’ and waking state, that borderline, there you have to be.
177. At most I would say ‘ you worship that ‘I am’ principle, be one with it and that would disclose all the knowledge’ That’s all I will say, but the subtlest part is this, from deep sleep to waking state. To abide in that you must have an intensely peaceful state. In that state witnessing of the waking state happens. You must go to that limit, but it is very difficult.
178.If you have regard for me remember my words. The knowledge ‘I am’ is the greatest God, the Guru, be one with that, be intimate with it. That itself will bless you with all the knowledge relevant for you in the proliferation of that knowledge, it will lead you to the state which is eternal.
179. What is this knowingness? It is the stamp or registration of the booking ‘I am’. You are booking a flat, which is under construction but where is the flat? It is only the booking. Similarly this ‘I am’ is only booking, it represents your Absolute state.
180. Discrimination is very necessary to understand what I am saying. It is only after the arrival of consciousness that we try to understand ourselves. Consciousness is the so-called birth, birth means the three aspects: waking state, deep sleep and the knowledge ‘I am’. Once I understand what this birth is, then the whole mystery is solved. Since I have thoroughly known what this birth principle is, I will know very well at that happening of so-called death. I shall observe the departure of the vital breath, the language and the ‘ I amness”, there is no question of death.
181.Who is going to give you eternal peace? It is only the sun, that ‘I am’. If you embrace that Self-effulgent sun everything else will go, but you will prevail eternally.
182.All your experiences and visions depend on your knowledge ‘I am’ and this itself is going to dissolve. For this knowledge there are no customers, no devotees, because they want something concrete in their hand, but when your knowingness itself is going to dissolve, is it possible to hold on to something?
183. You live in the house but the house is not yourself. Similarly the knowledge ‘I am’ is in the body, but it is not the body. When the knowledge ‘I am’ is not there do you perceive or observe anything?. Knowingness is knowledge and no-knowingness is also knowledge, but it has no form. Call that knowledge ‘I am’ as your Self; don’t call the body as knowledge. The knowledge ‘I am’ is the primary God, meditate on that only.
184.All those praises sung by the ‘Vedas’ are only for that tiny little pinch ‘I am’. The moment you start making a design of that ‘ I amness’ you are getting into deep waters. This incense holder is silver; you have the knowledge that it is silver. What is the shape, color, or design of that knowledge? If all knowledge is formless, could there be a form, design or color to the knowledge ‘I am’? Could it be subject to sin or merit?
185.I never seek anything from anybody else. Whatever I want to get, I want to get out of my own being, I worship that very principle ‘I am’ and demand what I want out of that; because of that all these things are coming.
186 In this process you, as an individual, are not left at all. Try to understand that ‘I am’ is a product of the ‘satwa guna’, food essence product. When you throw out all the concepts, including your primary concept (‘I am’), then whatever is, is. Stay put in quietude.
187. All this profound talk is nothing but mental entertainment. As you go further into spirituality you will realize that ‘I am’ is the very God or soul of an infinite number of universes, but the ‘I am’ is again entertainment. All my talks are conceptual entertainment.
188.In the first few years the primary concept ‘I am’ was there, but in a dormant condition. Later on it started knowing itself. The ‘jnani’ state is like the child, when the child was not knowing itself. The apparatus through which that knowingness expresses itself is now quite different, but the principle is the same.
189.The world of ‘Maya’ is built up of concepts only. I cannot charge the world with giving me the pain; the whole cause of the pain is the knowingness ‘I am’. When this knowledge was not there was there any pain or pleasure?
190.All your moments of spirituality are based on the ‘I am the body’ idea. This knowledge ‘I am’ is going to remain for a short period. This will be very clear to you when you remain in your real position. Until then accept whatever concepts of spirituality you like. Until you know your true state you will accept all the hearsays because you don’t know the truth.
191 You must maintain this knowledge ‘I am’ in proper order. All the dirt, which is not the towel, should be removed. Similarly ‘I am’ is the tool through which you get all the knowledge. You worship that ‘I am’, remove all the adulteration, the dirt.
192. That knowingness alone points out all the dirt which is imposed on it. Even the space is not as pure as the knowledge ‘I am’. Innately the world is very pure, it is rendered dirty because you identify with the body. Since you do not recognize your ‘I amness’ in its purity, you refer to various books and saints to get an identity.
193. To know these senses, to understand these secrets, you surrender to that very principle ‘I am’, and that consciousness alone will lead you to this. Presently stabilize in the consciousness. If you don’t do that, your very concepts will be very dangerous to you – they will throttle you to death. The knowledge you are the is very source of all energy, the source of all Gods, of all types of knowledge. This is the simplest method, you know you are, just be there.
194.You came here and I talk to you but I am not concerned whether you come or go. I am totally independent. I, as the Absolute, do not need the consciousness. Total independence is merely to apprehend and understand. My apparent dependence is on this consciousness which says ‘I am’. It is this sentience which enables me to perceive you. This concept I did not have but even then I existed. I was there before this consciousness appeared.
195. When did this process of observing start? It started with the arrival of the waking state, deep sleep state and the knowledge ‘I am’, all rolled into one ‘I am’. This is known as birth. With the so-called birth this triad has come, and with its arrival observation started. Everyday it is going on. The moment the ‘I amness’ comes it is being used for experiencing, observing etc. Prior to the happening of this birth, where was the ‘I amness’? It was not there.
196.You know you are. Because you know you are, everything is happening. Go to that knowledge ‘I am’. When you understand what that ‘I amness’ is, then the shell of mystery is broken.
197.Pose the question from the standpoint that you are only the knowledge ‘I am’. The primary ignorance is about our ‘I amness’; we have taken it as the Ultimate, that is ignorance. We presume that this consciousness is the eternal, the Ultimate, that is the mistake. This ‘I am’ principle is there provided the waking state and deep sleep are there. I am not the waking state, I am not the deep sleep – therefore I, the Absolute, am not that ‘I am’. Leave aside this triad, what are you? Understand clearly, when you keep aside the very instrument of questioning, where is the question? Which you? You have removed the ‘you’.
198. I repeatedly tell you that there is nothing save this consciousness, the knowledge ‘I am’ – if you feel like worshipping something, worship that. I am giving blessings. Blessings mean what? I am giving confidence and courage.
199.Can any of your concepts grasp the total, the Ultimate? Have you understood that knowledge itself is ignorance? If it were real it would have been there eternally – it would not have had a beginning and an end. Now the experience ‘I am’ is felt, earlier that experience was not. When it was not, no proof was called for, but once it is, lots of proof is required.
200. One is the Absolute, two is consciousness, three is space. Where there was no knowledge ‘I am’ that is number one, later on there is the sense ‘I am’ that is number two, then there is space – number three.
201.Increase the conviction that you are the formless consciousness. You develop your firm conviction that you are the total manifesting universal consciousness. There is nobody who can have the knowledge of the Truth, the Eternal. It is one’s eternal true state, but is not a knowledgeable state – you cannot know It. So-called knowledge is boundless and plenty in the state of attributes, ‘I am’. In this body is the knowledge ‘I am’. When the body drops down, the knowledge ‘I am’ will subside there only – what remains is the Absolute.
202.Be one with the knowledge ‘I am’, the source of sentience, the beingness itself. If you are seeking that peace which is priceless, it can only be in establishing yourself in the consciousness with steadfast conviction. By conviction I mean never doubted, firm, unshakable, never wavering – have that kind of conviction in your beingness. Think of nothing else, pray to nothing else, ‘Atma Prem’, because of it everything is.
203.In that body the ‘I am’ is ticking – that is the Guru. You worship that ‘I am’ principle and surrender to that Guru and that Guru will give all the grace. What you call ‘I am’ and birth, you are not that, it is material. The Ultimate knowledge does not have any knowledge. This knowledge ‘I am’ has appeared spontaneously, as a result of the body. See it as it is, understand it as it is.
204.This ‘I am’ is a concept also, is it not? And you want to hang on to this concept also. This ‘I amness’ is not going to remain in your association, and when it goes, everything relating to that ‘I amness’ goes. When this is the state of affairs, what is the use of trying to gain or assimilate knowledge? You are standing on a concept ‘I am’ and trying to paint that with another concept.
205.I have experienced all four kinds of speech and transcended them. Rarely will anybody follow this hierarchy to stabilize in the consciousness and transcend consciousness. Starting from ‘Vaikhari’ (word), normally we listen to words; from ‘Vaikhari’ we go to ‘Madhyama’ (mind-thought); in watching the mind we are in ‘Pashayanti’ where the concept formation takes place and from there to ‘Para’ (‘I am’ – without words), and finally from ‘Para’ to prior to consciousness. This is the line to follow, but only a rare one follows it – receding, reversing.
206. You must possess that confirmation that you are formless, designless and not only rely on meditation. Always insist on that you are formless, free and not conditioned. You must hammer on this constantly, that is the practice. You must have a strong conviction that conviction means practicing. That conviction means not only ‘I am’ but it means I am free from the ‘I am’ also.
207.Normally in the name of spirituality, knowledge is expounded. Knowledge is in the realm of five elements and it is talked about as real or unreal so long as the knowledge ‘I am’ is there, it is a product of the knowledge ‘I am’. A ‘jnani’ is that state from which the witnessing of the knowledge ‘I am’ takes place. In that ‘jnani’ state there is no touch of ‘I amness’ (it is a quality-less state) and it is not knowledge – knowledge means ‘I amness’.
208. ‘I am’ is only a few letters. Has anyone been able to keep this ‘I am’ in his pocket for all time? If whoever feels that ‘I am’ had knowledge, would he have cared to become this ‘I am’? No, he would have said ‘I don’t want this consciousness’. You are unreal – you know that you are – that is also unreal. This sense of presence is an untruth, it is like a dream.
209. The ‘Linga-deha’ is the seed, the chemical, the product of the five elemental essences which give rise to and sustain the consciousness ‘I am’. Just like the seed of a tree, that seed latently contains all future manifestations and expressions of the tree that will sprout out of the seed. You take a fountain pen and on the paper you put a drop of ink, so that drop is the ‘Linga-deha’. That drop is the moment of conception; its expression is the thought-free state, like space, in the knowingness state. That ‘Linga-deha’, that little drop, and the knowledge ‘I am’ is the same.
210.It is not important where you are, once you are established in the ‘I am’. It is like space – it neither comes nor goes; just as when you demolish the walls of a building only space remains.
211.If you do not have the knowledge ‘I am’ who is going to seek? You must be, only then the search can begin. Remember the knowledge ‘ I am’ – that alone pervades everything – be only that and give up the rest.
212.At the moment of death it is the culmination or termination of the Self-experience, ‘I am’. After the termination of ‘I amness’ there is no experience of knowingness or not knowingness, the knowingness is a quality of the material stuff.
213.All this knowledge has dawned on me, I am not the knowledge. The knowledge ‘I am’, and all its manifestations, are understood. In understanding, I am not That.
214.To establish oneself firmly in the awareness ‘ I am’, it is not necessary to think ‘ I am’, ‘I am’. Is it necessary to think you are sitting here? You know that you are sitting here. Whatever name and form there is belongs to that material and that material is not you. Do you analyze the problem and with the firm conviction decide that you are not the material? When the material disintegrates what does the name refer to? Does it have any significance? Only one in ten million goes to the crux of the matter, analyzes what it is, comes to a conclusion, and gets liberated, all by himself. The one who gets liberated is the consciousness, there is no entity.
215. As long as you are wearing this concept ‘I am’ you will be involved with all the concepts. When this concept ‘I am’ departs there will be no memory left that ‘I was’ and ‘I had’ those experiences; the very memory will be erased.
216. All this process of communication, expounding, etc., will go on so long as this conscious presence is available, and all this is to merely satisfy the concept ‘I am’, and you the Absolute, are not the primary concept ‘I am’.
217.That which you like most – that itself is ‘I am’, the conscious presence – but that is not going to last forever. When the body drops off and the consciousness is extinguished, you need to do nothing. With this understanding do what you like in the world.
218.The only spiritual way to understanding you true nature is to find out the source of this concept ‘I am’. Before the sense of presence arrived I was in that state in which the concept of time was never there. So what is born? It is the concept of time, and that event which is birth, living, and death together constitute nothing but time, duration.
219.When you are the space you are no more the body, but whatever is contained in that space you are. You are now manifest – whatever is known – the space. This space is known as ‘chidakash’. In ‘chidakash this knowingness is ‘I am’. In the highest ‘Paramakash’ there is no is or is not, It transcends everything.
220.The Guru tells you ‘Get rid of concepts, just be yourself’. The seeker having understood what the Guru said, gets rid of the concepts, and now, as the first step, the seeker dwells in the state ‘I am’, just being. First of all there is the knowingness ‘I am’, without words, with that knowingness the world is. Now when the seeker goes into meditation that knowingness goes into no-knowingness. This is the highest state in the hierarchy when the body aspect is there because this knowing and no-knowing are aspects of the body, and body means consciousness, and in the realm of consciousness, knowingness and no-knowingness exist. The Absolute transcends knowingness and no-knowingness. So, no-knowingness is the highest in the hierarchy of spirituality, and the destination is the transcendence of knowingness and no-knowingness.
221.You must know what this ‘I am’ principle is. It appears spontaneously and with its appearance begins the riddle of conceptual life.
222.In deep sleep, consciousness was in a dormant condition, there were no bodies, no concepts, no encumbrances. Upon the arrival of this apparently wakeful state, with the arrival of the concept ‘I am’, the love of ‘I am’ woke up. That itself is ‘Maya’, illusion.
223.The emergence of this beingness itself constitutes time. Everything is beingness, but I, the Absolute, am not that. In meditation there was space, when suddenly two forms appeared out of no-form, ‘Prakriti’ and ‘Purusha’ and the quintessence of these forms was the knowledge ‘I am’.
224.There are no individuals; there are only food bodies with the knowledge ‘I am’. There is no difference between and ant, human being and ‘Iswara’ they are of the same quality. The body of an ant is small; an elephant’s is large. The strength is different, because of size, but the life-force is the same. For knowledge the body is necessary.
225.When this beingness goes, the Absolute will not know ‘I am’. Appearance and disappearance, birth and death, these are qualities of beingness; they are not your qualities.
226.Who is talking?, who is walking?, who is sitting? These are the expressions of the chemical ‘I am’. Are you that chemical? You talk about heaven and hell, this Mahatma or that one, but how about you? Who are you? You are not this chemical ‘I am’.
227. Not an individual but the knowledge ‘I am’ must go to its source. Out of the no-being state comes the beingness. It comes as quietly as twilight, just a feel of ‘I am’ and then suddenly the space is there. In the space, the movement starts with the air, the fire, the water, and the earth. All these five elements are you only. Out of your consciousness all this has happened. There is no individual. There is only you, the total functioning is you, the consciousness is you.
228.Ultimately one must go beyond knowledge, but the knowledge must come, and knowledge can come by constant meditation. By meditating, the knowledge ‘I am’ gradually settles down and merges with universal knowledge, and thereby becomes totally free, like the sky or the space. It is not possible for you to acquire knowledge, you ‘are’ knowledge. You are what you are seeking.
229. How amusing it is to see someone who thinks of himself as an individual, who thinks of himself as a doer or achiever. Whatever is happening and the experiencing of the happening, takes place in this consciousness when the ‘I am’ arises.
230.Get to know that ‘I am’ without words, which arises in the morning. Knowing the Self, abiding in the Self-knowledge, is not a mere intellectual knowing. You must be that, and you should not move away from it. Remain firm.
231.In the body the indwelling principle is the consciousness. Abiding in the consciousness, it became all manifestation. Now transcendence of the consciousness has also occurred. With the appearance of consciousness, the Absolute knows it is, ‘I am’. This is the experience. There are other experiences now, in this time factor, but experiences are gradually dropping off, including this primary experience ‘I am’. It is only the consciousness that is going to disappear; the Absolute is always there.
232.Because the ‘I am’ principle is there, it is moving all over. To recognize it, you put on various uniforms in order to give it identity, but the principle is already there, and because of that principle you are engaging in various activities. Unless you wear the uniform (the body) you will not be able to conduct any activities. Once you discard this ‘I amness’ uniform, what remains is the ‘Parabrahman”. That which is eternally current is the ‘Parabrahman’.
233.In this body is the subtle principle ‘I am’, that principle witnesses all this. You are not the words. Words are the expression of space, they are not yours. Still further you are not that ‘I am’
234. When you began knowing that you are, you did a lot of mischief, but when the ‘I am’ is not there, there is no question of mischief.
235. The ‘I am’ is absent only in the state of ‘samadhi’, when the self merges in the Self. Otherwise it will be there. In the state of a realized person the ‘I am’ is there, he just doesn’t give much importance to it. A ‘jnani’ is not guided by a concept.
236.This body is like an instrument that says ‘I am’, like an announcer. Presently you think you are the body-mind, and whatever concepts you have gathered are flowing out. When you begin spirituality, you reject the body-mind with ‘I am not that’. Then you come to the ‘I am’ only, without words. Then you are everything; you are not confined to the body.
237.The riddle of spirituality cannot be solved by the intellect. At the most, your intellect can provide you with livelihood. Whatever you try to become, that is not you. Before the words come out, before you say ‘I am’, that is you. You must be concerned with only yourself. Don’t worry about anybody else. What are you?
238.The capacity of consciousness is something astounding. I didn’t know I was, and then suddenly I knew ‘I am’. This ‘I amness’ is the power of ‘Maya’.
239.What is the most ingrained habit you have? It is to say ‘I am’. This is the root habit. Words and experiences are unworthy of you. This habit of experiencing will not go until you realize that all this is the domain of five elements, and the experiences in the five elements, are unreal. This ‘I amness’ itself is unreal.
240.You must give up the identity with the body. Abidance in that knowledge ‘I am’ which does not identify with the body-mind is the spiritual light. Self-love and ‘I am’ without words are the same. The sickness may come and go, but the self-love does not go.
241.Until you recognize and completely identify yourself with the knowledge ‘I am’, you will identify with the body. When one disidentifies with the body, one transcends not only the body but consciousness as well, since consciousness is a product of the body. The consciousness no longer says ‘I am’, ‘I am’.
242. When you were unaware of this message of ‘I am’ how did you function? The question I put, nobody can answer. All of your great scholars, people with a lot of knowledge, have gone into quietude.
243.That state of being is common to all, that is the message ‘I am’ without words. Change is only in the mind-flow. All the studies you are doing are in the realm of mind-flow. The sense of ‘I am’ is present because of your birth, through which you encounter many thoughts and concepts, always changing. Presently the message ‘I am’ is constant.
244. The body is not you, the name is not you. The body is the food you have consumed; the taste of it is the knowledge ‘I am’. That is Self, the feeling ‘I am’, that is the love to be. How amazing, how incredible, it has no name, but you give many names to it. It is the Self, the love to be. That love to be is all pervading. Before you conceptualize anything, you are, even before the knowingness, you are.
245. You are afraid because you have assumed something as ‘I am’, which actually you are not. Suppose you find a diamond ring on the road and you pocket it. Since it is not yours, a fear overcomes you. When you put on an identity that is not yours, you are afraid. When you are the pure ‘I amness’ only, there is no fear. Presently you are this ‘I am’, but this ‘I am’ is not the truth. Whatever you are prior to the appearance of ‘I am’, that is your real nature.
246. Don’t roam about, don’t come here either. Abide in quietude, peace, stability. Here we are not engaged in any buying or selling. That knowledge ‘I am’, without concepts, is evoked or stimulated by the consciousness and peace which emanate from this place.
247.You did not have the concept ‘I am’ in the course of the nine months in the womb. Understanding this state of affairs, the concept ‘I am’ comes spontaneously and goes spontaneously. Amazingly, when it appears, it is accepted as real. All subsequent misconceptions arise from the feeling of reality in the ‘I amness’. Try to stabilize in the primary concept ‘I am’, in order to lose that and with it all other concepts. Why am I totally free? Because I have understood the unreality of that ‘I am’.
248. If you sit here quietly, being one with the knowledge ‘I am’, then you are not concerned with the world or what goes on in the world. It is only when the consciousness starts operating and there are various movements in the consciousness that the behavior in the world takes place. When I am not conscious of the existence of the body, experiences are not registered.
249.The ‘mumukshu, is in kindergarten, spiritually inclined, but identifying with the body-mind. The ‘sadhaka’ is one who has dis-identified with the body-mind. A ‘siddha’ is one who has stabilized in the knowledge ‘I am’, and in the process, has transcended it. In this journey you very well know where you are.
250.The core of this consciousness is knowingness, to know ‘I am’. It is not a personality, not an individual. It is total manifestation. Beingness is there, it fills everything. Nevertheless, this quality ‘I am’ is the result of the material, objective body. In the seed the whole tree is latent. In the droplet ‘I am’ all three worlds are squeezed in.
251. The highest state is the state of a ‘jnani’. The first step is to be that droplet (‘I am’). In the process of knowing that droplet, you are out of it, and that is a ‘jnani’. A ‘jnani’ is not obsessed by any calamities or any problems, because he has transcended the ‘I am’ principle. He watches the play as a witness.
252. The whole universe is experienced in the consciousness ‘I am’. If that is not there, what else can ever exist? This consciousness is beating a drum; everyone is carried away by the noise of the drum. Who looks for the drummer? Who is sounding and beating the drum? It is so amazing that no one casts even a glance at this speck of consciousness.
253. The habit of considering Self as body has influenced everybody too much. The knowledge ‘I am’ is your Guru. Be in it.
254. The letters ‘I am’ are written spontaneously with a certain ink. What is that ink which was used to write that which you are? In that ink with which the letters ‘I am’ were written, in that ink of the title of ‘Tej Sesh Bhagavan’ is confirmed by the ‘Vedas’. ‘Sesh’ means the leftover, the remains. That ‘Tej Sesh Bhagavan’ has come spontaneously and will spontaneously go. The firm conviction that I am this, the three states – waking state, deep sleep and the knowledge ‘I am’ – are the aspects of that ‘Tej Sesh Bhagavan’. You are not that.
254.Worship the knowledge ‘I am’ as God, as your Guru. Do you see the image of yourself in the mirror first, or do you know you are prior to that? Which is first? If you are not, can you see your image in the mirror? Give up trying to evaluate the real I or the counterfeit I, but associate with the ‘Brahman’, I am the ‘Brahman’.
255.The message ‘I am’ is there. The mind flow is also there; it is not a personality, it is the consciousness. The very idea that you are the body is ridiculous; the consciousness is experiencing its manifestation. A rare being will realize this.
256.The Ultimate you can never be lost; whatever you have lost, you have lost only words. The Ultimate you knows or feels ‘I am’ without words. Through this ‘I am’ comes the world knowledge. You are not in isolation, you are part and parcel of the world knowledge.
257. Presently the feeling that you are is also memory. To sustain that memory of ‘I am’, all these raw materials are necessary. You are not that ‘I am’. You are as the Absolute, prior to this ‘I am’.
258. One cannot see rays of light, as such; they reflect only when they encounter another object. Similarly ‘I amness’ is the interruption because of these five elements and three ‘gunas’. That is why the feeling ‘I am’ is felt; but without the feeling of ‘I am’, still you are.
259. Start with the body. From the body you get the knowledge ‘I am’. In this process you become more and more subtle. When you are in a position to witness the knowledge ‘I am’, you have reached the highest. In this way you must try to understand, and the seeds of knowledge will sprout in you.
260.Now what is it that we are concerned with? We are dealing with the physical form, which is made up of, and fed by, the five elements. In that form are operating the life force (the vital breath) and this consciousness that is, the knowledge ‘I am’ or the sense of being, the sense of existence. The latter is the ‘sentience’, which is the gift of the consciousness.
261. Each of must say ‘I am’ and realize it. There is no ‘you’, and there is no ‘me’, as individual entities. Until the ‘I am’ thought was there, there was no manifestation; both came about simultaneously.
262.This knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, has come out of the prior state when there was no consciousness. The consciousness is a state which is now with us and because of which we suffer; and before this consciousness came, a state prevailed when we were not conscious and which was a happy state.
263. Guru means the ‘I amness’ itself, which always reminds you ‘I am’, ‘I am’, ‘I am’ – that is guru-guru-guru, like the sound of a motorcar starting. It is a continuous reminder that you are.
264.Is it necessary that you should remember that you are (‘I am’)? Spontaneously you know and remember that you are. That is why you have come here, have you not? Because you are. Stay put there.
265. In order to not mistakenly hold on to something as ‘I am’ don’t say I am this, I am that; just hold on to yourself, you are, just be. Just be ‘you are’. Do you follow?
266.You are the knowledge ‘ I am’. So if you want to worship, worship that knowledge ‘I am’. Be devoted to that ‘I amness’ only. When you do that, all other rituals become redundant, useless. Finally when you realize that everything is useless, everything is ‘Brahman’, it means you are at the ‘Parabrahman’ level, the absolute level. When at that level, you will envision everything as useless, including the ‘Brahman’ because the ‘Brahman’ is also reduced to illusion. Therefore all these talks, including my own will be reduced to illusion when you reach the highest.
267.The one who abides in that principle by which he knows ‘I am’, he is the manifest. He abides in that manifest ‘Brahman’ all the twenty-four hours. Whether the body remains or not, that manifest self-principle always remains. You must continually remember, ‘chew the cud’, that the knowledge ‘I am’ signifies knowing all gods, all the ‘Vedas’ it is the ‘Brahman’ only. You must continually think about it. And should in the course of such reminiscing, the body drop off, then that consciousness will definitely be the highest.
268. You are sitting here: ‘you are’. Prior to words. Now the hearsay goes ‘I am’, ‘I am’ means the flow of the mind has started. Now whatever you say with that ‘I amness’ through the mind about ‘you’, you have represented as yourself. But that is not so.
269.The capital we have is the knowledge ‘I am’. But what have we done? We have handed over that knowledge to the body and we say ‘I am the body’. Thereby we have reduced the totality, the limitless, to the limited – a specified insignificant body. And that is why, being unable to give up this association with the body, we are afraid of dying.
270.The vital force carries out all the activities. The mind communicates, and the knowledge ‘I am’ is merely a witness; this is the actual state of affairs. But all these – that is, food body quintessence, and the knowledge ‘I am’, the vital breath and the mind – these are all a temporary phase only; so long as the food essence is available, the knowingness will last.
271.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the product of interaction within the five elemental state, You are not that! You as the Absolute, are not the knowledge ‘I am’.
272.It is very simple. The body and in the body…it is like a coin. On one side, you have the vital breath for making possible all activity; and on the other side is the knowledge ‘I am’. Only when the vital breath is there, the knowledge ‘I am’ is present. When the vital breath leaves the body, the knowledge ‘I am’ also disappears. And both of these are the product of the food essence body. I am not that; this entire composite I am not. This you have to realize.
273.Find out why you are, what is the cause of your being ‘I am’? Actually you had no knowledge that you are or you were. But at this moment, you know you are. Why is that? Understand its cause. You alone know why you are; why is it offered to you that you are, you alone know. Don’t ask anyone else about it, but inquire by yourself. Don’t bother about others, worry only about yourself. That knowledge ‘I am’ is the product of what, is due to what? How and why? Inquire only into this matter.
274. Only that individual who has lost his individuality has merged with the ‘Parabrahman’. So the individuality must go. The entire world moves on the basis of one concept, and that is ‘I am’ – the fundamental concept of one’s individuality.
275. Ultimately all these concepts can and must be understood to be false, but the difficulty and the essential thing is to be convinced that the original basic concept ‘I am’ itself is false.
276.The aim is to awaken yourself to the faith in the self, ‘I am’. That is the entire purpose. So whatever is inducive to that development you may accept. Suppose you have faith in a living guru, then accept a living guru. If you have faith in a guru who has left his body, accept that guru.
277.First of all, this knowingness appeared, the knowingness ‘I am’; later on you embraced the body. Hold on to this only, and don’t ask any questions. You came to know yourself, ‘I am’, to abide in that itself is ‘bhakti’, the devotion.
278. Before you occurred to yourself as ‘I am’; you were in the highest state – the guru of the gurus – the ‘Parabrahman’ state. Later on you started filling up with all kinds of grosser matter and you came down to the body sense – I am the body. So all these impurities have to be removed. Until then, you have to stay put in the quietude.
279. Your fall started with the appearance of that beingness, ‘I am’. With the appearance of this knowingness ‘I am’, the next fall was embracing the body as ‘I am’. And then you gathered so many things onto yourself. Hold on to the state of knowing yourself as ‘I am’ as the truth. All other things you have gathered to yourself are unreal.
280.From the no-knowing state, the first veil I took was that of ‘I am’, That was formless, nameless. But I embraced the body: I got a form for myself; I got a name for myself. This was the fall. Therefore all sages advise: Give up the shackles of the body! ‘I am the body’ – these are the shackles. Give them up.
281. This is no joke, but you can become ‘Parabrahman’ right now. Only it is not a commodity that you can acquire. You, a hundred years ago, were the ‘Parabrahman’. Give me all the information about that state of a hundred years back. Focus your attention only on that consciousness ‘I am’. Don’t be led astray by all the so-called spiritual disciplines and rigmaroles.
282.Who has the knowledge ‘I am’? Somebody in you knows the knowledge ‘I am’, Who is it? It is very obvious that you know you are, but what or who is it that knows you are?
283.It is pure awareness that knows ‘I am’. Who can understand that illusory state? ‘I amness’ is illusory only. It is not a perfect state, it is illusion. Who knows the illusion? A non-illusory state only can know the illusory state. But what is the necessity to say pure awareness? ‘Awareness’ means pure. Since awareness knows ‘I am’, it is other; it is more than ‘I am’. That is the highest; there are no gradations in awareness. In the Absolute, the ‘Parabrahman’ state, there is no question of impure or pure awareness.
284.You are not the personality or the individual. The quintessence of this food, which in turn is the outcome of the five-elemental play, is the taste ‘I am’. ‘I am’ is not a personality or an individual. I am addressing that principle, that touch of ‘I am’, that consciousness which is the product of the food essence body.
285.How can you speak or develop any concept unless the primary concept ‘I am’ is available? This primary concept begets further concepts, that is all other concepts occur to it. However, whatever concept occurs to you, including the primary concept ‘I am’, is not the eternal state.
286.This primary concept, ‘I amness’ is dishonest, because it is still a concept only. Finally one has to transcend that also and be in the ‘nirvikalpa’ state, which means the concept-free state. Then you have no concept at all, not even of ‘I am’. In that state one does not know that one is. This state is known as ‘Parabrahman’: ‘Brahman’ transcended. ‘Brahman’ is manifest; ‘Parabrahman’ is beyond that, prior to that; the Absolute. Do you understand what I am driving at? Whatever you caught in your attention, that attention should eventually turn into no-attention. The state that is finally left over is Awareness, ‘Parabrahman’.
287.With the arrival of the consciousness, it occurs to you that you are; simultaneously, ‘I am’ occurs to you or in your attention. So when the consciousness is not there, attention is also not there. Subsequent to the arrival of consciousness and attention, everything else crept in. The Absolute state is prior to consciousness; it means the unborn state. Since the ‘Parabrahman’ is the unborn state, prior to consciousness, can it have an iota of knowledge?
288.How can you retain the pride that I am like this? This ‘I am’ business depends entirely on the food essence. So how can you retain it perpetually – that I shall remain like this only? To extract any essence, water is very necessary, and the water quality is bound to dry up.
289.The knowledge ‘I am’ is a primary concept, and is also non-eternal. The One, the Absolute, which is eternal and aware, why should he worry about anybody else?
290.Once you reject what you are not, whatever finally remains, the leftover, is yourself – your true nature. Presently, whatever you know is ‘I am’, this ‘I am’ is the product of the five elements. Out of the elements comes the food body and because of the food body, that ‘I amness’ is sustained. And you are also not that ‘I am’. ‘I am’ is the taste, the fragrance of this food body. The ultimate ‘you’ has no fragrance, no taste, no touch of ‘I amness’.
291.The scriptures say that we have our ‘karma’ and our sin and that is why we are here, but this is for the ignorant masses. One who has realized the self-knowledge ‘I am’ for him these stories are of no use.
292.The primary illusion is only this knowingness ‘I am’, prior to that there was no illusion. This very consciousness is the source of illusion. This illusion or consciousness or ‘I amness’ does not remain as something eternal. It is liberated; this non-eternal consciousness is liberated, when the knowingness is transformed into non-knowingness, that is liberation.
293.To produce the source of the mind, ‘I am’, you must have the ingredient of the five-elemental juice. If that is available, the sprouting of the mind can begin with ‘I am’. You know you are before even speaking the words ‘I am’. Subsequent to the knowingness ‘I am’, you say ‘I am’ by words.
294.Are you not even before you have spoken the words ‘I am’? Stay put there only. There begins your spirituality, the foremost ‘you’, ‘I am’ without words, before the beginning of words. Be there; out of that grows the experience ‘I am’.Witnessing happens to that principle which prior to your saying the words ‘I am’. There is no such thing as deliberate witnessing. Witnessing just happens, by itself.
295.You must analyze ‘death’, the meaning of this common parlance. At the time that death occurs, the vital breath quits the body, gradually leaves the body. At the same time as the vital breath, the mind and the language also go out. Simultaneously, this quality of ‘I am’, this ‘sattva-guna’, the quality of beingness, also departs or goes into oblivion. Only I, the Absolute, remains. Stay put there only, nothing happens to I, the Absolute.
296.Here is an article before it came into existence, what was its name? From non-being into the being state, how was it observed? You just felt that touch. Before observing anything we feel the touch of ‘I am’. To realize that state prior to conception, that eternal state, whatever that state is, to abide in that is the highest. Now, for your sake, I attach a name to it, the ‘Parabrahman’ state – the Absolute.
297.A ‘jnani’ knows that he has realized when he recognizes his knowingness, which is the sense of ‘I am’. Right here and now you are in the realized state. But you try to judge it through desires and mind-concepts, hence your inability to apperceive it and abide in it. In the ‘jnani’ state, there is no need for anything, not even to know oneself. You are attached to the body-senses, therefore even though you may attain an age of hundred years, you still would crave for more years.
298. On the state of ‘non-beingness’, the beingness appeared together with manifestation, creating a feeling as if ‘I am’; who that is, is not important, only ‘I am’ is important. The initial humming of the beingness as ‘I am, I am’ is the duality. But who accepts the duality? The ‘non-beingness’ accepts duality with the beingness. The Absolute ‘non-being’ state, by assuming the being state, becomes dual in manifestation.
299. First you have what is called ‘atma-bhava’ – that is the ‘I am’ sense. Later, this sense identifies with the form of a body, when it is called ‘aham-akar’, the ‘I am’ form, this is ego. Ego is never a title or name, but just a sense of ‘I am’ prior to words. The waking state, the sleep state and the knowingness ‘I am’ constitute an ego. In the absence of these three states what do you think you are? What would be the evidence of your existence?
300. The knowledge ‘I am’ is nothing. That knowledge is like a guest; it comes and goes. You have come here; you are very clever. Now what did happen? All the knowledge, which you had collected elsewhere and brought here, is rendered useless and redundant. So long as beingness is there, all worldly activities will go on. But you now realize that ‘You’ are neither the activities in the beingness nor the beingness. ‘You’ as the Absolute, are none of these.
301.With the transcendence of the knowledge ‘I am’, the Absolute prevails. The state is called ‘Parabrahman’, while the knowledge ‘I am’ is termed Brahman. This knowledge ‘I am’ or the beingness is illusion only. Therefore, when Brahman is transcended, only the ‘Parabrahman’ is, in which there is not even a trace of the knowledge ‘I am’.
302. First there was no message ‘I am’ and also there was no world. Instantly, the message ‘I am’ and this magnificent world materialized out of ‘nothingness’! How amazing! This message ‘I am’ is nothing other that the advertisement of the Eternal Truth.
303.How was I in the absence of the message ‘I am’ – that is, prior to beingness? I provided you with the name tags for that state. These titles are ‘Parabrahman’, ‘Paramatman’ etc.; they are only pointers to the state, but not the state itself. In the Ultimate they are redundant, extraneous and bogus.
304. The primary miracle is that I experience ‘I am’ and the world. Prior to this experiencing, I abided in myself, in my eternal Absolute state. Without my beingness – that is, without the message ‘I am’ – my eternal Absolute state only prevails.
305.The eternal Absolute state of mine prior to the beingness, when the message ‘I am’ was not, is supremely significant. Who would have witnessed the message ‘I am’, if my priormost state of the ‘non-beingness’ was not?
306. If one obtains and relishes the nectar of the Lord’s feet, the ‘charan-amrita’, the mind can be conquered. This is called ‘manojaya’ – victory over the mind. However, only a true devotee, a ‘bhakta’, a god, can obtain the ‘charan-amrita’. But what is its relationship with all beings? It dwells in the core of all beings as the knowledge ‘I am’, the love ‘to be’, the ‘charan-amrita’.
307.But how can such a state be attained? Only if one totally accepts the knowledge ‘I am’ as oneself with full conviction and faith and firmly believes in the dictum ‘I am that by which I know I am’. This knowledge ‘I am’ is the ‘charan-amrita’. Why is it called ‘amrita’ – the nectar? Because it is said, by drinking nectar one becomes immortal. Thus a true devotee, by abiding in the knowledge ‘I am’ transcends the experience of death and attains immortality.
308. Once you subside into the consciousness, the factual state of Reality shall be revealed to you with the knowledge that will emanate out of you intuitively, like spring water. This will enable you to discern not what is real and unreal, but, most importantly, to realize what ‘I am’. And who could be that one? Surely not an individual who is trapped in the mind-shell, but that one is the knowledge ‘I am’ – the consciousness.
309.Consciousness is the sense of knowingness ‘I am’ without words, and it appeared unknowingly and unsolicited. Only in the realm of knowingness ‘I am’ – the consciousness – can a world be, and so also an experience. Hold on to this knowingness ‘I am’ and the fount of knowledge will well up within you, revealing the mystery of the Universe; of your body and psyche; of the play of the five elements, the three ‘gunas’ and ‘prakriti-purusha’; and of everything else. In the process of this revelation, your individualistic personality confined to the body shall expand into the manifested universe, and it will be realized that you permeate and embrace the entire cosmos as your ‘body’ only. This is known as the ‘Pure Superknowledge’ – ‘Shuddhavijnana’.
310.Now coming to a very subtle situation, what is it in you that understands this knowledge ‘you are’ – or from your standpoint ‘I am’ without a name, title or word? Subside in that innermost center and witness the knowledge ‘I am’ and ‘just be’; this is the bliss of being – the ‘swarupananda’.
311.Paths and movements cannot transport you into Reality, because their function is to enmesh you within the dimensions of knowledge, while the Reality prevails prior to it. To apprehend this, you must stay put at the source of your creation, at the beginning of the knowledge ‘I am’. So long as you do not achieve this, you will be entangled in the chains forged by your mind and get enmeshed in those of others.
312. This true knowledge, the knowledge ‘I am’, is also rendered the status of ‘non-knowledge’ in the final Absolute state. When one is established in this final free state, the knowledge ‘I am’ becomes ‘non-knowledge’.
313. For all beings it is the same experience. Early morning, immediately after waking, just the feeling ‘I am’ is felt inside or the beingness happens, and therefore further witnessing of all else happens. The first witnessing is that of ‘I am’, this primary witnessing is the prerequisite for all further witnessing. But to whom is the witnessing occurring? One that ever is, even without waking, to that ever-present substratum the witnessing of the waking state happens.
314. At present, ‘I am’ is in the beingness state. But when I do not have the knowingness of the ‘I am’ illusion, then the ‘Poornabrahman’ or ‘Parabrahman’ state prevails. In the absence of the touch of ‘I amness’ I am the total complete, ‘Poornabrahman’ state, the permanent state. The borderline of beingness and non-beingness is intellect-boggling, because the intellect subsides at that precise location. This borderline is the ‘maha-yoga’. You must be at that borderline, that ‘maha-yoga’ state’. You descend into the ‘godown’ of that state which has the title ‘birth’.
315. The sense that ‘you are’ is a big thing. What is most significant is the fact that you remember your sense of being, subsequently all other things appear. Earlier this memory ‘I am’ was not and suddenly it appeared. Now I expound on the spiritual talk called ‘niroopana’. In Marathi the word ‘niroopana’ is derived from the word ‘niroopa’ (nirope), which means ‘message’. Therefore, to deliver any spiritual talk that is ‘niroopana’, the primary message ‘I am’ must first be present, then whatever ensues from this primary message will be the spiritual talk.
316. This little container of food essence is being sucked by that beingness, ‘I am’ day and night. The principle that sucks that container is not the body; it is apart from the body. This beingness principle dwells in that food body itself. Just as the child sucks on the mother’s breast, the beingness consumes the body.
317. Just as the salty taste is present in the entire ocean, the beingness or the sense of ‘I am’ in the human form has the inherent capacity to be all-pervading, but having conditioned – and thereby limited – itself to the body form, it interested only in protecting and preserving the body.
318. How does one recognize this ‘atman’? It is by understanding the knowledge ‘I am’ – the ‘atma-jnana’. Just as space is all-pervading, so the knowledge ‘I am’ is all-pervading, limitless and infinite. How strange, such a supreme principle is treated as though it is a body! All the sufferings are due to this mistaken identity. If you give the highest honor due to it, you will not undergo either suffering or death.
319. To abide in the knowledge ‘I am’ is one’s true religion – the ‘svadharma’. But instead of following it, you opted to be irreligious by submitting to the dictates of your concepts, which led you to believe that you are a body. This misconception ensured only the fear of death.
320. The fragrance or sweetness of the food-essence body is the knowledge ‘I am’. It has no name and form; it is the ‘I love’ state, the ‘I-taste’. But from your body-mind state, you will go to pilgrimages and various gurus. So long as the consciousness is there, that humming goes on, and who does the humming? The principle which is humming and saying, ‘I am, I am’ is itself your guru.
321. ‘Jnana-yoga’ means to inquire how this ‘I amness’ and the world came about. To realize that ‘I amness’ and the world are the same is ‘jnana-yoga’. Here the knowledge ‘I am’ should subside in itself.
322. The primary occurrence is the reminder ‘I am’ and out of which springs the language and the talk. So, what is this ‘I amness’? Remember that it is in the primary reminder ‘I am’ that the whole cosmos and your body exist. Who and from where is this sense of being? This has to be thoroughly investigated. When this is done, while abiding necessarily in the knowledge ‘I am’ – the sense of beingness – an amazing revelation will be made, namely that from your own seed-beingness the whole manifest universe is projected including your body. This supreme and powerful principle, though being itself without form and name, upon sensing ‘I am’ instantly embraces the body and mistakenly accepts this as its own. It clings to the body-identity so quickly that the fact of its own independent existence is easily missed.
323. You are quite knowledgeable; now understand this; if you think you are dying, it shows that you still identify with your body and that your knowledge ‘I am’ has not merged in itself, which also indicates that you have not attained ‘jnana-yoga’. Your spiritual knowledge therefore smacks of impurity. While you are actually the manifest knowledge ‘I am’, you cling to a body as yourself; this is the impurity.’
324. Suppose a question is asked of you, what were you a hundred years back? You would reply ‘I was not’. That means, I was not like ‘this’, that is not like this present ‘I am’. Who (and how) could (he) say ‘I was not like this’? The one who says this, was he not there? The one who was prior to a hundred years was not like this present ‘I am’, but he was and is now.
325. Do nothing, absolutely nothing! Just be, be the knowledge ‘I am’ only and abide there. To imbibe this meditate on beingness only. Catch hold of the knowledge ‘I am’ in meditation. In this process, the realization occurs that ‘I’ the Absolute am not the ‘guna’ ‘I am’; therefore in meditation nothing is to be retained in memory. Nevertheless something will appear on the memory screen, but be unconcerned, just be, do nothing. Refrain from grasping anything in meditation; the moment you do, otherness begins, and so does duality. Nothing is to be done. Then all your riddles will be solved and dissolved. ‘Moolmaya’ – that is, the primary illusion – will release her stranglehold on you and will get lost.
326. At first ‘no one’ is. Instantly, one is, and then two. The subject of the talk is: How did these two reduce to one, and finally to nothing? Out of nothingness spontaneously the sense of beingness is felt - this is one. Later, when the sense of beingness knows ‘I am’ duality begins. Then after the duality has arisen, the sense of being identifies with the form, and so on. Actually to refer to the sense of being as ‘one’, is not quite correct. Since in this state only the sense of being prevails, where is the need to say even ‘one’? With the appearance of otherness (duality), both no.1 and no.2 appear simultaneously. To say ‘something is’, ‘I’ must be there first. If ‘I’ am not, I cannot say ‘something is’. So the fundamental principle of spirituality is that ‘I must be there, before anything else can be. This ‘I’ is the beingness which if first.
327.When you sit in deep meditation, your sense of being is totally infused with the knowledge ‘I am’ only. In such a state it will be revealed to you intuitively as to how and why your sense of ‘I amness’ emerged. Consciousness, beingness, sense of being, ‘I amness’, all are the same in you, prior to emanation of any words.
328. This is a subtle point, so try to understand it clearly. When I say ‘I was not’ prior to conception, then what I actually mean is that I was not like this present ‘I am’. But that ‘I’ which could discern this must be there to judge the absence of the present ‘I am’.
329. Shall we call the knowledge ‘I am’ the guru? But even that knowledge you are not! Knowledge ‘I am’ means consciousness, God, ‘Ishwara’, guru etc. but you the Absolute are not that.
330. This is to be understood and realized, that ‘I am’ is even before the arising of any words and questions in me. People always want a name or concept to indicate the state of ‘I am’ prior to words. When this is done by giving it a name, like for example Brahman, they feel satisfied.
331.Beingness can act in the world only with the aid of the body. This body is the quintessence of the five elements, and the quintessence of the body-essence is the knowledge ‘I am’. The presiding principle of the whole functioning is the knowledge ‘I am’. This knowledge ‘I am’ has to be correctly understood.
332. A body maybe dark, fair, tall or short, but the indwelling principle – which is the knowledge ‘I am’ – has no color or dimension, just like the vital breath and mind. It is merely a ‘sense of presence’ a feeling of effulgence. And mind functions like its vehicle or medium for executing worldly activities.
333. You should understand this clearly. If one thinks one is the body, one becomes a slave of mind and suffers accordingly. Therefore, you should completely identify yourself with the highest principle in you, which is the knowledge ‘I am’. This will elevate you to the status of ‘brihaspati’ – the guru of gods.
334.When the meditator forgets himself totally in meditation, it is ‘vishranti’ which means complete relaxation ending total forgetfulness. This is the blissful state, where there is no need for words, concepts or even the sense of ‘I am’. The state does not know ‘it is’ and is beyond happiness and suffering and altogether beyond words; it is called the ‘Parabrahman’ – a non-experiential state.
335. Before the emanation of any words, ‘I’ already exist; later I say mentally ‘I am’. The word-free and thought-free state is the ‘atman’.
336. The knowingness ‘I am’ is gradually felt by the child and this is followed by the mind. This ‘I amness’ feeling before the formation of the mind is the ignorant-child-principle, termed the ‘balkrishna’ state. This ‘balkrishna’ principle has great potential. Here ‘bal’ means the food essence, child-body, and ‘krishna’ means ‘non-knowing’, that is, ignorance. But it has the potential to receive, respond and react. I am not in this state, the child principle, ‘balkrishna’, as I abide in the Absolute.
337. At present you identify yourself with your body and mind. Therefore, in the initial stages of your spiritual practice, you should reject the identity by imbibing the principle that ‘I am’ is the vital breath and the consciousness only and not the body and mind. In the later stages, the vital breath and the consciousness – that is the knowledge ‘I am’ – merge in one’s ultimate nature.
338. That ultimate state is known as ‘vishranti’, which means total rest, complete relaxation, utter quietude etc. The other meaning, by splitting the word, would be, ‘vishara (visra)-anti’ – forget yourself in the end. That means in the ultimate state, ‘you-areness’ is totally forgotten. Whether ‘I am’ or ‘I am not’ both are forgotten. This is the highest type of rest – ‘parama-vishranti’.
339. When I pleased my ‘I amness’ by understanding it, only then did I come to know this ‘I amness’ and in the process also discovered that ‘I’ the Absolute, am not that ‘I am’. Stay put at one place. Having collected all the knowledge, ponder over it in seclusion.
340. You abide in that knowledge ‘I am’. You should understand that your destination is your own self, the ‘I am’. It is the very source of everything; That ‘I am’ is to be realized. Because ‘you are’, the consciousness is. Before you say ‘I am’ you already are. ‘I am’ – the word or the ‘I am’ feeling that you get inside you – is not eternal. But you are eternal and ancient.
341. You have to stabilize in your present true nature, ‘I am’. All other secondary and redundant objects should be got rid of. Do not focus you attention on any of these things. The whole process is to be in your source. At present, what is your source? ‘I am’. Catch hold of that ‘I amness’ and be in it. You have to realize your own self. You must be at the borderline between ‘I am’ and ‘Not-‘I am’’.
342. When that witness itself, which is ‘I am’, subsides, what remains? With the witness gone, all other things have disappeared too. By the same token, upon the arising of the ‘ I am’, the whole manifestation takes place; these two are not separate, they are one, ‘I am’ is the witness, the entire manifest world is because of this.
343.When ‘I am’ arises, everything appears; when ‘I am’ subsides everything subsides. Now this what I am trying to tell you, but you want something else. You want something about your future, something which is part of manifestation, but I am trying to hit at it.
344. This ‘I am’ is an announcement, it is not the real, it has come out of something else. What the real is, I am not trying to tell you, because words negate that. Whatever I am telling you, is not the truth, because it has come out of the ‘I am’.
345. While I am talking about it (‘I am’) I take you to the source of the spring. There, water is coming out in a trickle now. This trickle subsequently becomes a river, an estuary, and finally the sea, I take you to the source again and again. Once you arrive at the source, you come to know that actually there is no water, the water is purely the taste, the news that ‘I am’.
346. There is no explanation for how this seed, this consciousness or knowledge ‘I am’ has arisen. But once it is in existence, it cannot stand still – that is, consciousness is tantamount to ‘movement’. And all movement takes place through the ‘gunas’, which are inherent in the knowledge ‘I am’. This consciousness keeps on ‘humming’ – (Maharaj uses the Marathi word ‘gun-gun’) – and expresses itself through the three ‘gunas’.
347. This ‘gun-gun’ is within the knowledge ‘I am’, which includes the physical form. The ‘gun-gun’ entity and the knowledge ‘I am’ and the physical form – that whole bundle – has been created out of the five elements. So up to this point, the whole thing can be said to be entirely mechanistic and therefore pure ignorance.
348. How did I get this birth? That is the point on which I persist in finding the answer; I ‘must’ know this. When I was told ‘sattva’, then what is ‘sattva’? ‘Sattva’ is the essence of the five elements. In that essence, in that juice, lies the knowledge ‘I am’; but all that is still of the five elements. Then how did this come about? My guru told me the whole story. Thus I came to know it is ignorance, and I know from experience, that everybody is starting from there. Thus whatever has come about is sheer ignorance, and we are nothing more, that is what my guru told me.
349. My guru further pointed out to me the fact that the only thing you have and which you can utilize to unravel the mystery of life, is this knowledge ‘I am’. Without that there is absolutely nothing, so I got hold of it, as my guru advised me, and then I wanted to find out how the spiritual aspect of ‘me’ came about without my knowledge. On my pure Absoluteness, which has no place, and no shape or form, this knowledge ‘I am’ came, which also has no shape or form. Therefore, it appears; and it is only an illusion.
350.This beingness, the knowledge ‘I am’, which I call ‘upadro’, is the source of trouble. In this ‘upadro’, in this primary essence, lies the knowledge ‘I am’ – you know that you are. This quality of beingness (‘sattvaguna’), the knowledge ‘I am’ cannot tolerate itself. It cannot stand itself, alone, just knowing itself. Therefore that ‘rajoguna’ is there… it takes the beingness for a ride in various activities, so that it does not dwell on itself; it is very difficult to sustain that state. And ‘tamoguna’ is the basest quality, it claims authorship or doership for all those activities conducted through ‘rajoguna’. This is the play happening in these three gunas (qualities). Again understand, you are experiencing this ‘sattvaguna’, the knowledge ‘I am. This ‘I amness’ is experienced by you, the Absolute, but you are not the ‘I amness’.
351. ‘Sadhana’, the discipline, is only this: The knowledge which is dwelling in this body, the quintessence of these three ‘gunas’ – the knowledge ‘I am’, ‘I am that’ – this is the initial step. You must be one with it; you must abide in that only. You have to think ‘ I am not the body but I am that formless, nameless knowledge indwelling in this body’; that (is) ‘I am’. When you abide sufficiently long in this state, whatever doubts you may have, that knowledge ‘I am’ itself will sprout out with life and meaning for you, intended for you only, and everything will become clear. No external knowledge will be necessary.
352. Conviction! That is the only technique for the ‘sadhana’ if you are thinking of any initiation…only the words of the guru that you are not the body! That is the initiation. Stay put there, in that state. It is spontaneous, natural, that ‘shraddha’ (faith). What is that faith? ‘I am’ without words, whatever you are that is the faith. Now you have to elevate yourself to the state of ‘Brahman’; this is the condition you have to develop.
353. What exactly is born? What is born are three states: the waking state, the sleep state, and the knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness. The body and the vital breath would not be able to function if this consciousness were not present. These three states work through the three attributes (‘gunas’). I very clearly see that which has been born. And I also know that I am not that which is born. And that is why I am totally fearless. So this knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, this feeling or sense of being, is the quintessence of the body. And if that body essence is gone, this feeling, the sense of being, will also have gone.
354. Once the body and the sense of being(‘I am’) goes what remains is the Original, which is unconditioned, without attributes, and without identity; that on which this temporary state of the consciousness and the three states and the three ‘gunas’ have come and gone. It is called ‘Parabrahman’, the Absolute.
355. In that ‘Parabrahman’, which unconditioned,, without attributes, without identity – the identity comes only when there is the knowledge ‘I am’ – so if that itself is not there, who is there to ask? This is to understood not by ‘someone’ (with a body-mind identity), but it must be experienced, and in such a manner that the experiencer and experience are one.
356. When the truth came out, it was found that in a certain atom the entire Universe is contained. And what is that atom? It is the beingness, the knowledge ‘I am’. That contains the whole Universe.
357. The atomic consciousness contains the whole Universe, but yet he (the ‘jnani’) knows that he is not that consciousness. So in that case what pride can he have? He is the Absolute state, in which the ‘I am’ consciousness is absent. If you meet any ‘jnanis, you will find it easy to recognize them, for they will not have any pride in their Self-knowledge, since they have transcended that knowledge also. They say ‘I am not this knowledge or this consciousness’.
358. My statement, and that of my guru, is that childhood is a cheat, it is false. The knowledge ‘I am’ itself is a cheat. When the beingness appears, that love for existence is a result of the primary illusion, that ‘maya’. Once you come to know that you exist, you feel like enduring eternally, you always want to be, to exist, to survive. And so the struggle begins, all because of ‘maya’.
359. This knowledge ‘I am’ has dawned on you, since then whatever other knowledge you have acquired, whatever experiences you have had, whatever you have seen of the world has all been witnessed. But that one to whom the witnessing takes place is entirely separate from that which is witnessed.
360. You base yourself on the body that you are now, and don’t understand its root. That is why we think we are this body, and for that you must do meditation. What is meditation? Meditation is not this body-mind meditating as an individual, but it is this knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, meditating on itself. Then the consciousness will unfold its own meaning.
361.This itself is the greatest miracle, that I got the news ‘I am’, have you any doubts that you are? It is self-evident. Prior to knowing that you are, what knowledge did you have? ‘Dhyana’ means to have an objective. You want to consider something. You ‘are’ that something, just to be, you are. Just being the being ‘I am’. You meditate on something; that knowledge ‘I am’ is yourself. Abide only there. How can you ask any questions at this point? Because that is the beginning of knowledge.
362. By reading various books and listening to everything else, you cannot become a ‘mahatma’, but only through that knowledge ‘I am’. Don’t concentrate on the body; because of a body you call yourself male or female. Just hold on to that knowledge ‘I am’ only without body sense – beyond name and form or design. But you have to employ name, form and design for the sake of worldly activities.
363. You must have a firm conviction that ‘I am’ is only that ‘I am’ without body-mind form – the knowledge ‘I am’ purely. You say all these things, but has the knowledge come within the purview of the knowledge? You must have that full conviction, whatever you may have said, that is the truth and that is ‘I am’. There are no techniques, except the technique that ‘I am’ the firm conviction that ‘I am’ means ‘I am’ only, abidance in ‘I’. Don’t practice this thing, only develop your conviction.
364.This conviction can be strengthened by meditation, like ‘dhyana’. And ‘dhyana’ means the knowledge must remain in meditation with the knowledge. Now, what is meditation? Meditation is the knowledge ‘I am’ remaining in that knowledge. There is the waking state and the sleep state, and the knowledge that you are, I exist, I know that I exist. Other than that what capital does anyone have than merely knowledge ‘I am’? ‘Dhyana’ is when this knowledge, this consciousness that I am, meditates on itself and not on something other than itself.
365.When you say you sit for meditation, the first thing to be done is understand that it is not this body identification that is sitting for meditation, but this knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, which is sitting in meditation and is meditating on itself. When this is finally understood, then it becomes easy. When this consciousness, this conscious presence, merges in itself, the state of ‘samadhi’ ensues. It is the conceptual feeling that I exist that disappears and merges into the beingness itself. So this conscious presence also gets merged into that knowledge, that beingness – that is ‘samadhi’.
366. There is that nine-month period in the womb. So what is the content of the womb? It is that knowledge ‘I am’ in dormant condition. This is being developed slowly, so within the birth principle everything is contained. That which is called birth, the birth principle is ‘turiya’; the experience that you exist itself is ‘turiya’. ‘Turiya’ means where the consciousness is. One who knows ‘turiya’ is ‘turiyatita’. That is my state. ‘Turiya’ is within the consciousness, which is the product of the five elements. And one who transcends that, who knows the ‘turiya’, is ‘turiyatita’. In order to stabilize in ‘turiya’, you must know the birth principle. ‘Turiya’ is always described as the witness state that see through waking, dreaming and sleeping. And ‘turiyatita’ is even beyond that.
367.This ‘I am’ concept was not there prior to what you call ‘birth’. So as this concept has appeared, it will also go away. How am I affected? In no way whatsoever, because it is not true. This applies to all concepts. Prior to birth and after birth, whatever knowledge I have, my own, without hearing it from any one, that is the only true knowledge I accept. And the proof lies in my guru’s words.
368. The body dies. This means what? It means only the thought ‘I am’, that concept, has disappeared. Nothing has happened to the knower of the whole happening. So long as the basic concept ‘I am’ is there, the conceptual element cannot disappear. It is the concept itself that has given various names to itself, but it is still the same concept. Before this concept of ‘I am’ came on you, were you happy or unhappy? Was there even any feeling of happiness or unhappiness? Any of the dualities? In the absence of the basic concept ‘I am’, there is no thought, no awareness, and no consciousness of one’s existence.
369.Originally, I am untainted – uncovered by anything, without stigma – since nobody existed prior to me. Nor do I entertain any concepts about somebody existing, before me. Everything is in the form of the manifested world, after the appearance of the knowledge ‘I am’ with the body. Together with the body and the indwelling ‘ I amness’ everything is. Prior to the appearance of this body and the knowledge ‘I am’, what was there?
370. The feeling ‘I am’ is the quintessence of everything, but I the Absolute am not that. That ‘I amness’ is the highest knowledge. And this is surrendered here by the abidance in the action.
371. So long as the concept ‘I am’ is still there, they (people who contact maharaj) have not gone beyond or prior to it; they have not gone beyond the total manifestation. So now when people come here, I talk with them, from what level am I talking? I am talking from the level that you are consciousness and not the body-mind. In my state whatever comes out is from the total manifestation, not from the point of view of the Absolute. Hang on to that consciousness, which is your only capital, and do ‘dhyana’ and let that unfold whatever knowledge has to be unfolded.
372. At present you wrongly identify yourself as the body. Body is given a certain name; that is ‘you’; you consider it to be like that. But I say that in this body, consciousness is present, or the knowledge ‘I am’ as I call it, is there. You should identify yourself as this knowledge. That is all.
373. For meditation you should sit with identification with the knowledge ‘I am’ only and have confirmed to yourself that you are not the body. You must dwell only in that knowledge ‘I am’ – not merely the words ‘I am’. And the indwelling knowledge that you are, without words, that itself you are. In that identity you must stabilize yourself. And then whatever doubts you have will be cleared by that very knowledge, and everything will be opened up to you.
374. Forget all about physical disciplines in this connection. I am telling you that the indwelling principle ‘I am’, the knowledge that you are, you have to ‘be’ that. Just be that, with that knowledge ‘ I am’, hold on to the knowledge ‘I am’.
375. You know you are sitting here; you know you are, do you require any special effort to hold on to that ‘you are’? You know you are; abide only in that. The ‘I am’ principle without words, that itself is the God of all ‘Ishwaras’.
376. If you identify yourself as the body, such an identity must be let go of, sacrificed. Your real identity has no body and no thought. And that self, the spontaneous knowledge ‘ I am’ you are. Since the self is not the body, the self is neither male nor female. You must fulfill the vow that you are not the body but solely the indwelling principle ‘I am’.
377. With firm conviction, you abide in this knowledge ‘I am’ only; bereft of body-mind sense, only ‘I am’. If you dwell therein, if you be that only, in due course it will get mature. And it will reveal to you all the knowledge. And you need not go to anybody else.
378.The concept ‘I am’ is the primordial ‘maya’. And that ‘maya’, that primordial concept ‘I am’ requires support and therefore God and ‘Ishwara’ have been born. Along with that the whole manifestation, the entire Universe, has come upon it. Otherwise, there is absolutely nothing. And out of many ‘jnanis’, there will only be a rare one who knows the real nature of this primary concept.
379. First, the knowingness knows itself, knowing that ‘I am’. And in the illumination by that ‘I amness’, or that consciousness, everything else observed. I have had to repeat the same thing again and again, and I do not want to run kindergarten classes of spirituality.
380. All this is the play of concepts. The primary concept ‘I am’ appears spontaneously. It likes ‘I am’; it loves that ‘I am’ state. Devouring ever more concepts, it gets totally enmeshed in them. And what is the source of all concepts? This primary feeling ‘I am’. But never forget the fact that it itself is a concept, time-bound. And so it is all mental entertainment.
381. What equipment you are having is that ‘prana’. ‘Upasana’ means worship, worship of ‘prana’ itself. For doing that what equipment do you possess? It is ‘prana’ itself. Along with ‘prana’ there is that knowledge ‘I am’, or consciousness. These two things are available to you to do anything, nothing more than that.
382. In the absence of beingness, when you did not know about your existence? Nothing was of any value to you. This memory ‘I am’ is neither true nor false; it is without these two attributes. That memory of beingness only appears to exist.
383. For eternal peace you must dwell in yourself, know how this touch of ‘I am’ has appeared. All other knowledge is of no use in this connection.
384.Where there is the vital breath, the knowledge ‘I am’ is present. There being no vital breath, the knowledge of ‘I amness’ is absent. Take full advantage of the naturally available capital with you – that is, your life force and the knowledge ‘I am’; they always go hand in hand. Right now, exploit it to the utmost. All worldly activities are going on only because of the knowledge ‘I am’ together with that motive force which is the life force, the vital breath. And that is not something apart from you; you are that only. Investigate and study this exclusively, abide in that, worship that only.
385. What is this state before this knowledge ‘I am’ came upon me? When the knowledge ‘ I am’ came, the one who is satisfied with that will reach the state where he considers himself God and ‘Brahman’. But he does not go beyond it or prior to it. In the ultimate state lies the prior state; that is, the state before this knowledge ‘I am’ ever dawned on me – the highest state, the best state, the original state.
386. I call a ‘siddha’ one who has attained the ultimate, in that ultimate state, the devotee and God, the ‘maya’ (primary illusion) and the ‘Brahman’ have disappeared. And, there is no beneficiary or experiencer of all that, because he is without the concept ‘I am’. He does not know ‘I am’, he does not know that he exists in that state, that knowingness is completely obliterated.
387. This primary concept is the knowledge ‘I am’, it is the mother of all other concepts. In order to get that satisfaction, you must find the source of this primary concept ‘I am’. You should give attention to the knowledge ‘I am’ and meditate on that itself. Knowledge is to be got hold of knowledge only. This will produce the seed, which, through this process of meditation, slowly grows into a big tree, and that itself will give you all the knowledge. It will not be necessary for you to ask anyone what is what.
388. These two entities are available to you, the vital force and the knowledge ‘I am’, the consciousness. They appear without any effort; they are there. Now, in order to be one with ‘Ishwara’, to understand the non-duality you must worship the vital force. Then that knowledge, which is in seed form, slowly grows. And the seeker becomes full of knowledge; in the process he transcends that, and the ultimate state is achieved.
389. ‘I am’ itself is the world; it contains the entire world, that should be your conviction. Just as in a dream, when you feel that you are awake, but actually you are not and your world at that time is the dream world. Similarly this knowingness (in the waking state) contains this so-called real world; that conviction must come. The truth is that there is no difference between (dream) consciousness and (waking) consciousness, although they appear to be greatly different; all consciousness is one.
390. The conviction that this world never existed can happen only to ‘Parabrahman’. If this is indeed your conviction then you are the ‘Parabrahman’. This thing aside, you should discover how this news ‘I am’ – the knowledge of your existence – appeared and at what moment. Go to the source of it and find out.
391. The words of ‘prana’ signify mind. So how could there be mind without vital force? This vital force and the consciousness (that is, the knowledge ‘I am’ or the beingness and the mind) appear simultaneously and always exist together.
392. Before descending into this ‘avatar’, this knowledge quality was not present; knowingness was not there. The ‘I am’ was absent, not available. It is a non-knowing state, but afterwards, the state comprises all conceptual titles and names, and they are a person’s shackles. Any person, any embodied person with that knowledge ‘I am’ carries on his activities in the world with shackles of name only.
393. Once it is understood that ‘I am’ is purely ‘I am’, formless and not that shackled body form – then no liberation is called for. To be stabilized in that beingness, which has no name and form, that itself is liberation.
394. Understanding what that ‘avatar’ is, Lord Krishna avatar, means in essence abiding in that only. Then one is not the body. And what is the body? It is a mere aid for the sustenance or endurance of that ‘I am’ principle.
395. The vital breath gets conditioned or manacled by the bondage of name. It accepts the name as ‘ I am’; this is the mistake. That which is deconditioned from name and form is ‘Paramatman’. That which conditioned by the body, mind, name and form is called ‘jiva’. The language of the vital breath is mind, and the mind is the motive force for all activities.
396. If you are able to establish yourself in the vital breath as you are, you become manifest. The vital breath, when it is conditioned by the body, you call it personality. But as a matter the vital breath is spread all over, it is manifest; it is universal. If you establish in the vital breath as ‘I am’, that in itself will get you there. Don’t be dishonest to your vital breath, worship it, and when you do so, it can lead you anywhere, to any heights – this is the quintessence of my talks. In such simplified fashion, nobody has expounded this profound teaching.
The complete ‘I am’ quotes of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj
By Pradeep
Dedicated to my Guru Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj
Introduction
These quotes have been compiled from seven books that cover almost all the dialogues of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj: I Am That edited by Maurice Frydman, Seeds of Consciousness, Prior to Consciousness and Consciousness and the Absolute edited by Jean Dunn and The Experience of Nothingness, The Nectar of Immortality and The Ultimate Medicine edited by Robert Powell.
Other works that are mostly expositions of his teachings like: The Blissful life by Robert Powell, Pointers from Nisargadatta Maharaj by Ramesh Balsekar, I Am That I Am by Stephen Wolinsky, Song of I Am edited by Jerry Katz and the ASMI – I Am That excerpts compiled and edited by Miguel-Angel Carrasco have not been referred to.
Apart from his teachings, all these texts give a lot of information on Shri Nisragadatta Maharaj. Some other books that may also be of interest are: The Wisdom teachings of Nisargatta Maharaj: A visual journey published by Innerdirections, The Last days of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj published by Yogi impressions and Self Knowledge and Self Realization by Nisargadatta Maharaj, edited by Jean Dunn.
A very useful book is a small one called, Master Key to Self-Realization by Siddharameshwar Maharaj (Nisargadatta Maharaj’s Guru). This is now available as a part of the book, Master of Self-Realization published by Shri Sadguru Trust. The Master Key is an amazing and extremely potent book that lays the foundation of Shri Nisargadattta Maharaj’s teaching. His Guru, Siddharameshwar Maharaj describes in explicit detail the four bodies: Gross body, Subtle body, Causal body and the Supra-Causal body. A step-by-step procedure is described for going through all these bodies and finally transcending them all to reach the final destination, that is the ‘Parabrahman’ or the Absolute. As I understand it, Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj’s primary teaching is to focus on the ‘I am’ which is the root of the Subtle body, after abiding here for a sufficiently long time one just rolls over into ‘I am not’ which is the experience in the Causal body. On this happening, one automatically, without any effort, ‘is’ in the Supra-causal body (‘Turiya’). Now, it is only a step away from the Absolute.
This collection of all the ‘I am’ quotes of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj have been prepared to be used as device to get focused on the ‘I am’. Most of these quotes are as such, while some have been prepared by resorting to concatenations for maintaining the ‘I am’ theme during a dialogue session.
According to me, none of Maharaj’s dialogues require any exposition, anyone with a reasonable amount of intelligence and of course, a deep interest in the subject can understand what he is trying to say. I assume that most of those who use this text have already read all the seven books (or should I say ‘scriptures’) used for these quotes, and if not all at least, I Am That, which is the primary book (scripture).
Let us now, lay aside expositions, and move ahead with execution, which is what Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj wanted us all to do – just abide in the ‘I am’
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The complete ‘I am’ quotes of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj
Quote Source Sequence: 1 to 79 : I Am That
80 to 149 : Seeds Of Consciousness
150 to 220 : Prior To Consciousness
221 to 259 : Consciousness and the Absolute
260 to 295 : The Experience of Nothingness
296 to 341 : The Nectar of Immortality
342 to 396 : The Ultimate Medicine
1.Was it not the sense of ‘I am’ that came first? Some seed consciousness must be existing even during sleep, or swoon. On waking up the experience runs: ‘I am-the body- in the world’. It may appear to arise in succession but in fact it is all simultaneous, a single idea of having a body in a world. Can there be the sense of ‘I am’ without being somebody or other?
2.Go deep into the sense of ‘I am’ and you will find. How do you find a thing you have mislaid or forgotten? You keep it in your mind until you recall it. The sense of being, of ‘I am’ is the first to emerge. Ask yourself whence it comes or just watch it quietly. When the mind stays in the ‘I am’, without moving, you enter a state, which cannot be verbalized, but which can be experienced. All you need to do is to try and try again. After all the sense of ‘I am’ is always with you, only you have attached all kinds of things to it- body, feelings, thoughts, ideas, possessions and so on. All these self-identifications are misleading, because of these you take yourself to be what you are not.
3.The ‘I am’ is a useful pointer, it shows where to seek, but not what to seek. Just have a good look at it. Once you are convinced that you cannot say truthfully about yourself anything except ‘I am’, and that nothing can be pointed at, can be your self, the need for the ‘I am’ is over - you are no longer intent on verbalizing what you are. All definitions apply to your body only and to its expressions. Once this obsession with the body goes, you will revert to your natural state. We discover the natural state by being earnest, by searching, enquiring, questioning daily and hourly, by giving one’s life to this discovery.
4.What makes the present so different? Obviously, my presence, I am real for I am always ‘now’, in the present, and what is with me now shares in my reality. The past is in memory, the future – in imagination. There is nothing in the present event itself that makes it stand out as real. A thing focused in the now is with me, for I am ever present, it is my own reality that I impart to the present event.
5.Refuse all thoughts except one: the thought ‘I am’. The mind will rebel in the beginning, but with patience and perseverance it will yield and keep quiet. Once you are quiet, things will begin to happen spontaneously and quite naturally, without any interference on your part.
6.To know the self as the only reality and all else as temporal and transient is freedom, peace and joy. It is all very simple. Instead of seeing things as imagined, learn to see them as they are. When you can see everything as it is, you will also see yourself as you are. It is like cleansing a mirror. The same mirror that shows you the world as it is, will also show you your own face. The thought ‘I am’ is the polishing cloth. Use it.
7.Why not turn away from the experience to the experiencer and realize the full import of the only true statement you can make: ‘I am’. Just keep in mind the feeling ‘I am’, merge in it, till your mind and feeling become one. By repeated attempts you will stumble on the right balance of attention and affection and your mind will be firmly established in the thought-feeling ‘I am’. Whatever you think, say or do, this sense of immutable and affectionate being remains as the ever-present background of the mind.
8.Do not bother about anything you want, or think, or do, just stay put in the thought and feeling, ‘I am’, focusing ‘I am’ firmly in your mind. All kinds of experience may come to you – remain unmoved in the knowledge that all perceivable is transient and only the ‘I am’ endures.
9.No way to self-realization is short or long, but some people are more in earnest and some are less. I can tell you about myself. I was a simple man, but I trusted my Guru. What he told me to do, I did. He told me to concentrate on ‘I am’ – I did. He told me that I am beyond all perceivables and conceivables – I believed. I gave my heart and soul, my entire attention and the whole of my spare time (I had to work to keep family alive). As a result of faith and earnest application, I realized my self (‘swarupa’) within three years. You may choose any way that suits you; your earnestness will determine the rate of progress. Establish yourself firmly in the awareness of ‘I am’. This is the beginning and also the end of all endeavour.
10.To know what you are you must first investigate and know what you are not. And to know what you are not, you must watch yourself carefully, rejecting all that does not necessarily go with basic fact ‘I am’. The ideas: I am born at a given place, at a given time, from my parents and now I am so-and-so, living at, married to, father of, employed by, and so on, are not inherent in the sense ‘I am’. Our usual attitude is ‘I am this’ or ‘that’. Separate consistently and perseveringly the ‘I am’ from ‘this’ or ‘that’ and try to feel what it means to be, just to ‘be’, without being ‘this’ or ‘that’. All our habits go against it and the task of fighting them is long and hard sometimes, but clear understanding helps a lot. The clearer you understand that on the level of the mind you can be described in negative terms only the quicker you will come to the end of your search and realize your limitless being.
11.When you see the world you see God. There is no seeing God apart from the world. Beyond the world to see God is to be God. The light by which you see the world, which is God is the tiny little spark: ‘I am’, apparently so small and yet the first and the last in every act of knowing and loving.
12.All is secondary to the tiny little thing which is the ‘I am’. Without the ‘I am’ there is nothing. All knowledge is about the ‘I am’. False ideas about this ‘I am’ lead to bondage, right knowledge leads to freedom and happiness. The ‘I am’ denotes the inner while ‘there is’ denotes the outer; both are based on the sense of being.
13.The sense of ‘I am’ is your own. You cannot part with it, but you can impart it to anything, as in saying, I am young, I am rich, and so on. But such self-identifications are patently false and the cause of bondage.
14.Give up all questions except one ‘who am I?’ After all the only fact you are sure of is that you ‘are’. The ‘I am’ is certain, the ‘I am this’ is not. Struggle to find out what you are in reality.
15.’I am’ itself is God, the seeking itself is God. In seeking you discover that you are neither the body nor the mind, and the love of the self in you is for the self in all. The two are one. The consciousness in you and the consciousness in me, apparently two, really one, seek unity and that is love. What do you love now? The ‘I am’. Give your heart and mind to it, think of nothing else. This when effortless and natural, is the highest state. In it love itself is the lover and the beloved.
16.The impersonal is real, the personal appears and disappears. ‘I am’ is the impersonal being. ‘I am this’ is the person. The person is relative and the pure being – the fundamental.
17 By focusing the mind on ‘I am’, on the sense of being, ‘I am so-and-so” dissolves; ‘am a witness only’ remains and that too submerges in ‘I am all’. Then the all becomes the One and the One – yourself, not to be separate from me. Abandon the idea of a separate ‘I’ and the question of ‘whose experience?’ will not arise. On a deeper level my experience is your experience. Dive deep within yourself and you will find it easily and simply. Go in the direction of ‘I am’.
18. Cling to the one thing that matters, hold on to ‘I am’ and let go all else. This is ‘sadhana’. In realization there is nothing to hold on to and nothing to forget. Everything is known, nothing is remembered.
19. At the root of everything is the feeling ‘I am’. The state of mind ‘there is a world’ is secondary, for to be I do not need the world, the world needs me.
20.Beyond the mind there is no such thing as experience. Experience is a dual state. You cannot talk of reality as an experience. Once this is understood, you will no longer look for being and becoming as separate and opposite. In reality they are one and separable, like roots and branches of the same tree. Both can only exist in the light of consciousness, which again arises in the wake of the sense ‘I am’. This is the primary fact. If you miss it you miss all.
21.Everything is a play of ideas. In the state free from ideation (nirvikalpa samadhi) nothing is perceived. The root idea is ‘I am’. It shatters the state of pure consciousness and is followed by the innumerable sensations and perceptions, feelings and ideas, which in their totality constitute God and His world. The ‘I am’ remains as the witness, but it is by the will of God that everything happens.
22.The concentration on ‘I am’ is a form of attention. Give your undivided attention to the most important thing in your life – yourself. Of your personal universe you are the center – without knowing the center what else can you know?
23. My advice to you is very simple – just remember yourself, ‘I am’, it is enough to heal your mind and take you beyond, just have some trust. I don’t mislead you. Why should I? Do I want anything from you? I wish you well – such is my nature. Why should I mislead you? Commonsense too will tell you that to fulfill a desire you must keep your mind on it. If you want to know your true nature, you must have yourself in mind all the time, until the secret of your being stands revealed.
24. It is right to say ‘I am’, but to say ‘I am this’, ‘I am that’, is a sign of not enquiring, not examining, of mental weakness or lethargy. Practice (sadhana) consists of reminding oneself forcibly of one’s pure ‘beingness’, of not being anything in particular, not a sum of particulars, not even the totality of all particulars, which make up a universe.
25.Be content with what you are sure of. And the only thing you can be sure of is ‘I am’. Stay with it and reject everything else. This is Yoga.
26 The one witness reflects itself in the countless bodies as ‘I am’. As long as the bodies, however subtle, last, the ‘I am’ appears as many. Beyond the body there is only the One.
27. When I say ‘I am’, I do not mean a separate entity with a body as its nucleus, I mean the totality of being, the ocean of consciousness, the entire universe of all that is known. I have nothing to desire for I am complete forever.
28. Words betray their hollowness. The real cannot be described, it must be experienced. I cannot find better words for what I know. What I say may sound ridiculous. But what the words try to convey is the highest truth. All is one, however much we quibble. And all is done to please the one source and goal of every desire, whom we all know as the ‘I am’.
29. When I repeat: ‘I am’, ‘I am’, I merely assert and re-assert an ever-present fact. You get tired of my words because you do not see the living truth behind them. Contact it and you will find the full meaning of words and of silence- both.
30. Self-remembrance, awareness of “I am’ ripens man powerfully and speedily. Give up all ideas about yourself and simply be. Stop making use of your mind and see what happens. Do this one thing thoroughly. That is all.
31.The fact is you. The only thing you know for sure is: ‘here and now I am’. Remove the ‘here and now’, the ‘I am’ remains unassailable.
32. All I can say is ‘I am’, all else is inference. But the inference has become a habit. Destroy all habits of thinking and sleeping. The sense ‘I am’ is a manifestation of a deeper cause, which you may call self, God, Reality or by any other name. The ‘I am’ is in the world but it is the key which can open the door out of the world.
33.Only your sense ‘I am’ though in the world, is not of the world. By no effort of logic you can change the “I am’ into ‘I am not’. In the very denial of your being you assert it. Once you realize that the world is your own projection, you are free of it. You need not free yourself of a world that does not exist, except in your imagination.
34.The sense ‘I am’ is composed of pure light and the sense of being. The ‘I’ is there even without the ‘am’. So is the pure light there whether you say ‘I’ or not. Become aware of that pure light and you will never lose it. The beingness in being, the awareness in consciousness, the interest in every experience – that is not describable, yet perfectly accessible, for there is nothing else.
35.’I am’ is ever fresh. You do need to remember in order to ‘be’ As a matter of fact, before you can experience anything, there must be the sense of being. At present your being is mixed up with experiencing. All you need to do is to unravel being from the tangle of experiences. Once you have known pure being, without being this or that, you will discern it among experiences, and you will no longer be misled by names and forms.
36. All talk of ‘gnana’ is a sign of ignorance. It is the mind that imagines that it does not know and then comes to know. Reality knows nothing of these contortions. Even the idea of God as the Creator is false. Do I owe my being to another being? Because ‘I am” all ‘is’.
37. My teacher told me to hold on to the sense ‘I am’ tenaciously and not to swerve from it even for a moment. I did my best to follow his advice and in a comparatively short time I realized within myself the truth of his teaching. All I did was to remember his teaching, his face, his words constantly. This brought an end to the mind, in the stillness of the mind I saw myself as I am – unbound.
38.One has to understand that the search for reality, God, Guru and the search for the self are the same, when one is found all are found. When ‘I am’ and ‘God is’ become in your mind indistinguishable, then something will happen and you will know without a trace of doubt that God is because you are, you are because God is. The two are one.
39.When ‘I am myself’ goes the ‘I am all’ comes. When the ‘I am all’ goes, ‘I am’ comes. When even ‘I am’ goes, reality alone is, and in it every ‘I am’ is preserved and glorified.
40. I am now 74 years old. And yet I feel that I am an infant. I feel clearly that in spite of all the changes I am a child. My Guru told me that the child, which is you even now, is your real self (‘swarupa’). Go back to that state of pure being, where the ‘I am’ is still in its purity before it gets contaminated with ‘this I am’ or ‘that I am’. Your burden is of false self-identification – abandon them all. My Guru told me – ‘Trust me. I tell you, you are divine. Take it as the absolute truth. Your joy is divine; your suffering is divine too. All comes from God. Remember it always. You are God, your will alone is done.’ I did believe him and soon realized how wonderfully true and accurate were his words. I did not condition my mind by thinking: ‘I am God, I am wonderful, I am beyond.’ I simply followed his instruction, which was to focus the mind on pure being, ‘I am’ and stay in it. I used to sit for hours together, with nothing but the ‘I am’ in my mind and soon peace and joy and a deep all-embracing love became my normal state. In it all disappeared - myself, my Guru, the life I lived, the world around me. Only peace remained and unfathomable silence.
41.Don’t you see that it is your very search for happiness that makes you feel miserable? Try the other way: indifferent to pain and pleasure, neither seeking, nor refusing, give all your attention to the level on which ‘I am’ is timelessly present. Soon you will realize that peace and happiness are in your very nature and it is only seeking them through some particular channels that disturbs. Avoid the disturbance, that is all. To seek there is no need, you would not seek what you already have. You yourself are God, the Supreme Reality. To begin with, trust me, trust the teacher. It enables you to make the first step - and then your trust is justified by your own experience.
42. The best is the simple feeling ‘I am’. Dwell on it patiently. Here patience is wisdom; don’t think of failure. There can be no failure in this undertaking.
43. No use rebelling against the very pattern of life. If you seek the immutable, go beyond experience. When I say remember ‘I am’ all the time, I mean come back to it repeatedly. No particular thought can be mind’s natural state, only silence. Not the idea of silence but silence itself. When the mind is in its natural state, it reverts to silence spontaneously after every experience, or rather, every experience happens against a background of silence. Now, what you have learnt here becomes the seed. You may forget it – apparently. But it will live and in due season sprout and grow and bring forth flowers and fruits. All will happen by itself. You need not do anything, only don’t prevent it.
44.First know your own mind and you will find that the question of other minds does not arise at all, for there are no other people. You are the common factor, the only link between the minds, Being is consciousness; ‘I am’ applies to all.
45.The ‘I am’ is a thought, while awareness is not a thought; there is no ‘I am aware’ in awareness. Consciousness is an attribute while awareness is not, one can be aware of being conscious, but not conscious of awareness. God is the totality of consciousness, but awareness is beyond all – being as well as non-being.
46. When you follow my advice and try to keep the mind on the notion of ‘I am’ only, you become fully aware of your mind and its vagaries. Awareness being lucid harmony (‘sattwa’) in action dissolves dullness and quietens the restlessness of the mind and gently but steadily changes its very substance. This change need not be spectacular; it maybe hardly noticeable; and yet it is a deep and fundamental shift from darkness to light from inadvertence to awareness.
47.There is the body and there is the Self, between them is the mind, in which the Self is reflected as ‘I am’. Because of the imperfections of the mind, its crudity and restlessness, lack of discernment and insight, it takes itself to be the body and not the Self. All that is needed is to purify the mind so that it can realize its identity with the Self. When the mind merges in the Self, the body presents no problems. It remains what it is, an instrument of cognition and action, the tool and the expression of the creative fire within.
48.The tangle which is entirely below the level of consciousness can be set right by being with yourself, the ‘I am’, by watching yourself in your daily life with alert interest with the intention to understand rather than to judge, in full acceptance of whatever may emerge, because it is there, you encourage the deep to come to the surface and enrich your life and consciousness with its captive energies. This is the great work of awareness; it removes obstacles and releases energies by understanding the nature of life and mind. Intelligence is the door to freedom and alert attention is the mother of intelligence.
49.There must be love in the relation between the person who says ‘I am’ and the observer of the ‘I am’. As long as the observer, the inner self; the ‘higher’ self considers himself apart from the observed, the ‘lower’ self, despises it and condemns it, the situation is hopeless. It is only when the observer (‘vyakta’) accepts the person (‘vyakti’) as a projection or manifestation of himself, and so to say, takes the self into the Self, the duality of ‘I’ and ‘this’ goes and the identity of the outer and the inner, the Supreme Reality manifests itself.
50.There is no ‘I’ apart from the body nor the world. The three appear and disappear together. At the root is the sense ‘I am’. Go beyond it. The idea ‘I-am-not-body’ is merely an antidote to the idea ‘I-am-the-body’, which is false. What is that ‘I am’? Unless you know yourself, what else can you know?
51.All hangs on the idea ‘I am’. Examine it very thoroughly. It lies at the root of every trouble. This ‘I am’ idea was not born with you. You could have lived very well without it. It came later due to your self-identification with the body. It created an illusion of separation where there was none. It made you a stranger in your own world alien and inimical. Without the sense of ‘I am’ life goes on. There are moments when we are without the sense of ‘I am’, at peace and happy. With the return of ‘I am’, trouble starts.
52.It is because the ‘I am’ is false that it wants to continue. Reality need not continue – knowing itself indestructible, it is indifferent to the destruction of forms and expressions. To strengthen and stabilize the ‘I am’ we do all sorts of things – all in vain for the ‘I am’ is being rebuilt from moment to moment. No ambition is spiritual. All ambitions are for the sake of ‘I am’. If you want to make real progress you must give up all ideas of personal attainment.
53.When I met my Guru, he told me:’ you are not what you take yourself to be. Find out what you are. Watch the sense ‘I am’, find you real self’ I obeyed him because I trusted him; I did as he told me. All my spare time I would spend looking at myself in silence. And what a difference it made, and how soon. It took me only three years to realize my true nature. My Guru died soon after I met him, but it made no difference. I remembered what he told me and persevered. The fruit of it is here, with me.
54.All directions are within the mind. I am not asking you to look in any particular direction. Just look away from all that happens in your mind and bring it to the feeling ‘I am’. The ‘I am’ is not a direction. It is the negation of all directions. Ultimately even the ‘I am’ will have to go for you need not keep asserting what is obvious. Bringing the mind to the feeling ‘I am’ merely helps turning the mind away from everything else.
55 Tirelessly I draw your attention to the one incontrovertible factor – that of being. Being needs no proofs – it proves itself. If only you go deep into the fact of being and discover the vastness and the glory, to which the ‘I am’ is the door, and cross the door and go beyond, your life will be full of happiness and light. Believe me, the effort needed is as nothing when compared with the discoveries arrived at.
56.Hold on to the sense ‘I am’ to the exclusion of everything else. When this mind becomes completely silent, it shines with a new light and vibrates with new knowledge. It all comes spontaneously; you need only to hold on to the ‘I am’.
57.Begin with feeling ‘I am’. All else is neither true nor false, it seems real when it appears, it disappears when it is denied. A transient thing is a mystery. The real is simple, open, clear and kind, beautiful and joyous. It is completely free of contradictions. It is ever-new, ever-fresh, and endlessly creative. Being and non-being, life and death, all distinctions merge in it.
58.The teacher tells the watcher you are not this, there is nothing yours in this, except the point of ‘I am’, which is the bridge between the watcher and his dream. ‘I am this’, ‘I am that’ is a dream, while pure ‘I am’ has the stamp of reality on it. You have tasted so many things – all came to naught. Only the sense ‘I am’ persisted – unchanged. Stay with the changeless among the changeful, until you are able to go beyond.
59.First you create a world, then the ‘I am’ becomes a person, who is not happy for various reasons. He goes out in search of happiness, meets a Guru who tells him’ You are not a person, find out who you are’. He does it and goes beyond.
60.He who is beyond time – is the un-nameable. A glowing ember moved round and round quickly enough, appears as a glowing circle. When the movement ceases, the ember remains. Similarly, the ‘I am’ in movement creates the world. The ‘I am’ at peace becomes the Absolute.
61.Immortality is freedom from the feeling: ‘I am’. Yet it is not extinction. On the contrary, it is a state infinitely more real, aware and happy than you can possibly think of. Only self-consciousness is no more. Who would remain even to say ‘I am the witness’? When there is no ‘I am’, where is the witness? In the timeless state there no self to take refuge in.
62.The witness is both unreal and real. The last remnant of the illusion, the first touch of the real. To say: I am only the witness is both false and true, false because of the ‘I am’, true because of the witness. It is better to say: ‘there is witnessing’. The moment you say ‘I am’, the entire universe comes into being along with its creator.
63.Trust the teacher. Take my case. My Guru ordered me to attend to the sense ‘I am’ and to give attention to nothing else. I just obeyed. I did not follow any particular course of breathing or meditation, or study of scriptures. Whatever happened I would turn away my attention from it and remain with the sense ‘I am’, it may look too simple, even crude. My only reason for doing it was that my Guru told me so. Yet it worked! Obedience is a powerful solvent of all desires and fears.
64.Look at the ‘I am’ as a sign of love between the inner and the outer, the real and the appearance. Just like in a dream all is different, except the sense of ‘I’, which enables you to say ‘I dreamt’, so does the sense of ‘I am’ enable you to say, ‘I am my real Self again. I do nothing nor is anything done to me. I am what I am and nothing can affect me. I appear to depend on everything, but in fact all depends on me’.
65. In the immensity of consciousness a light appears, a tiny point that moves rapidly and traces shapes, thoughts and feelings, concepts and ideas, like a pen writing on paper. And the ink that leaves a trace is memory. You are that tiny point and by your movement the world is ever re-created. Stop moving and there will be no world. Look within and you will find that the point of light is the reflection of the immensity of light in the body as the sense ‘I am’. There is only light all else appears.
66.To be the point of light (reflected as the sense ‘I am’) tracing the world is ‘turiya’. To be the light itself is ‘turiyatita’. But of what use are names when reality is so near?
67.The sense of ‘I am’ is both unreal and real. Unreal when I say ‘I am this or that’. It is real when we mean ‘I am not this nor that’. The ‘I am’ and the witness are not one, but without one the other cannot be.
68.Give your heart and mind to brooding over the ‘I am’, what is it, how is it, what is its source, its life, its meaning. It is very much like digging a well. You reject all that is not water, till you reach the life-giving spring.
69 The witness and consciousness appear and disappear together. The witness or the sense ‘I am’ too is transient but is given importance to break the spell of the known; the illusion that only the perceivable is real. Presently for you perception is primary and witnessing secondary, revert it to make witnessing primary and perception secondary (The ‘I am’ is just a device to revert).
70.Look at yourself steadily – it is enough. The door that locks you in is also the door that lets you out. The ‘I am’ is the door. Stay at it until it opens. As a matter of fact, it is open, only you are not at it. You are waiting at the non-existent painted doors, which will never open.
71.Keep the ‘I am’ in the focus of awareness, remember that you ‘are’, watch yourself ceaselessly and the unconscious will flow into the conscious without any special effort on your part. The person merges into the witness, the witness into awareness, awareness into pure being, yet identity is not lost, only its limitations are lost. It is transfigured and becomes the real Self, the ‘sadguru’, the eternal friend and guide. To go deeper, meditation is essential, the striving to go beyond the states of sleep, dream and waking. In the beginning the attempts are irregular, then recur more often, become regular, then continuous and intense, until all obstacles are conquered.
72.All that happens, happens in and to the mind, not to the source of the ‘I am’. Once you realize that all happens by itself (call it destiny, or the will of God or mere accident), you remain as witness only, understanding and enjoying, but not perturbed.
73.Before you can say ‘I am’, you must be there to say it. Being need not be self-conscious. You need not know to be, but you must ‘be’ to know.
74. The subtle body is created with the emergence of the ‘I am’ idea. The two are one. It is momentary. Real when present, unreal when over. Call it empirical, or actual, or factual. It is the reality of immediate experience, here and now, which cannot be denied.
You can question the description and the meaning, but not the event itself. Being and non-being alternate and their reality is momentary. The immutable reality lies beyond space and time. Realize the momentariness of being and non-being and be free from both.
75.The ‘I am’ is at the root of all appearance and the permanent link in the succession of events that we call life; but I am beyond the ‘I am’.
76. All the glories will come with mere dwelling on the feeling ‘I am’. It is the simple that is certain, not the complicated. Somehow, people do not trust the simple, the easy, the always available. Why not give a honest trial to what I say? It may look very small and insignificant, but it is like a seed that grows into a mighty tree. Give yourself a chance.
77.I was taught to give attention to my sense of ‘I am’ and I found it supremely effective. Therefore, I can speak of it with full confidence. But often people come with bodies, brains and minds so mishandled, perverted and weak that the state of formless attention is beyond them. In such cases some simpler token of earnestness (like repeating a ‘mantra’) is appropriate. After all it is the earnestness that is indispensable, the crucial factor. ‘Sadhana’ is only a vessel and it must be filled to be brim with earnestness, which is but love in action. For nothing can be done without love.
78.Delve deeply into the sense ‘I am’ and you surely discover that the perceiving center is universal, as universal as the light that illumines the world. All that happens in the universe happens to you, the silent witness. On the other hand, whatever is done, is done by you, the universal and inexhaustible energy.
79.Theoretically you always have a chance for self-realization. In practice a situation must arise, when all the factors necessary for self-realization are present. This need not discourage you. Your dwelling on the fact of ‘I am’ will soon create another chance. For attitude attracts opportunity. All you know is second-hand. Only ‘I am’ is first-hand and needs no proofs. Stay with it.
80.You have to go within. Whatever great things have happened in nature, however powerful, still they disappear right here. These situations appear and disappear. This is actually abstract, what is solid here is the knowledge ’I am’. The seen and seeing disappear. I tell this only to those who are prepared to listen. Whatever appears is bound to disappear.
81.The greatest appearance is the knowledge ‘I am’. It is invisible before the birth and after the death of the body, and while it is visible it is a solid thing. Many great sages have appeared and disappeared because of the powerful seed ‘I am’.
82 The knowledge ‘I am’ is time bound, all your knowledge sprouts from the concept that you are. This infinitesimal seed contains the universe. You miss the point; you do not understand me properly. This principle ‘I am’ I am telling you about again and again. All questions will be over once you solve the riddle of ‘I am’.
83.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the soul of the entire world. The witness of the knowledge ‘I am’ is prior to the knowledge ‘I am’. Try to understand yourself as you are, do not add any qualifications.
84.The ‘I am’ is the sum total of everything you perceive. It appears spontaneously and disappears, it has no dwelling place. It is like a dream world. Do not try to be something, even a spiritual person. You are the manifested. The tree is already there in the seed. Such is the ‘I am’. Just see it as it is.
85.You are separate from ‘I am’. ‘I am’ is itself an illusion. The knowledge ‘I am’ and the world are tricks of Maya. There is no substance in them. There are no words actually; you speak words for your satisfaction.
86.The ‘I amness’ is pulsating ‘I am, I am’. The feeling of ‘I amness’ is there because of the essence of the food body and vital breath, when these are gone the pulsation of ‘I amness’ will not be there. Beingness goes into no-beingness.
87.Because of the knowledge ‘I am’ we conduct all activities. In the morning when you wake up you get the first guaranty, that conviction of ‘I am’. Then because you are not in a position to sustain or tolerate that ‘I amness’ you bestir yourself. You get up and move around here and there and the activity starts.
88.That attention of ‘I amness’ is always there in the waking state, but we are not alert to watch it. There is no other attention to be followed. Be attentive to that attention ‘I am’.
89.Deal with the knowledge ‘I am’. This ‘I amness’ is there first, isn’t it? – primary. That ‘I’ must be there before you receive this sickness of ‘samskara’ (obstacles). Initially you have to understand that the knowledge ‘I am’ is a product of the food essence. When you know that you are, the world also is.
90.The Guru, God, your own knowledge – these three are one. If you know that, you become quiet Guru means knowledge and knowledge means ‘I am’. The ‘I amness’ is itself the Guru.
91.That state in which you were before you acquired this knowledge ‘I am’ is the real state. Only after you got this knowledge you identified with the body-mind. Whatever you have acquired, including the body-mind, that will go, and it is useless, and that is that. But your original state, before you acquired the body, is the Truth, is the Real state, and it will remain.
92.The beginning and the end of this understanding is the knowledge ‘I am’. The beginning of concepts started with the primary concept ‘I am’. Having wandered through all the concepts, and rejected them, you have to get rid of this last or the first concept.
93. To start with you have to be in that beingness or ‘I am’ without the body sense. You feel that you are the body now but when you abide in that beingness you will know then how you are without the body sense.. But don’t forget, at the same time; that body and the vital breath are very necessary. Once you understand these three entities correctly (body, vital breath and the message ‘I am’), then you are apart.
94.This knowledge ‘I am’ comes to you after your body is born, after that the body of childhood grows on its own and becomes old. What remains in the end is only one thing ‘I am’. So all through life you have to remember to investigate who is this ‘I am’. Otherwise birth and death will have no meaning for your beingness, because that beingness will also be dissolved after the death of the body.
95.To understand more clearly take the example of the dream world. You are in deep sleep and suddenly you feel ‘I am’ and that ‘I amness’ creates a dream world. Similarly this manifest world is created by that ‘I amness’. You will realize this later in the search for truth. The last progress will be for you to transcend this ‘I amness’ and get stabilized in the ultimate.
96.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the first ignorance and whatever knowledge you acquire with it is ignorance. Go back to the source of your ignorance.
97 Whatever is called God or Self is because there is the beingness, the feeling that ‘I am’. That is the fundamental principle, the basis of all your knowledge, but you are identifying yourself with the body.
98. With greatest interest you get absorbed in your Self. By giving attention only to your ‘I’ consciousness you can reach it. Without giving attention to the body but to the sense ‘I am’.
99.The consciousness that has come out of the five elements, through the body, is the quality of beingness, the knowledge that ‘I am’. That state of beingness will perish. There is no necessity for following any particular path, everything is the same. Think of that which is the center of the cosmos, don’t let your attention stray in any way from the knowledge of beingness, ‘I am’. Keep on knowing that ‘I am’ and through this insistence you will know the state you want to reach.
100.Before this knowledge ‘I am’ appeared on you, you were absolutely unattached. As soon as this knowledge dawned on you became attached to everything around you. Only that false ‘I’ is attached. Everything is just happening and that false ‘I’ is taking the credit for doing things.
101 All this conceptual cycle is created by you because you have the concept ‘I am’, which you must eradicate yourself. When you are in deep sleep is there any experience of pleasure and pain or birth and death? What does that mean? It means that concept ‘I am’
has vanished.
102. You must meditate on that ‘I am’ without holding on to the body and mind. As you nursed at your mother’s breast when you were a baby, so must you nurse at this ‘I am’, the knowledge of your beingness. Remember and meditate on this also ‘ I have no fear, I am beyond fear’. I am telling you that this fear will gradually lessen and will go completely, because I say so. The medicine for that fear is my word.
103. The Absolute state does not know itself, but the Absolute is offered and opportunity to understand itself through the food product, the ‘I am’. The very core of all atoms is permeated by that knowledge ‘I am’. Embrace all the atoms of the universe with the feeling that all of them have come inside us in the form of the knowledge ‘I am’.
104.You are so used to support of concepts that when your concepts leave you, although it is your true state, you get frightened and try to cling to them again. This is the meeting point of that immanent principle and the Eternal, the borderland. Why is the intellect puzzled here? That beingness which you are experiencing is melting away. When the concept of ‘I am’ goes, intellect also goes. So the intellect gets that frightening experience of ‘I am going’.
105.When you become one with that knowledge you will realize that the knowledge ‘I am’ is the very Guru of the universe. Don’t make use of anything except the knowledge ‘I am’. Forget everything else. Consider a magnificent tree with many branches and leaves. Go to the root and not the branches.
106. The ‘I am’ connotes the three states, waking, dream and deep sleep. ‘I am’ means that you are these three states, when these are gone the memory is also gone.
107. The appearance of the primary concept ‘I am’ is the beginning of duality. I started counting with myself, before this counting starts. That has no number. That is the Absolute. With that little movement ‘I am’ this counting started.
108. What you must witness is not your thoughts but the consciousness ‘I am’. Everything is an expression of the ‘I am,’ but you are not that; you are prior to the ‘I am’.
109.There is the true Awareness, from which comes consciousness, which is your feeling ‘I am’, be one with your consciousness and that is all that you can do, the Ultimate must come to you. You can only watch what happens – there is nothing you can do to get it.
110. The Guru is the same all-pervading consciousness ‘I am’. The Sat-Guru has gone beyond all these concepts, including the primary concept ‘I am’.
111.There is no proprietor behind that feeling of awareness. It only is, it is beyond description, and words cannot be of any use. That is the permanent state and this manifestation is only its movement. Nobody becomes a ‘Parabrahman’, nobody ‘can’ become a ‘Parabrahman’: It is. Before the knowledge ‘I am’ appeared on you, that is ‘Parabrahman’. If you revert properly, the consciousness ‘I am’ will disappear. There is no movement.
112. When you feel that you are separate from the feeling ‘I am’ isn’t there something or someone who knows that there is a difference? Find out, are you separate unknowingly?
Are we all here because of our volition to be born or has this knowingness appeared in us unknowingly? This beingness has come to you without your knowledge, but you are using it according to your own volition. I want to sentence that inviduality to death. Is it not justice that I pronounce this sentence? So think carefully. The individuality must go. ‘Parabrahman’ is purest justice and Truth.
113.There are various types of charity, but the greatest charity is the renunciation of the knowledge ‘I am’. When you give that up you escape birth and death. Waking state represents activity; deep sleep represents peace, quiet. When these two are present it means ‘I am’ is there, but you the Absolute are neither the waking state, deep sleep nor
‘I amness’.
114.What else is there except the touch of ‘I am’? Why do you worry about discovering Maya and Brahma and all that? Understand what this principle ‘I am’ is and you are finished. That ‘I am’ is in bondage because of concepts.
115 I want to take you to that ‘I am’ concept which is the last outpost of illusion and get rid of it. Understand the quality of these concepts.
116. What capital is available to you? Only that ‘I am’, it is a product of this five-elemental food essence. First you become the consciousness, then you realize that you are manifestation.
117.The Bhagavad-Gita says that we have five senses of knowledge; these are very subtle. More subtle than the senses is the mind, subtler than the mind is the intelligence, and subtler than these is the vital breath. And yet more subtle is ‘He’, the beingness, the ‘I am’.
118. You know you are sitting here. Be attentive to that knowledge only. Just be in your beingness. That knowingness ‘I am’ has created the entire universe. Hold on to that; nothing has to be done. Once you recognize that principle it becomes tranquil. Become one with that and all your needs will be satisfied.
119.I have been very open, very explicit. I’ve been telling you that you are not the body, you are that knowledge only and that vital breath is your conveyance, a tool by which you carry out your activities, and the knowledge ‘I am’ is very subtle. Because of your knowledge, you are and world is.
120. Don’t get involved in anything stay in the consciousness ‘I am’ and don’t go on a intellectual binge again. Consciousness indicates to the consciousness, expounds the knowledge; but you will not dwell there, you embrace the body. The knowledge ‘I am’ tells the knowledge about itself to the ‘I am’ only.
121.You are worrying because of the intellect, but you have only to continue in that ‘I am’ with faith, you have nothing else to do. You are likely to miss that incident if you try to use your intellect. Just let it happen. Hold on to the feeling ‘I am’, don’t pollute that state by holding on to the body sense.
122. Maya is the primary source of illusion. At that point, love for the Self begins: ‘I am’, the love to be. Its expression is all this manifestation.
123. After deep sleep, as soon as consciousness dawns on you of ‘I am’ – that is the witness. Before that moment you did not know that you are, there was no witness, no knowledge of ‘I am’.
124. As long as you identify with the body-mind you are conditioned. Once you stabilize in the knowledge ‘I am’ unconditionally you are the manifest ‘I amness’ – no more an individual. In the manifested state of ‘I amness’ there is no question of your doing, because you are no more an individual. Whatever happens, happens in your consciousness. Whatever happens through this, you also know it will happen, but there is no question of doing or being anything.
125.In the womb that knowingness is ignorant of its existence, the ‘I am’ is not present but the ‘I am’ principle is started there. All things happen unknowingly, but even to understand that is very difficult, it is beyond our comprehension.
126.The first film is when that knowingness appears on you. In that knowledge ‘I am’ all is contained. Only in that film when the film started knowing itself, ‘I am’; then you came to know all this. Did you know anything before?
127.That knowledge ‘I am’ is born out of love, but the illusion has taken such hold of it that love for the ‘I amness’ has gone into the background. To stay with it has become increasingly difficult. Without the manifestation the love was total.
128 You are a man because you identify with the body. If you do not identify with the body, what sex are you? After leaving the body, the vital breath and the ‘I am’ merge into the substratum. Then where is man or woman?
129. In my original true state I have no form and no thoughts. I didn’t know I was, but suddenly another state appeared in which I had a form and thought, ‘I am’. How did this appear? The one who explains how these appearances have come about is the Sat-Guru.
130 Your first step is beingness: embrace the knowledge ‘I am’ be that. I am trying to speak of my most intimate secrets. Just as the dream world, uncalled for, has appeared and you observe it, similarly this world, uncalled for, has appeared and you are compelled to observe it. Just observe. Spontaneously, unknowingly, your beingness has appeared. Knowingly you don’t know ‘ Now I am going to be’; only after the formation of ‘I amness’ do you know ‘I am’.
131.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the film, the destiny. Finally what is our destiny? It is that birth chemical, that film in which everything is recorded and everything is happening. Where are ‘you’ in this?
132.What do you mean by study? That means you are only trying to remember the concepts. What I am saying is that you become concept-free. Put an ax to the concepts, including the concept ‘I am’.
133.This knowledge ‘I am’ has appeared out of love and that love comes out of existence. When this knowledge has dawned on the Self it is absolutely happy but after the child is two or three years old, gradually it gets involved in ‘I’ and ‘mine’, and gradually he loses hold of the joy ‘I am’. The result of this involvement is that he comes to the conclusion that he was born and is going to die.
134.There is no separate God to propitiate and get things done according to our will. Without doing anything you have the knowledge ‘I am’. Immense courage, heroism and conviction that you are – that is ‘ishwara, that is you. I am giving you instructions regarding your beginningless being but you prefer to be that monkey form. You are not prepared to leave that form.
135.The manifestation of the dynamic immanent Spirit is in the form of the guna (quality) ‘I am’, it understands itself as ‘I am’. Then this guna involves itself in the activities in the world through the three gunas. That is the quality.
136. ‘I am’ is a quality, an attribute, indicating beingness, but the Self is not a quality. For that Ultimate Self no worldly knowledge is necessary. Words are not called for. But for the sustenance of this beingness, these words and worldly knowledge is necessary.
137.You are dependant for your living on the strength of your body that it gets from the food you eat and the essence of this food and food body is this consciousness ‘I am’. Your beingness is within you not somewhere else.
138. In the traditional view Brahman is supposed to have created the world, Vishnu to maintain it and Shiva to destroy it. Is not this Brahman who creates the world the same as the Brahma-randhra out of which the sense of ‘I am’ comes? Who is this Brahman other than the ‘I amness’.
139.The sense of ‘I am’ is always there; only when it identifies with the body it is called the ego.
140.The message ‘I am’ does not have any form, design, or color. So long as ‘I am’is, this experience of manifestation is, once that ‘I amness’ disappears there is no experience. Once this message ‘I am’ appears in insect, animal, or human being, immediately the manifestation occurs with that beingness. Inside and outside is full of manifestation. These talks are not for general consumption, for the masses.
141. The message ‘I am’ has no form, it is only a food container. It is there, it has meaning, you cannot perceive it, observe it. The message ‘I am’ is time-bound. The principle to which ‘I am’ refers is beyond time, timeless, eternal.
142.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the same, whether it is an insect, worm, human being or an avatar (being of the highest order); the basic consciousness is the same in all of these.
143. There is no reason why this consciousness came about, but once it comes about, it cannot stand still, consciousness is the same as movement. That movement takes place through the three gunas, which are inherent in this knowledge ‘I am’. All movement takes place through these gunas and this consciousness keeps on humming.
144. Satva is only the essence of the five elements and in that is the knowledge ‘I am’. All that is still of the five elements, so how did this come about? Then my Guru told me, ‘this is what you are’, the whole story; so from my own experience I know that it is all ignorance.
145.My Guru pointed out to me that originally I had nothing to do with all this and all I have with which to solve this mystery of life is the knowledge ‘I am’; without that there is nothing. So I got hold of it, as my Guru told me, and then I wanted to find out how this body aspect came about without my knowledge and how alone on that any other knowledge come about, and that again is a result of five elements. Therefore, whatever anybody thinks he has is sheer ignorance, and I know it from my own experience.
146. If this is ignorance, then where is my beingness? My beingness is in a town which is no-town, in a place which is no-place. How did this come about? Because of this knowledge ‘I am’, which is ignorance. Maya, which came about suddenly, without my asking. Once having come about, this Maya liked what it had created and it wanted that beingness to last for all time. Maya embraced it with such fierceness, that, at any cost, it wants to prolong the existence of that beingness as long as it can.
147.The beingness, the ‘I am’, is merely an instrument, it is not you. It is an instrument of knowledge, and that great instrument of knowledge is called God, which is the quality of the food essence. Out of that alone you will be able to see everything else.
148.One who is completely rid of coming and going, and finally, one who is completely rid of one’s very own concept that ‘I am’, is completely liberated.
149.Brahman means the emanation of the world, simultaneously confirming that ‘I am’. In this Brahman everything is illusion, but who understands that? The principle that understands, realizes, and witnesses is the ‘Parabrahman’. Witnessing happens to the ‘Parabrahman’. In this manifest state everything is ever changing, nothing is permanent, and all is illusion.
150.When you are in deep sleep and you feel that you are awake, the dream world appears simultaneously. With the ‘I am’, the world appears in the waking and dream states.
151.Concepts come into the sense of being ‘I am’ because of the vital breath that causes the mind flow. Mind means words, so thoughts are there – they are the concepts. Look at your root, the child consciousness, and finish it off.
152.It is only during the duration of the beingness that the world and creation is. This power is the faith in the primordial concept ‘I am’, and that is the concept that weaves the web of creation. The entire manifestation is an appearance in this concept.
153. You must come to a firm decision. You must forget the thought that you are the body and be only the knowledge ‘I am’, which has no form, no name. Just be. When you stabilize in that beingness it will give all the knowledge and all the secrets to you, and when the secrets are given to you, you transcend the beingness, and you, the Absolute will know that you are also not the consciousness. Having gained all this knowledge, having understood what is what, a kind of quietude prevails, a tranquility. Beingness is transcended, but beingness is available.
154. On my true, whole, homogenous state just a small ripple appeared, the news came, ‘I am’. That news made all the difference, and I started knowing this; but now I have known my true state, so I understand my true state first, and then I understand that this ripple is coming and going on my true state. While in your case, you take interest in the ripple and don’t take interest in your true state.
155. The consciousness that ‘I am’ has created, and sustains, all the wonders in the world for which men take credit; on the other hand this consciousness has no control over itself. The principle out of which you have sprouted has tremendous powers. Lord Krishna has said, ‘You worship me, be devoted to me’, this means what? The knowledge ‘I am’ which is indwelling in you worship that only.
156. Lord Krishna said ‘All are my expressions’. This knowledge ‘I am’ in each species is myself. The very life force – luminous, bright, radiant, indwelling principle is myself.
157.When you got yourself separated from the Absolute with this identity ‘I am’, you felt fragmented, isolated, and that is why your demands started. In the Absolute there are no needs, Only the Absolute prevails. The truth is total Brahman only, nothing else but Brahman. In a total Brahman state arose the touch of beingness, ‘I am’, and with that, separation started, otherness has come. But this ‘I amness’ is not just a small principle, that itself is the ‘moolmaya’, the primary illusion.
158.If you want to remember this visit, if you have love for me, remember this ‘I am’ principle and without the command or direction of this principle, do nothing.
159.The ‘Maya’ is so powerful that it gets you completely wrapped up in it. ‘Maya’ means ‘I am’, ‘I love to be’, It has no identity except love. That knowledge of ‘I am’ is the greatest foe and the greatest friend. Although it might be your greatest enemy, if you propitiate it properly, it will turn around and lead you to the highest state.
160. Death is considered to be a traumatic experience, but understand what happens. That which has been born, the knowledge ‘I am’, will end. That knowledge, which was limited by this body, will then become unlimited, so what is to be feared?
161.That feeling of love must be understood and then love will unfold itself. Love for the Self, this consciousness, ‘I am’, those who have understood this as the true love, have themselves become love. All has merged in them.
162.This illness that I have got is not separate from what exists as the body, breath and the knowledge ‘I am’. This is one bundle, which has been created; whatever happens is contained in that bundle. I have been separate from it before conception, and will continue to be separate from what has been created.
163.What was conceived has grown physically, and some of the expressions of this knowledge ‘I am’ have achieved tremendous things. At the end of the time span the magnificent personalities, and whatever they have achieved – both have disappeared, however long the time, there is an end to it.
164.What is wrong is that you consider yourself to be limited to this body and shape. What knowledge I try to give is given to the knowledge ‘I am’ in each of you, which is the same. If you try to get the knowledge as an individual you will never get it.
165. That ‘I am’ is a concept is to be understood while the concept is there. Once it merges in the original state, who (or what) is there who wants to know? The illusory entity has disappeared.
166.Whatever I am telling you is not the truth, because it has come out of this ‘I am’. The truth is beyond expression. I am taking you again and again to the source of the spring. Once you go to the source you will come to know there is no water, water is the news ‘I am’.
167.Understand that it is not the individual that has consciousness; it is the consciousness which assumes innumerable forms. That something which is born or which will die is purely imaginary. It is the child of a barren woman. In the absence of this basic concept ‘I am’, there is no thought, there is no consciousness.
168.Any embodied person with the knowledge ‘I am’ carries on his activities in the world with the name only. That inner core, the ‘I am’ has no shackles. Once it is understood that I am that ‘I am’ only, and not this shackled form, then no liberation is called for, that itself is liberation.
169.In this spiritual hierarchy, from the grossest to the subtlest, you are the subtlest. How can this be realized? The very base is that you don’t know you are, and suddenly the feeling of ‘I amness’ appears. The moment it appears you see space, mental space; that subtle sky-like space, stabilize there. You are that. When you are able to stabilize in that space, you are space only. When this space-like identity ‘I am’ disappears, the space will also disappear, there is no space. When that space-like ‘I am’ goes into oblivion, that is the eternal state, ‘nirguna’, no form, no beingness. Actually, what did happen there? This message ‘I am’ was no message. Dealing with this aspect, I cannot talk much because there is no scope to put it in words.
170.Most essential is that knowledge ‘I am’. Claim it, appropriate it as your own. If that is not there, nothing is. Knowledge of all stages will be obtained only with the aid of this knowledge ‘I am’ From the Absolute no-knowing state, spontaneously this consciousness ‘I am’ has appeared – no reason, no cause.
171.This passing show maybe likened to the following situation: suppose I was well all along, then suddenly I was sick and the doctor gave me medicine. After three days my fever was gone. So this stage of fever for three days is the ‘I am’ consciousness. Exactly like that – a passing show, a time-bound state.
172. The knowledge ‘I am’ is not a thought but observes thought. The innermost, subtlest principle is that gnawing principle ‘I am, I am’ without words, by which you know you are. It has no form or image; it is only beingness, the love to be.
173.The ‘I am’ and the Absolute are not two. In the Absolute the ‘I amness’ comes and then the experience takes place. Whatever is happening, from the Absolute standpoint, without the knowledge ‘I am’, is very profound, unlimited, and expansive
174. Investigate that concept ‘I am.’ In the process of trying to find out your identity or this spiritual search, all will happen in the realm of this consciousness. You finally stumble on, or culminate into the Absolute ‘Parabrahman’ state, which is desireless.
175.Before the idea ‘I am’ sprouted, you are, but you don’t know you are. Subsequent to that there have been many happenings with which you have started decorating yourself. You try to derive the meaning of yourself out of subsequent words, happenings, and the meaning of words…that is not you…give it up. You are prior to the idea ‘I am’. Camp yourself there, prior to the words ‘I am’.
176.From deep sleep to the waking state, what is it? It is the ‘I am’ state with no words, later the words start flowing and you get involved with the meaning of the words and carry out your worldly life with the meaning of those words – that is the mind. But before the ‘I am’ and waking state, that borderline, there you have to be.
177. At most I would say ‘ you worship that ‘I am’ principle, be one with it and that would disclose all the knowledge’ That’s all I will say, but the subtlest part is this, from deep sleep to waking state. To abide in that you must have an intensely peaceful state. In that state witnessing of the waking state happens. You must go to that limit, but it is very difficult.
178.If you have regard for me remember my words. The knowledge ‘I am’ is the greatest God, the Guru, be one with that, be intimate with it. That itself will bless you with all the knowledge relevant for you in the proliferation of that knowledge, it will lead you to the state which is eternal.
179. What is this knowingness? It is the stamp or registration of the booking ‘I am’. You are booking a flat, which is under construction but where is the flat? It is only the booking. Similarly this ‘I am’ is only booking, it represents your Absolute state.
180. Discrimination is very necessary to understand what I am saying. It is only after the arrival of consciousness that we try to understand ourselves. Consciousness is the so-called birth, birth means the three aspects: waking state, deep sleep and the knowledge ‘I am’. Once I understand what this birth is, then the whole mystery is solved. Since I have thoroughly known what this birth principle is, I will know very well at that happening of so-called death. I shall observe the departure of the vital breath, the language and the ‘ I amness”, there is no question of death.
181.Who is going to give you eternal peace? It is only the sun, that ‘I am’. If you embrace that Self-effulgent sun everything else will go, but you will prevail eternally.
182.All your experiences and visions depend on your knowledge ‘I am’ and this itself is going to dissolve. For this knowledge there are no customers, no devotees, because they want something concrete in their hand, but when your knowingness itself is going to dissolve, is it possible to hold on to something?
183. You live in the house but the house is not yourself. Similarly the knowledge ‘I am’ is in the body, but it is not the body. When the knowledge ‘I am’ is not there do you perceive or observe anything?. Knowingness is knowledge and no-knowingness is also knowledge, but it has no form. Call that knowledge ‘I am’ as your Self; don’t call the body as knowledge. The knowledge ‘I am’ is the primary God, meditate on that only.
184.All those praises sung by the ‘Vedas’ are only for that tiny little pinch ‘I am’. The moment you start making a design of that ‘ I amness’ you are getting into deep waters. This incense holder is silver; you have the knowledge that it is silver. What is the shape, color, or design of that knowledge? If all knowledge is formless, could there be a form, design or color to the knowledge ‘I am’? Could it be subject to sin or merit?
185.I never seek anything from anybody else. Whatever I want to get, I want to get out of my own being, I worship that very principle ‘I am’ and demand what I want out of that; because of that all these things are coming.
186 In this process you, as an individual, are not left at all. Try to understand that ‘I am’ is a product of the ‘satwa guna’, food essence product. When you throw out all the concepts, including your primary concept (‘I am’), then whatever is, is. Stay put in quietude.
187. All this profound talk is nothing but mental entertainment. As you go further into spirituality you will realize that ‘I am’ is the very God or soul of an infinite number of universes, but the ‘I am’ is again entertainment. All my talks are conceptual entertainment.
188.In the first few years the primary concept ‘I am’ was there, but in a dormant condition. Later on it started knowing itself. The ‘jnani’ state is like the child, when the child was not knowing itself. The apparatus through which that knowingness expresses itself is now quite different, but the principle is the same.
189.The world of ‘Maya’ is built up of concepts only. I cannot charge the world with giving me the pain; the whole cause of the pain is the knowingness ‘I am’. When this knowledge was not there was there any pain or pleasure?
190.All your moments of spirituality are based on the ‘I am the body’ idea. This knowledge ‘I am’ is going to remain for a short period. This will be very clear to you when you remain in your real position. Until then accept whatever concepts of spirituality you like. Until you know your true state you will accept all the hearsays because you don’t know the truth.
191 You must maintain this knowledge ‘I am’ in proper order. All the dirt, which is not the towel, should be removed. Similarly ‘I am’ is the tool through which you get all the knowledge. You worship that ‘I am’, remove all the adulteration, the dirt.
192. That knowingness alone points out all the dirt which is imposed on it. Even the space is not as pure as the knowledge ‘I am’. Innately the world is very pure, it is rendered dirty because you identify with the body. Since you do not recognize your ‘I amness’ in its purity, you refer to various books and saints to get an identity.
193. To know these senses, to understand these secrets, you surrender to that very principle ‘I am’, and that consciousness alone will lead you to this. Presently stabilize in the consciousness. If you don’t do that, your very concepts will be very dangerous to you – they will throttle you to death. The knowledge you are the is very source of all energy, the source of all Gods, of all types of knowledge. This is the simplest method, you know you are, just be there.
194.You came here and I talk to you but I am not concerned whether you come or go. I am totally independent. I, as the Absolute, do not need the consciousness. Total independence is merely to apprehend and understand. My apparent dependence is on this consciousness which says ‘I am’. It is this sentience which enables me to perceive you. This concept I did not have but even then I existed. I was there before this consciousness appeared.
195. When did this process of observing start? It started with the arrival of the waking state, deep sleep state and the knowledge ‘I am’, all rolled into one ‘I am’. This is known as birth. With the so-called birth this triad has come, and with its arrival observation started. Everyday it is going on. The moment the ‘I amness’ comes it is being used for experiencing, observing etc. Prior to the happening of this birth, where was the ‘I amness’? It was not there.
196.You know you are. Because you know you are, everything is happening. Go to that knowledge ‘I am’. When you understand what that ‘I amness’ is, then the shell of mystery is broken.
197.Pose the question from the standpoint that you are only the knowledge ‘I am’. The primary ignorance is about our ‘I amness’; we have taken it as the Ultimate, that is ignorance. We presume that this consciousness is the eternal, the Ultimate, that is the mistake. This ‘I am’ principle is there provided the waking state and deep sleep are there. I am not the waking state, I am not the deep sleep – therefore I, the Absolute, am not that ‘I am’. Leave aside this triad, what are you? Understand clearly, when you keep aside the very instrument of questioning, where is the question? Which you? You have removed the ‘you’.
198. I repeatedly tell you that there is nothing save this consciousness, the knowledge ‘I am’ – if you feel like worshipping something, worship that. I am giving blessings. Blessings mean what? I am giving confidence and courage.
199.Can any of your concepts grasp the total, the Ultimate? Have you understood that knowledge itself is ignorance? If it were real it would have been there eternally – it would not have had a beginning and an end. Now the experience ‘I am’ is felt, earlier that experience was not. When it was not, no proof was called for, but once it is, lots of proof is required.
200. One is the Absolute, two is consciousness, three is space. Where there was no knowledge ‘I am’ that is number one, later on there is the sense ‘I am’ that is number two, then there is space – number three.
201.Increase the conviction that you are the formless consciousness. You develop your firm conviction that you are the total manifesting universal consciousness. There is nobody who can have the knowledge of the Truth, the Eternal. It is one’s eternal true state, but is not a knowledgeable state – you cannot know It. So-called knowledge is boundless and plenty in the state of attributes, ‘I am’. In this body is the knowledge ‘I am’. When the body drops down, the knowledge ‘I am’ will subside there only – what remains is the Absolute.
202.Be one with the knowledge ‘I am’, the source of sentience, the beingness itself. If you are seeking that peace which is priceless, it can only be in establishing yourself in the consciousness with steadfast conviction. By conviction I mean never doubted, firm, unshakable, never wavering – have that kind of conviction in your beingness. Think of nothing else, pray to nothing else, ‘Atma Prem’, because of it everything is.
203.In that body the ‘I am’ is ticking – that is the Guru. You worship that ‘I am’ principle and surrender to that Guru and that Guru will give all the grace. What you call ‘I am’ and birth, you are not that, it is material. The Ultimate knowledge does not have any knowledge. This knowledge ‘I am’ has appeared spontaneously, as a result of the body. See it as it is, understand it as it is.
204.This ‘I am’ is a concept also, is it not? And you want to hang on to this concept also. This ‘I amness’ is not going to remain in your association, and when it goes, everything relating to that ‘I amness’ goes. When this is the state of affairs, what is the use of trying to gain or assimilate knowledge? You are standing on a concept ‘I am’ and trying to paint that with another concept.
205.I have experienced all four kinds of speech and transcended them. Rarely will anybody follow this hierarchy to stabilize in the consciousness and transcend consciousness. Starting from ‘Vaikhari’ (word), normally we listen to words; from ‘Vaikhari’ we go to ‘Madhyama’ (mind-thought); in watching the mind we are in ‘Pashayanti’ where the concept formation takes place and from there to ‘Para’ (‘I am’ – without words), and finally from ‘Para’ to prior to consciousness. This is the line to follow, but only a rare one follows it – receding, reversing.
206. You must possess that confirmation that you are formless, designless and not only rely on meditation. Always insist on that you are formless, free and not conditioned. You must hammer on this constantly, that is the practice. You must have a strong conviction that conviction means practicing. That conviction means not only ‘I am’ but it means I am free from the ‘I am’ also.
207.Normally in the name of spirituality, knowledge is expounded. Knowledge is in the realm of five elements and it is talked about as real or unreal so long as the knowledge ‘I am’ is there, it is a product of the knowledge ‘I am’. A ‘jnani’ is that state from which the witnessing of the knowledge ‘I am’ takes place. In that ‘jnani’ state there is no touch of ‘I amness’ (it is a quality-less state) and it is not knowledge – knowledge means ‘I amness’.
208. ‘I am’ is only a few letters. Has anyone been able to keep this ‘I am’ in his pocket for all time? If whoever feels that ‘I am’ had knowledge, would he have cared to become this ‘I am’? No, he would have said ‘I don’t want this consciousness’. You are unreal – you know that you are – that is also unreal. This sense of presence is an untruth, it is like a dream.
209. The ‘Linga-deha’ is the seed, the chemical, the product of the five elemental essences which give rise to and sustain the consciousness ‘I am’. Just like the seed of a tree, that seed latently contains all future manifestations and expressions of the tree that will sprout out of the seed. You take a fountain pen and on the paper you put a drop of ink, so that drop is the ‘Linga-deha’. That drop is the moment of conception; its expression is the thought-free state, like space, in the knowingness state. That ‘Linga-deha’, that little drop, and the knowledge ‘I am’ is the same.
210.It is not important where you are, once you are established in the ‘I am’. It is like space – it neither comes nor goes; just as when you demolish the walls of a building only space remains.
211.If you do not have the knowledge ‘I am’ who is going to seek? You must be, only then the search can begin. Remember the knowledge ‘ I am’ – that alone pervades everything – be only that and give up the rest.
212.At the moment of death it is the culmination or termination of the Self-experience, ‘I am’. After the termination of ‘I amness’ there is no experience of knowingness or not knowingness, the knowingness is a quality of the material stuff.
213.All this knowledge has dawned on me, I am not the knowledge. The knowledge ‘I am’, and all its manifestations, are understood. In understanding, I am not That.
214.To establish oneself firmly in the awareness ‘ I am’, it is not necessary to think ‘ I am’, ‘I am’. Is it necessary to think you are sitting here? You know that you are sitting here. Whatever name and form there is belongs to that material and that material is not you. Do you analyze the problem and with the firm conviction decide that you are not the material? When the material disintegrates what does the name refer to? Does it have any significance? Only one in ten million goes to the crux of the matter, analyzes what it is, comes to a conclusion, and gets liberated, all by himself. The one who gets liberated is the consciousness, there is no entity.
215. As long as you are wearing this concept ‘I am’ you will be involved with all the concepts. When this concept ‘I am’ departs there will be no memory left that ‘I was’ and ‘I had’ those experiences; the very memory will be erased.
216. All this process of communication, expounding, etc., will go on so long as this conscious presence is available, and all this is to merely satisfy the concept ‘I am’, and you the Absolute, are not the primary concept ‘I am’.
217.That which you like most – that itself is ‘I am’, the conscious presence – but that is not going to last forever. When the body drops off and the consciousness is extinguished, you need to do nothing. With this understanding do what you like in the world.
218.The only spiritual way to understanding you true nature is to find out the source of this concept ‘I am’. Before the sense of presence arrived I was in that state in which the concept of time was never there. So what is born? It is the concept of time, and that event which is birth, living, and death together constitute nothing but time, duration.
219.When you are the space you are no more the body, but whatever is contained in that space you are. You are now manifest – whatever is known – the space. This space is known as ‘chidakash’. In ‘chidakash this knowingness is ‘I am’. In the highest ‘Paramakash’ there is no is or is not, It transcends everything.
220.The Guru tells you ‘Get rid of concepts, just be yourself’. The seeker having understood what the Guru said, gets rid of the concepts, and now, as the first step, the seeker dwells in the state ‘I am’, just being. First of all there is the knowingness ‘I am’, without words, with that knowingness the world is. Now when the seeker goes into meditation that knowingness goes into no-knowingness. This is the highest state in the hierarchy when the body aspect is there because this knowing and no-knowing are aspects of the body, and body means consciousness, and in the realm of consciousness, knowingness and no-knowingness exist. The Absolute transcends knowingness and no-knowingness. So, no-knowingness is the highest in the hierarchy of spirituality, and the destination is the transcendence of knowingness and no-knowingness.
221.You must know what this ‘I am’ principle is. It appears spontaneously and with its appearance begins the riddle of conceptual life.
222.In deep sleep, consciousness was in a dormant condition, there were no bodies, no concepts, no encumbrances. Upon the arrival of this apparently wakeful state, with the arrival of the concept ‘I am’, the love of ‘I am’ woke up. That itself is ‘Maya’, illusion.
223.The emergence of this beingness itself constitutes time. Everything is beingness, but I, the Absolute, am not that. In meditation there was space, when suddenly two forms appeared out of no-form, ‘Prakriti’ and ‘Purusha’ and the quintessence of these forms was the knowledge ‘I am’.
224.There are no individuals; there are only food bodies with the knowledge ‘I am’. There is no difference between and ant, human being and ‘Iswara’ they are of the same quality. The body of an ant is small; an elephant’s is large. The strength is different, because of size, but the life-force is the same. For knowledge the body is necessary.
225.When this beingness goes, the Absolute will not know ‘I am’. Appearance and disappearance, birth and death, these are qualities of beingness; they are not your qualities.
226.Who is talking?, who is walking?, who is sitting? These are the expressions of the chemical ‘I am’. Are you that chemical? You talk about heaven and hell, this Mahatma or that one, but how about you? Who are you? You are not this chemical ‘I am’.
227. Not an individual but the knowledge ‘I am’ must go to its source. Out of the no-being state comes the beingness. It comes as quietly as twilight, just a feel of ‘I am’ and then suddenly the space is there. In the space, the movement starts with the air, the fire, the water, and the earth. All these five elements are you only. Out of your consciousness all this has happened. There is no individual. There is only you, the total functioning is you, the consciousness is you.
228.Ultimately one must go beyond knowledge, but the knowledge must come, and knowledge can come by constant meditation. By meditating, the knowledge ‘I am’ gradually settles down and merges with universal knowledge, and thereby becomes totally free, like the sky or the space. It is not possible for you to acquire knowledge, you ‘are’ knowledge. You are what you are seeking.
229. How amusing it is to see someone who thinks of himself as an individual, who thinks of himself as a doer or achiever. Whatever is happening and the experiencing of the happening, takes place in this consciousness when the ‘I am’ arises.
230.Get to know that ‘I am’ without words, which arises in the morning. Knowing the Self, abiding in the Self-knowledge, is not a mere intellectual knowing. You must be that, and you should not move away from it. Remain firm.
231.In the body the indwelling principle is the consciousness. Abiding in the consciousness, it became all manifestation. Now transcendence of the consciousness has also occurred. With the appearance of consciousness, the Absolute knows it is, ‘I am’. This is the experience. There are other experiences now, in this time factor, but experiences are gradually dropping off, including this primary experience ‘I am’. It is only the consciousness that is going to disappear; the Absolute is always there.
232.Because the ‘I am’ principle is there, it is moving all over. To recognize it, you put on various uniforms in order to give it identity, but the principle is already there, and because of that principle you are engaging in various activities. Unless you wear the uniform (the body) you will not be able to conduct any activities. Once you discard this ‘I amness’ uniform, what remains is the ‘Parabrahman”. That which is eternally current is the ‘Parabrahman’.
233.In this body is the subtle principle ‘I am’, that principle witnesses all this. You are not the words. Words are the expression of space, they are not yours. Still further you are not that ‘I am’
234. When you began knowing that you are, you did a lot of mischief, but when the ‘I am’ is not there, there is no question of mischief.
235. The ‘I am’ is absent only in the state of ‘samadhi’, when the self merges in the Self. Otherwise it will be there. In the state of a realized person the ‘I am’ is there, he just doesn’t give much importance to it. A ‘jnani’ is not guided by a concept.
236.This body is like an instrument that says ‘I am’, like an announcer. Presently you think you are the body-mind, and whatever concepts you have gathered are flowing out. When you begin spirituality, you reject the body-mind with ‘I am not that’. Then you come to the ‘I am’ only, without words. Then you are everything; you are not confined to the body.
237.The riddle of spirituality cannot be solved by the intellect. At the most, your intellect can provide you with livelihood. Whatever you try to become, that is not you. Before the words come out, before you say ‘I am’, that is you. You must be concerned with only yourself. Don’t worry about anybody else. What are you?
238.The capacity of consciousness is something astounding. I didn’t know I was, and then suddenly I knew ‘I am’. This ‘I amness’ is the power of ‘Maya’.
239.What is the most ingrained habit you have? It is to say ‘I am’. This is the root habit. Words and experiences are unworthy of you. This habit of experiencing will not go until you realize that all this is the domain of five elements, and the experiences in the five elements, are unreal. This ‘I amness’ itself is unreal.
240.You must give up the identity with the body. Abidance in that knowledge ‘I am’ which does not identify with the body-mind is the spiritual light. Self-love and ‘I am’ without words are the same. The sickness may come and go, but the self-love does not go.
241.Until you recognize and completely identify yourself with the knowledge ‘I am’, you will identify with the body. When one disidentifies with the body, one transcends not only the body but consciousness as well, since consciousness is a product of the body. The consciousness no longer says ‘I am’, ‘I am’.
242. When you were unaware of this message of ‘I am’ how did you function? The question I put, nobody can answer. All of your great scholars, people with a lot of knowledge, have gone into quietude.
243.That state of being is common to all, that is the message ‘I am’ without words. Change is only in the mind-flow. All the studies you are doing are in the realm of mind-flow. The sense of ‘I am’ is present because of your birth, through which you encounter many thoughts and concepts, always changing. Presently the message ‘I am’ is constant.
244. The body is not you, the name is not you. The body is the food you have consumed; the taste of it is the knowledge ‘I am’. That is Self, the feeling ‘I am’, that is the love to be. How amazing, how incredible, it has no name, but you give many names to it. It is the Self, the love to be. That love to be is all pervading. Before you conceptualize anything, you are, even before the knowingness, you are.
245. You are afraid because you have assumed something as ‘I am’, which actually you are not. Suppose you find a diamond ring on the road and you pocket it. Since it is not yours, a fear overcomes you. When you put on an identity that is not yours, you are afraid. When you are the pure ‘I amness’ only, there is no fear. Presently you are this ‘I am’, but this ‘I am’ is not the truth. Whatever you are prior to the appearance of ‘I am’, that is your real nature.
246. Don’t roam about, don’t come here either. Abide in quietude, peace, stability. Here we are not engaged in any buying or selling. That knowledge ‘I am’, without concepts, is evoked or stimulated by the consciousness and peace which emanate from this place.
247.You did not have the concept ‘I am’ in the course of the nine months in the womb. Understanding this state of affairs, the concept ‘I am’ comes spontaneously and goes spontaneously. Amazingly, when it appears, it is accepted as real. All subsequent misconceptions arise from the feeling of reality in the ‘I amness’. Try to stabilize in the primary concept ‘I am’, in order to lose that and with it all other concepts. Why am I totally free? Because I have understood the unreality of that ‘I am’.
248. If you sit here quietly, being one with the knowledge ‘I am’, then you are not concerned with the world or what goes on in the world. It is only when the consciousness starts operating and there are various movements in the consciousness that the behavior in the world takes place. When I am not conscious of the existence of the body, experiences are not registered.
249.The ‘mumukshu, is in kindergarten, spiritually inclined, but identifying with the body-mind. The ‘sadhaka’ is one who has dis-identified with the body-mind. A ‘siddha’ is one who has stabilized in the knowledge ‘I am’, and in the process, has transcended it. In this journey you very well know where you are.
250.The core of this consciousness is knowingness, to know ‘I am’. It is not a personality, not an individual. It is total manifestation. Beingness is there, it fills everything. Nevertheless, this quality ‘I am’ is the result of the material, objective body. In the seed the whole tree is latent. In the droplet ‘I am’ all three worlds are squeezed in.
251. The highest state is the state of a ‘jnani’. The first step is to be that droplet (‘I am’). In the process of knowing that droplet, you are out of it, and that is a ‘jnani’. A ‘jnani’ is not obsessed by any calamities or any problems, because he has transcended the ‘I am’ principle. He watches the play as a witness.
252. The whole universe is experienced in the consciousness ‘I am’. If that is not there, what else can ever exist? This consciousness is beating a drum; everyone is carried away by the noise of the drum. Who looks for the drummer? Who is sounding and beating the drum? It is so amazing that no one casts even a glance at this speck of consciousness.
253. The habit of considering Self as body has influenced everybody too much. The knowledge ‘I am’ is your Guru. Be in it.
254. The letters ‘I am’ are written spontaneously with a certain ink. What is that ink which was used to write that which you are? In that ink with which the letters ‘I am’ were written, in that ink of the title of ‘Tej Sesh Bhagavan’ is confirmed by the ‘Vedas’. ‘Sesh’ means the leftover, the remains. That ‘Tej Sesh Bhagavan’ has come spontaneously and will spontaneously go. The firm conviction that I am this, the three states – waking state, deep sleep and the knowledge ‘I am’ – are the aspects of that ‘Tej Sesh Bhagavan’. You are not that.
254.Worship the knowledge ‘I am’ as God, as your Guru. Do you see the image of yourself in the mirror first, or do you know you are prior to that? Which is first? If you are not, can you see your image in the mirror? Give up trying to evaluate the real I or the counterfeit I, but associate with the ‘Brahman’, I am the ‘Brahman’.
255.The message ‘I am’ is there. The mind flow is also there; it is not a personality, it is the consciousness. The very idea that you are the body is ridiculous; the consciousness is experiencing its manifestation. A rare being will realize this.
256.The Ultimate you can never be lost; whatever you have lost, you have lost only words. The Ultimate you knows or feels ‘I am’ without words. Through this ‘I am’ comes the world knowledge. You are not in isolation, you are part and parcel of the world knowledge.
257. Presently the feeling that you are is also memory. To sustain that memory of ‘I am’, all these raw materials are necessary. You are not that ‘I am’. You are as the Absolute, prior to this ‘I am’.
258. One cannot see rays of light, as such; they reflect only when they encounter another object. Similarly ‘I amness’ is the interruption because of these five elements and three ‘gunas’. That is why the feeling ‘I am’ is felt; but without the feeling of ‘I am’, still you are.
259. Start with the body. From the body you get the knowledge ‘I am’. In this process you become more and more subtle. When you are in a position to witness the knowledge ‘I am’, you have reached the highest. In this way you must try to understand, and the seeds of knowledge will sprout in you.
260.Now what is it that we are concerned with? We are dealing with the physical form, which is made up of, and fed by, the five elements. In that form are operating the life force (the vital breath) and this consciousness that is, the knowledge ‘I am’ or the sense of being, the sense of existence. The latter is the ‘sentience’, which is the gift of the consciousness.
261. Each of must say ‘I am’ and realize it. There is no ‘you’, and there is no ‘me’, as individual entities. Until the ‘I am’ thought was there, there was no manifestation; both came about simultaneously.
262.This knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, has come out of the prior state when there was no consciousness. The consciousness is a state which is now with us and because of which we suffer; and before this consciousness came, a state prevailed when we were not conscious and which was a happy state.
263. Guru means the ‘I amness’ itself, which always reminds you ‘I am’, ‘I am’, ‘I am’ – that is guru-guru-guru, like the sound of a motorcar starting. It is a continuous reminder that you are.
264.Is it necessary that you should remember that you are (‘I am’)? Spontaneously you know and remember that you are. That is why you have come here, have you not? Because you are. Stay put there.
265. In order to not mistakenly hold on to something as ‘I am’ don’t say I am this, I am that; just hold on to yourself, you are, just be. Just be ‘you are’. Do you follow?
266.You are the knowledge ‘ I am’. So if you want to worship, worship that knowledge ‘I am’. Be devoted to that ‘I amness’ only. When you do that, all other rituals become redundant, useless. Finally when you realize that everything is useless, everything is ‘Brahman’, it means you are at the ‘Parabrahman’ level, the absolute level. When at that level, you will envision everything as useless, including the ‘Brahman’ because the ‘Brahman’ is also reduced to illusion. Therefore all these talks, including my own will be reduced to illusion when you reach the highest.
267.The one who abides in that principle by which he knows ‘I am’, he is the manifest. He abides in that manifest ‘Brahman’ all the twenty-four hours. Whether the body remains or not, that manifest self-principle always remains. You must continually remember, ‘chew the cud’, that the knowledge ‘I am’ signifies knowing all gods, all the ‘Vedas’ it is the ‘Brahman’ only. You must continually think about it. And should in the course of such reminiscing, the body drop off, then that consciousness will definitely be the highest.
268. You are sitting here: ‘you are’. Prior to words. Now the hearsay goes ‘I am’, ‘I am’ means the flow of the mind has started. Now whatever you say with that ‘I amness’ through the mind about ‘you’, you have represented as yourself. But that is not so.
269.The capital we have is the knowledge ‘I am’. But what have we done? We have handed over that knowledge to the body and we say ‘I am the body’. Thereby we have reduced the totality, the limitless, to the limited – a specified insignificant body. And that is why, being unable to give up this association with the body, we are afraid of dying.
270.The vital force carries out all the activities. The mind communicates, and the knowledge ‘I am’ is merely a witness; this is the actual state of affairs. But all these – that is, food body quintessence, and the knowledge ‘I am’, the vital breath and the mind – these are all a temporary phase only; so long as the food essence is available, the knowingness will last.
271.The knowledge ‘I am’ is the product of interaction within the five elemental state, You are not that! You as the Absolute, are not the knowledge ‘I am’.
272.It is very simple. The body and in the body…it is like a coin. On one side, you have the vital breath for making possible all activity; and on the other side is the knowledge ‘I am’. Only when the vital breath is there, the knowledge ‘I am’ is present. When the vital breath leaves the body, the knowledge ‘I am’ also disappears. And both of these are the product of the food essence body. I am not that; this entire composite I am not. This you have to realize.
273.Find out why you are, what is the cause of your being ‘I am’? Actually you had no knowledge that you are or you were. But at this moment, you know you are. Why is that? Understand its cause. You alone know why you are; why is it offered to you that you are, you alone know. Don’t ask anyone else about it, but inquire by yourself. Don’t bother about others, worry only about yourself. That knowledge ‘I am’ is the product of what, is due to what? How and why? Inquire only into this matter.
274. Only that individual who has lost his individuality has merged with the ‘Parabrahman’. So the individuality must go. The entire world moves on the basis of one concept, and that is ‘I am’ – the fundamental concept of one’s individuality.
275. Ultimately all these concepts can and must be understood to be false, but the difficulty and the essential thing is to be convinced that the original basic concept ‘I am’ itself is false.
276.The aim is to awaken yourself to the faith in the self, ‘I am’. That is the entire purpose. So whatever is inducive to that development you may accept. Suppose you have faith in a living guru, then accept a living guru. If you have faith in a guru who has left his body, accept that guru.
277.First of all, this knowingness appeared, the knowingness ‘I am’; later on you embraced the body. Hold on to this only, and don’t ask any questions. You came to know yourself, ‘I am’, to abide in that itself is ‘bhakti’, the devotion.
278. Before you occurred to yourself as ‘I am’; you were in the highest state – the guru of the gurus – the ‘Parabrahman’ state. Later on you started filling up with all kinds of grosser matter and you came down to the body sense – I am the body. So all these impurities have to be removed. Until then, you have to stay put in the quietude.
279. Your fall started with the appearance of that beingness, ‘I am’. With the appearance of this knowingness ‘I am’, the next fall was embracing the body as ‘I am’. And then you gathered so many things onto yourself. Hold on to the state of knowing yourself as ‘I am’ as the truth. All other things you have gathered to yourself are unreal.
280.From the no-knowing state, the first veil I took was that of ‘I am’, That was formless, nameless. But I embraced the body: I got a form for myself; I got a name for myself. This was the fall. Therefore all sages advise: Give up the shackles of the body! ‘I am the body’ – these are the shackles. Give them up.
281. This is no joke, but you can become ‘Parabrahman’ right now. Only it is not a commodity that you can acquire. You, a hundred years ago, were the ‘Parabrahman’. Give me all the information about that state of a hundred years back. Focus your attention only on that consciousness ‘I am’. Don’t be led astray by all the so-called spiritual disciplines and rigmaroles.
282.Who has the knowledge ‘I am’? Somebody in you knows the knowledge ‘I am’, Who is it? It is very obvious that you know you are, but what or who is it that knows you are?
283.It is pure awareness that knows ‘I am’. Who can understand that illusory state? ‘I amness’ is illusory only. It is not a perfect state, it is illusion. Who knows the illusion? A non-illusory state only can know the illusory state. But what is the necessity to say pure awareness? ‘Awareness’ means pure. Since awareness knows ‘I am’, it is other; it is more than ‘I am’. That is the highest; there are no gradations in awareness. In the Absolute, the ‘Parabrahman’ state, there is no question of impure or pure awareness.
284.You are not the personality or the individual. The quintessence of this food, which in turn is the outcome of the five-elemental play, is the taste ‘I am’. ‘I am’ is not a personality or an individual. I am addressing that principle, that touch of ‘I am’, that consciousness which is the product of the food essence body.
285.How can you speak or develop any concept unless the primary concept ‘I am’ is available? This primary concept begets further concepts, that is all other concepts occur to it. However, whatever concept occurs to you, including the primary concept ‘I am’, is not the eternal state.
286.This primary concept, ‘I amness’ is dishonest, because it is still a concept only. Finally one has to transcend that also and be in the ‘nirvikalpa’ state, which means the concept-free state. Then you have no concept at all, not even of ‘I am’. In that state one does not know that one is. This state is known as ‘Parabrahman’: ‘Brahman’ transcended. ‘Brahman’ is manifest; ‘Parabrahman’ is beyond that, prior to that; the Absolute. Do you understand what I am driving at? Whatever you caught in your attention, that attention should eventually turn into no-attention. The state that is finally left over is Awareness, ‘Parabrahman’.
287.With the arrival of the consciousness, it occurs to you that you are; simultaneously, ‘I am’ occurs to you or in your attention. So when the consciousness is not there, attention is also not there. Subsequent to the arrival of consciousness and attention, everything else crept in. The Absolute state is prior to consciousness; it means the unborn state. Since the ‘Parabrahman’ is the unborn state, prior to consciousness, can it have an iota of knowledge?
288.How can you retain the pride that I am like this? This ‘I am’ business depends entirely on the food essence. So how can you retain it perpetually – that I shall remain like this only? To extract any essence, water is very necessary, and the water quality is bound to dry up.
289.The knowledge ‘I am’ is a primary concept, and is also non-eternal. The One, the Absolute, which is eternal and aware, why should he worry about anybody else?
290.Once you reject what you are not, whatever finally remains, the leftover, is yourself – your true nature. Presently, whatever you know is ‘I am’, this ‘I am’ is the product of the five elements. Out of the elements comes the food body and because of the food body, that ‘I amness’ is sustained. And you are also not that ‘I am’. ‘I am’ is the taste, the fragrance of this food body. The ultimate ‘you’ has no fragrance, no taste, no touch of ‘I amness’.
291.The scriptures say that we have our ‘karma’ and our sin and that is why we are here, but this is for the ignorant masses. One who has realized the self-knowledge ‘I am’ for him these stories are of no use.
292.The primary illusion is only this knowingness ‘I am’, prior to that there was no illusion. This very consciousness is the source of illusion. This illusion or consciousness or ‘I amness’ does not remain as something eternal. It is liberated; this non-eternal consciousness is liberated, when the knowingness is transformed into non-knowingness, that is liberation.
293.To produce the source of the mind, ‘I am’, you must have the ingredient of the five-elemental juice. If that is available, the sprouting of the mind can begin with ‘I am’. You know you are before even speaking the words ‘I am’. Subsequent to the knowingness ‘I am’, you say ‘I am’ by words.
294.Are you not even before you have spoken the words ‘I am’? Stay put there only. There begins your spirituality, the foremost ‘you’, ‘I am’ without words, before the beginning of words. Be there; out of that grows the experience ‘I am’.Witnessing happens to that principle which prior to your saying the words ‘I am’. There is no such thing as deliberate witnessing. Witnessing just happens, by itself.
295.You must analyze ‘death’, the meaning of this common parlance. At the time that death occurs, the vital breath quits the body, gradually leaves the body. At the same time as the vital breath, the mind and the language also go out. Simultaneously, this quality of ‘I am’, this ‘sattva-guna’, the quality of beingness, also departs or goes into oblivion. Only I, the Absolute, remains. Stay put there only, nothing happens to I, the Absolute.
296.Here is an article before it came into existence, what was its name? From non-being into the being state, how was it observed? You just felt that touch. Before observing anything we feel the touch of ‘I am’. To realize that state prior to conception, that eternal state, whatever that state is, to abide in that is the highest. Now, for your sake, I attach a name to it, the ‘Parabrahman’ state – the Absolute.
297.A ‘jnani’ knows that he has realized when he recognizes his knowingness, which is the sense of ‘I am’. Right here and now you are in the realized state. But you try to judge it through desires and mind-concepts, hence your inability to apperceive it and abide in it. In the ‘jnani’ state, there is no need for anything, not even to know oneself. You are attached to the body-senses, therefore even though you may attain an age of hundred years, you still would crave for more years.
298. On the state of ‘non-beingness’, the beingness appeared together with manifestation, creating a feeling as if ‘I am’; who that is, is not important, only ‘I am’ is important. The initial humming of the beingness as ‘I am, I am’ is the duality. But who accepts the duality? The ‘non-beingness’ accepts duality with the beingness. The Absolute ‘non-being’ state, by assuming the being state, becomes dual in manifestation.
299. First you have what is called ‘atma-bhava’ – that is the ‘I am’ sense. Later, this sense identifies with the form of a body, when it is called ‘aham-akar’, the ‘I am’ form, this is ego. Ego is never a title or name, but just a sense of ‘I am’ prior to words. The waking state, the sleep state and the knowingness ‘I am’ constitute an ego. In the absence of these three states what do you think you are? What would be the evidence of your existence?
300. The knowledge ‘I am’ is nothing. That knowledge is like a guest; it comes and goes. You have come here; you are very clever. Now what did happen? All the knowledge, which you had collected elsewhere and brought here, is rendered useless and redundant. So long as beingness is there, all worldly activities will go on. But you now realize that ‘You’ are neither the activities in the beingness nor the beingness. ‘You’ as the Absolute, are none of these.
301.With the transcendence of the knowledge ‘I am’, the Absolute prevails. The state is called ‘Parabrahman’, while the knowledge ‘I am’ is termed Brahman. This knowledge ‘I am’ or the beingness is illusion only. Therefore, when Brahman is transcended, only the ‘Parabrahman’ is, in which there is not even a trace of the knowledge ‘I am’.
302. First there was no message ‘I am’ and also there was no world. Instantly, the message ‘I am’ and this magnificent world materialized out of ‘nothingness’! How amazing! This message ‘I am’ is nothing other that the advertisement of the Eternal Truth.
303.How was I in the absence of the message ‘I am’ – that is, prior to beingness? I provided you with the name tags for that state. These titles are ‘Parabrahman’, ‘Paramatman’ etc.; they are only pointers to the state, but not the state itself. In the Ultimate they are redundant, extraneous and bogus.
304. The primary miracle is that I experience ‘I am’ and the world. Prior to this experiencing, I abided in myself, in my eternal Absolute state. Without my beingness – that is, without the message ‘I am’ – my eternal Absolute state only prevails.
305.The eternal Absolute state of mine prior to the beingness, when the message ‘I am’ was not, is supremely significant. Who would have witnessed the message ‘I am’, if my priormost state of the ‘non-beingness’ was not?
306. If one obtains and relishes the nectar of the Lord’s feet, the ‘charan-amrita’, the mind can be conquered. This is called ‘manojaya’ – victory over the mind. However, only a true devotee, a ‘bhakta’, a god, can obtain the ‘charan-amrita’. But what is its relationship with all beings? It dwells in the core of all beings as the knowledge ‘I am’, the love ‘to be’, the ‘charan-amrita’.
307.But how can such a state be attained? Only if one totally accepts the knowledge ‘I am’ as oneself with full conviction and faith and firmly believes in the dictum ‘I am that by which I know I am’. This knowledge ‘I am’ is the ‘charan-amrita’. Why is it called ‘amrita’ – the nectar? Because it is said, by drinking nectar one becomes immortal. Thus a true devotee, by abiding in the knowledge ‘I am’ transcends the experience of death and attains immortality.
308. Once you subside into the consciousness, the factual state of Reality shall be revealed to you with the knowledge that will emanate out of you intuitively, like spring water. This will enable you to discern not what is real and unreal, but, most importantly, to realize what ‘I am’. And who could be that one? Surely not an individual who is trapped in the mind-shell, but that one is the knowledge ‘I am’ – the consciousness.
309.Consciousness is the sense of knowingness ‘I am’ without words, and it appeared unknowingly and unsolicited. Only in the realm of knowingness ‘I am’ – the consciousness – can a world be, and so also an experience. Hold on to this knowingness ‘I am’ and the fount of knowledge will well up within you, revealing the mystery of the Universe; of your body and psyche; of the play of the five elements, the three ‘gunas’ and ‘prakriti-purusha’; and of everything else. In the process of this revelation, your individualistic personality confined to the body shall expand into the manifested universe, and it will be realized that you permeate and embrace the entire cosmos as your ‘body’ only. This is known as the ‘Pure Superknowledge’ – ‘Shuddhavijnana’.
310.Now coming to a very subtle situation, what is it in you that understands this knowledge ‘you are’ – or from your standpoint ‘I am’ without a name, title or word? Subside in that innermost center and witness the knowledge ‘I am’ and ‘just be’; this is the bliss of being – the ‘swarupananda’.
311.Paths and movements cannot transport you into Reality, because their function is to enmesh you within the dimensions of knowledge, while the Reality prevails prior to it. To apprehend this, you must stay put at the source of your creation, at the beginning of the knowledge ‘I am’. So long as you do not achieve this, you will be entangled in the chains forged by your mind and get enmeshed in those of others.
312. This true knowledge, the knowledge ‘I am’, is also rendered the status of ‘non-knowledge’ in the final Absolute state. When one is established in this final free state, the knowledge ‘I am’ becomes ‘non-knowledge’.
313. For all beings it is the same experience. Early morning, immediately after waking, just the feeling ‘I am’ is felt inside or the beingness happens, and therefore further witnessing of all else happens. The first witnessing is that of ‘I am’, this primary witnessing is the prerequisite for all further witnessing. But to whom is the witnessing occurring? One that ever is, even without waking, to that ever-present substratum the witnessing of the waking state happens.
314. At present, ‘I am’ is in the beingness state. But when I do not have the knowingness of the ‘I am’ illusion, then the ‘Poornabrahman’ or ‘Parabrahman’ state prevails. In the absence of the touch of ‘I amness’ I am the total complete, ‘Poornabrahman’ state, the permanent state. The borderline of beingness and non-beingness is intellect-boggling, because the intellect subsides at that precise location. This borderline is the ‘maha-yoga’. You must be at that borderline, that ‘maha-yoga’ state’. You descend into the ‘godown’ of that state which has the title ‘birth’.
315. The sense that ‘you are’ is a big thing. What is most significant is the fact that you remember your sense of being, subsequently all other things appear. Earlier this memory ‘I am’ was not and suddenly it appeared. Now I expound on the spiritual talk called ‘niroopana’. In Marathi the word ‘niroopana’ is derived from the word ‘niroopa’ (nirope), which means ‘message’. Therefore, to deliver any spiritual talk that is ‘niroopana’, the primary message ‘I am’ must first be present, then whatever ensues from this primary message will be the spiritual talk.
316. This little container of food essence is being sucked by that beingness, ‘I am’ day and night. The principle that sucks that container is not the body; it is apart from the body. This beingness principle dwells in that food body itself. Just as the child sucks on the mother’s breast, the beingness consumes the body.
317. Just as the salty taste is present in the entire ocean, the beingness or the sense of ‘I am’ in the human form has the inherent capacity to be all-pervading, but having conditioned – and thereby limited – itself to the body form, it interested only in protecting and preserving the body.
318. How does one recognize this ‘atman’? It is by understanding the knowledge ‘I am’ – the ‘atma-jnana’. Just as space is all-pervading, so the knowledge ‘I am’ is all-pervading, limitless and infinite. How strange, such a supreme principle is treated as though it is a body! All the sufferings are due to this mistaken identity. If you give the highest honor due to it, you will not undergo either suffering or death.
319. To abide in the knowledge ‘I am’ is one’s true religion – the ‘svadharma’. But instead of following it, you opted to be irreligious by submitting to the dictates of your concepts, which led you to believe that you are a body. This misconception ensured only the fear of death.
320. The fragrance or sweetness of the food-essence body is the knowledge ‘I am’. It has no name and form; it is the ‘I love’ state, the ‘I-taste’. But from your body-mind state, you will go to pilgrimages and various gurus. So long as the consciousness is there, that humming goes on, and who does the humming? The principle which is humming and saying, ‘I am, I am’ is itself your guru.
321. ‘Jnana-yoga’ means to inquire how this ‘I amness’ and the world came about. To realize that ‘I amness’ and the world are the same is ‘jnana-yoga’. Here the knowledge ‘I am’ should subside in itself.
322. The primary occurrence is the reminder ‘I am’ and out of which springs the language and the talk. So, what is this ‘I amness’? Remember that it is in the primary reminder ‘I am’ that the whole cosmos and your body exist. Who and from where is this sense of being? This has to be thoroughly investigated. When this is done, while abiding necessarily in the knowledge ‘I am’ – the sense of beingness – an amazing revelation will be made, namely that from your own seed-beingness the whole manifest universe is projected including your body. This supreme and powerful principle, though being itself without form and name, upon sensing ‘I am’ instantly embraces the body and mistakenly accepts this as its own. It clings to the body-identity so quickly that the fact of its own independent existence is easily missed.
323. You are quite knowledgeable; now understand this; if you think you are dying, it shows that you still identify with your body and that your knowledge ‘I am’ has not merged in itself, which also indicates that you have not attained ‘jnana-yoga’. Your spiritual knowledge therefore smacks of impurity. While you are actually the manifest knowledge ‘I am’, you cling to a body as yourself; this is the impurity.’
324. Suppose a question is asked of you, what were you a hundred years back? You would reply ‘I was not’. That means, I was not like ‘this’, that is not like this present ‘I am’. Who (and how) could (he) say ‘I was not like this’? The one who says this, was he not there? The one who was prior to a hundred years was not like this present ‘I am’, but he was and is now.
325. Do nothing, absolutely nothing! Just be, be the knowledge ‘I am’ only and abide there. To imbibe this meditate on beingness only. Catch hold of the knowledge ‘I am’ in meditation. In this process, the realization occurs that ‘I’ the Absolute am not the ‘guna’ ‘I am’; therefore in meditation nothing is to be retained in memory. Nevertheless something will appear on the memory screen, but be unconcerned, just be, do nothing. Refrain from grasping anything in meditation; the moment you do, otherness begins, and so does duality. Nothing is to be done. Then all your riddles will be solved and dissolved. ‘Moolmaya’ – that is, the primary illusion – will release her stranglehold on you and will get lost.
326. At first ‘no one’ is. Instantly, one is, and then two. The subject of the talk is: How did these two reduce to one, and finally to nothing? Out of nothingness spontaneously the sense of beingness is felt - this is one. Later, when the sense of beingness knows ‘I am’ duality begins. Then after the duality has arisen, the sense of being identifies with the form, and so on. Actually to refer to the sense of being as ‘one’, is not quite correct. Since in this state only the sense of being prevails, where is the need to say even ‘one’? With the appearance of otherness (duality), both no.1 and no.2 appear simultaneously. To say ‘something is’, ‘I’ must be there first. If ‘I’ am not, I cannot say ‘something is’. So the fundamental principle of spirituality is that ‘I must be there, before anything else can be. This ‘I’ is the beingness which if first.
327.When you sit in deep meditation, your sense of being is totally infused with the knowledge ‘I am’ only. In such a state it will be revealed to you intuitively as to how and why your sense of ‘I amness’ emerged. Consciousness, beingness, sense of being, ‘I amness’, all are the same in you, prior to emanation of any words.
328. This is a subtle point, so try to understand it clearly. When I say ‘I was not’ prior to conception, then what I actually mean is that I was not like this present ‘I am’. But that ‘I’ which could discern this must be there to judge the absence of the present ‘I am’.
329. Shall we call the knowledge ‘I am’ the guru? But even that knowledge you are not! Knowledge ‘I am’ means consciousness, God, ‘Ishwara’, guru etc. but you the Absolute are not that.
330. This is to be understood and realized, that ‘I am’ is even before the arising of any words and questions in me. People always want a name or concept to indicate the state of ‘I am’ prior to words. When this is done by giving it a name, like for example Brahman, they feel satisfied.
331.Beingness can act in the world only with the aid of the body. This body is the quintessence of the five elements, and the quintessence of the body-essence is the knowledge ‘I am’. The presiding principle of the whole functioning is the knowledge ‘I am’. This knowledge ‘I am’ has to be correctly understood.
332. A body maybe dark, fair, tall or short, but the indwelling principle – which is the knowledge ‘I am’ – has no color or dimension, just like the vital breath and mind. It is merely a ‘sense of presence’ a feeling of effulgence. And mind functions like its vehicle or medium for executing worldly activities.
333. You should understand this clearly. If one thinks one is the body, one becomes a slave of mind and suffers accordingly. Therefore, you should completely identify yourself with the highest principle in you, which is the knowledge ‘I am’. This will elevate you to the status of ‘brihaspati’ – the guru of gods.
334.When the meditator forgets himself totally in meditation, it is ‘vishranti’ which means complete relaxation ending total forgetfulness. This is the blissful state, where there is no need for words, concepts or even the sense of ‘I am’. The state does not know ‘it is’ and is beyond happiness and suffering and altogether beyond words; it is called the ‘Parabrahman’ – a non-experiential state.
335. Before the emanation of any words, ‘I’ already exist; later I say mentally ‘I am’. The word-free and thought-free state is the ‘atman’.
336. The knowingness ‘I am’ is gradually felt by the child and this is followed by the mind. This ‘I amness’ feeling before the formation of the mind is the ignorant-child-principle, termed the ‘balkrishna’ state. This ‘balkrishna’ principle has great potential. Here ‘bal’ means the food essence, child-body, and ‘krishna’ means ‘non-knowing’, that is, ignorance. But it has the potential to receive, respond and react. I am not in this state, the child principle, ‘balkrishna’, as I abide in the Absolute.
337. At present you identify yourself with your body and mind. Therefore, in the initial stages of your spiritual practice, you should reject the identity by imbibing the principle that ‘I am’ is the vital breath and the consciousness only and not the body and mind. In the later stages, the vital breath and the consciousness – that is the knowledge ‘I am’ – merge in one’s ultimate nature.
338. That ultimate state is known as ‘vishranti’, which means total rest, complete relaxation, utter quietude etc. The other meaning, by splitting the word, would be, ‘vishara (visra)-anti’ – forget yourself in the end. That means in the ultimate state, ‘you-areness’ is totally forgotten. Whether ‘I am’ or ‘I am not’ both are forgotten. This is the highest type of rest – ‘parama-vishranti’.
339. When I pleased my ‘I amness’ by understanding it, only then did I come to know this ‘I amness’ and in the process also discovered that ‘I’ the Absolute, am not that ‘I am’. Stay put at one place. Having collected all the knowledge, ponder over it in seclusion.
340. You abide in that knowledge ‘I am’. You should understand that your destination is your own self, the ‘I am’. It is the very source of everything; That ‘I am’ is to be realized. Because ‘you are’, the consciousness is. Before you say ‘I am’ you already are. ‘I am’ – the word or the ‘I am’ feeling that you get inside you – is not eternal. But you are eternal and ancient.
341. You have to stabilize in your present true nature, ‘I am’. All other secondary and redundant objects should be got rid of. Do not focus you attention on any of these things. The whole process is to be in your source. At present, what is your source? ‘I am’. Catch hold of that ‘I amness’ and be in it. You have to realize your own self. You must be at the borderline between ‘I am’ and ‘Not-‘I am’’.
342. When that witness itself, which is ‘I am’, subsides, what remains? With the witness gone, all other things have disappeared too. By the same token, upon the arising of the ‘ I am’, the whole manifestation takes place; these two are not separate, they are one, ‘I am’ is the witness, the entire manifest world is because of this.
343.When ‘I am’ arises, everything appears; when ‘I am’ subsides everything subsides. Now this what I am trying to tell you, but you want something else. You want something about your future, something which is part of manifestation, but I am trying to hit at it.
344. This ‘I am’ is an announcement, it is not the real, it has come out of something else. What the real is, I am not trying to tell you, because words negate that. Whatever I am telling you, is not the truth, because it has come out of the ‘I am’.
345. While I am talking about it (‘I am’) I take you to the source of the spring. There, water is coming out in a trickle now. This trickle subsequently becomes a river, an estuary, and finally the sea, I take you to the source again and again. Once you arrive at the source, you come to know that actually there is no water, the water is purely the taste, the news that ‘I am’.
346. There is no explanation for how this seed, this consciousness or knowledge ‘I am’ has arisen. But once it is in existence, it cannot stand still – that is, consciousness is tantamount to ‘movement’. And all movement takes place through the ‘gunas’, which are inherent in the knowledge ‘I am’. This consciousness keeps on ‘humming’ – (Maharaj uses the Marathi word ‘gun-gun’) – and expresses itself through the three ‘gunas’.
347. This ‘gun-gun’ is within the knowledge ‘I am’, which includes the physical form. The ‘gun-gun’ entity and the knowledge ‘I am’ and the physical form – that whole bundle – has been created out of the five elements. So up to this point, the whole thing can be said to be entirely mechanistic and therefore pure ignorance.
348. How did I get this birth? That is the point on which I persist in finding the answer; I ‘must’ know this. When I was told ‘sattva’, then what is ‘sattva’? ‘Sattva’ is the essence of the five elements. In that essence, in that juice, lies the knowledge ‘I am’; but all that is still of the five elements. Then how did this come about? My guru told me the whole story. Thus I came to know it is ignorance, and I know from experience, that everybody is starting from there. Thus whatever has come about is sheer ignorance, and we are nothing more, that is what my guru told me.
349. My guru further pointed out to me the fact that the only thing you have and which you can utilize to unravel the mystery of life, is this knowledge ‘I am’. Without that there is absolutely nothing, so I got hold of it, as my guru advised me, and then I wanted to find out how the spiritual aspect of ‘me’ came about without my knowledge. On my pure Absoluteness, which has no place, and no shape or form, this knowledge ‘I am’ came, which also has no shape or form. Therefore, it appears; and it is only an illusion.
350.This beingness, the knowledge ‘I am’, which I call ‘upadro’, is the source of trouble. In this ‘upadro’, in this primary essence, lies the knowledge ‘I am’ – you know that you are. This quality of beingness (‘sattvaguna’), the knowledge ‘I am’ cannot tolerate itself. It cannot stand itself, alone, just knowing itself. Therefore that ‘rajoguna’ is there… it takes the beingness for a ride in various activities, so that it does not dwell on itself; it is very difficult to sustain that state. And ‘tamoguna’ is the basest quality, it claims authorship or doership for all those activities conducted through ‘rajoguna’. This is the play happening in these three gunas (qualities). Again understand, you are experiencing this ‘sattvaguna’, the knowledge ‘I am. This ‘I amness’ is experienced by you, the Absolute, but you are not the ‘I amness’.
351. ‘Sadhana’, the discipline, is only this: The knowledge which is dwelling in this body, the quintessence of these three ‘gunas’ – the knowledge ‘I am’, ‘I am that’ – this is the initial step. You must be one with it; you must abide in that only. You have to think ‘ I am not the body but I am that formless, nameless knowledge indwelling in this body’; that (is) ‘I am’. When you abide sufficiently long in this state, whatever doubts you may have, that knowledge ‘I am’ itself will sprout out with life and meaning for you, intended for you only, and everything will become clear. No external knowledge will be necessary.
352. Conviction! That is the only technique for the ‘sadhana’ if you are thinking of any initiation…only the words of the guru that you are not the body! That is the initiation. Stay put there, in that state. It is spontaneous, natural, that ‘shraddha’ (faith). What is that faith? ‘I am’ without words, whatever you are that is the faith. Now you have to elevate yourself to the state of ‘Brahman’; this is the condition you have to develop.
353. What exactly is born? What is born are three states: the waking state, the sleep state, and the knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness. The body and the vital breath would not be able to function if this consciousness were not present. These three states work through the three attributes (‘gunas’). I very clearly see that which has been born. And I also know that I am not that which is born. And that is why I am totally fearless. So this knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, this feeling or sense of being, is the quintessence of the body. And if that body essence is gone, this feeling, the sense of being, will also have gone.
354. Once the body and the sense of being(‘I am’) goes what remains is the Original, which is unconditioned, without attributes, and without identity; that on which this temporary state of the consciousness and the three states and the three ‘gunas’ have come and gone. It is called ‘Parabrahman’, the Absolute.
355. In that ‘Parabrahman’, which unconditioned,, without attributes, without identity – the identity comes only when there is the knowledge ‘I am’ – so if that itself is not there, who is there to ask? This is to understood not by ‘someone’ (with a body-mind identity), but it must be experienced, and in such a manner that the experiencer and experience are one.
356. When the truth came out, it was found that in a certain atom the entire Universe is contained. And what is that atom? It is the beingness, the knowledge ‘I am’. That contains the whole Universe.
357. The atomic consciousness contains the whole Universe, but yet he (the ‘jnani’) knows that he is not that consciousness. So in that case what pride can he have? He is the Absolute state, in which the ‘I am’ consciousness is absent. If you meet any ‘jnanis, you will find it easy to recognize them, for they will not have any pride in their Self-knowledge, since they have transcended that knowledge also. They say ‘I am not this knowledge or this consciousness’.
358. My statement, and that of my guru, is that childhood is a cheat, it is false. The knowledge ‘I am’ itself is a cheat. When the beingness appears, that love for existence is a result of the primary illusion, that ‘maya’. Once you come to know that you exist, you feel like enduring eternally, you always want to be, to exist, to survive. And so the struggle begins, all because of ‘maya’.
359. This knowledge ‘I am’ has dawned on you, since then whatever other knowledge you have acquired, whatever experiences you have had, whatever you have seen of the world has all been witnessed. But that one to whom the witnessing takes place is entirely separate from that which is witnessed.
360. You base yourself on the body that you are now, and don’t understand its root. That is why we think we are this body, and for that you must do meditation. What is meditation? Meditation is not this body-mind meditating as an individual, but it is this knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, meditating on itself. Then the consciousness will unfold its own meaning.
361.This itself is the greatest miracle, that I got the news ‘I am’, have you any doubts that you are? It is self-evident. Prior to knowing that you are, what knowledge did you have? ‘Dhyana’ means to have an objective. You want to consider something. You ‘are’ that something, just to be, you are. Just being the being ‘I am’. You meditate on something; that knowledge ‘I am’ is yourself. Abide only there. How can you ask any questions at this point? Because that is the beginning of knowledge.
362. By reading various books and listening to everything else, you cannot become a ‘mahatma’, but only through that knowledge ‘I am’. Don’t concentrate on the body; because of a body you call yourself male or female. Just hold on to that knowledge ‘I am’ only without body sense – beyond name and form or design. But you have to employ name, form and design for the sake of worldly activities.
363. You must have a firm conviction that ‘I am’ is only that ‘I am’ without body-mind form – the knowledge ‘I am’ purely. You say all these things, but has the knowledge come within the purview of the knowledge? You must have that full conviction, whatever you may have said, that is the truth and that is ‘I am’. There are no techniques, except the technique that ‘I am’ the firm conviction that ‘I am’ means ‘I am’ only, abidance in ‘I’. Don’t practice this thing, only develop your conviction.
364.This conviction can be strengthened by meditation, like ‘dhyana’. And ‘dhyana’ means the knowledge must remain in meditation with the knowledge. Now, what is meditation? Meditation is the knowledge ‘I am’ remaining in that knowledge. There is the waking state and the sleep state, and the knowledge that you are, I exist, I know that I exist. Other than that what capital does anyone have than merely knowledge ‘I am’? ‘Dhyana’ is when this knowledge, this consciousness that I am, meditates on itself and not on something other than itself.
365.When you say you sit for meditation, the first thing to be done is understand that it is not this body identification that is sitting for meditation, but this knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, which is sitting in meditation and is meditating on itself. When this is finally understood, then it becomes easy. When this consciousness, this conscious presence, merges in itself, the state of ‘samadhi’ ensues. It is the conceptual feeling that I exist that disappears and merges into the beingness itself. So this conscious presence also gets merged into that knowledge, that beingness – that is ‘samadhi’.
366. There is that nine-month period in the womb. So what is the content of the womb? It is that knowledge ‘I am’ in dormant condition. This is being developed slowly, so within the birth principle everything is contained. That which is called birth, the birth principle is ‘turiya’; the experience that you exist itself is ‘turiya’. ‘Turiya’ means where the consciousness is. One who knows ‘turiya’ is ‘turiyatita’. That is my state. ‘Turiya’ is within the consciousness, which is the product of the five elements. And one who transcends that, who knows the ‘turiya’, is ‘turiyatita’. In order to stabilize in ‘turiya’, you must know the birth principle. ‘Turiya’ is always described as the witness state that see through waking, dreaming and sleeping. And ‘turiyatita’ is even beyond that.
367.This ‘I am’ concept was not there prior to what you call ‘birth’. So as this concept has appeared, it will also go away. How am I affected? In no way whatsoever, because it is not true. This applies to all concepts. Prior to birth and after birth, whatever knowledge I have, my own, without hearing it from any one, that is the only true knowledge I accept. And the proof lies in my guru’s words.
368. The body dies. This means what? It means only the thought ‘I am’, that concept, has disappeared. Nothing has happened to the knower of the whole happening. So long as the basic concept ‘I am’ is there, the conceptual element cannot disappear. It is the concept itself that has given various names to itself, but it is still the same concept. Before this concept of ‘I am’ came on you, were you happy or unhappy? Was there even any feeling of happiness or unhappiness? Any of the dualities? In the absence of the basic concept ‘I am’, there is no thought, no awareness, and no consciousness of one’s existence.
369.Originally, I am untainted – uncovered by anything, without stigma – since nobody existed prior to me. Nor do I entertain any concepts about somebody existing, before me. Everything is in the form of the manifested world, after the appearance of the knowledge ‘I am’ with the body. Together with the body and the indwelling ‘ I amness’ everything is. Prior to the appearance of this body and the knowledge ‘I am’, what was there?
370. The feeling ‘I am’ is the quintessence of everything, but I the Absolute am not that. That ‘I amness’ is the highest knowledge. And this is surrendered here by the abidance in the action.
371. So long as the concept ‘I am’ is still there, they (people who contact maharaj) have not gone beyond or prior to it; they have not gone beyond the total manifestation. So now when people come here, I talk with them, from what level am I talking? I am talking from the level that you are consciousness and not the body-mind. In my state whatever comes out is from the total manifestation, not from the point of view of the Absolute. Hang on to that consciousness, which is your only capital, and do ‘dhyana’ and let that unfold whatever knowledge has to be unfolded.
372. At present you wrongly identify yourself as the body. Body is given a certain name; that is ‘you’; you consider it to be like that. But I say that in this body, consciousness is present, or the knowledge ‘I am’ as I call it, is there. You should identify yourself as this knowledge. That is all.
373. For meditation you should sit with identification with the knowledge ‘I am’ only and have confirmed to yourself that you are not the body. You must dwell only in that knowledge ‘I am’ – not merely the words ‘I am’. And the indwelling knowledge that you are, without words, that itself you are. In that identity you must stabilize yourself. And then whatever doubts you have will be cleared by that very knowledge, and everything will be opened up to you.
374. Forget all about physical disciplines in this connection. I am telling you that the indwelling principle ‘I am’, the knowledge that you are, you have to ‘be’ that. Just be that, with that knowledge ‘ I am’, hold on to the knowledge ‘I am’.
375. You know you are sitting here; you know you are, do you require any special effort to hold on to that ‘you are’? You know you are; abide only in that. The ‘I am’ principle without words, that itself is the God of all ‘Ishwaras’.
376. If you identify yourself as the body, such an identity must be let go of, sacrificed. Your real identity has no body and no thought. And that self, the spontaneous knowledge ‘ I am’ you are. Since the self is not the body, the self is neither male nor female. You must fulfill the vow that you are not the body but solely the indwelling principle ‘I am’.
377. With firm conviction, you abide in this knowledge ‘I am’ only; bereft of body-mind sense, only ‘I am’. If you dwell therein, if you be that only, in due course it will get mature. And it will reveal to you all the knowledge. And you need not go to anybody else.
378.The concept ‘I am’ is the primordial ‘maya’. And that ‘maya’, that primordial concept ‘I am’ requires support and therefore God and ‘Ishwara’ have been born. Along with that the whole manifestation, the entire Universe, has come upon it. Otherwise, there is absolutely nothing. And out of many ‘jnanis’, there will only be a rare one who knows the real nature of this primary concept.
379. First, the knowingness knows itself, knowing that ‘I am’. And in the illumination by that ‘I amness’, or that consciousness, everything else observed. I have had to repeat the same thing again and again, and I do not want to run kindergarten classes of spirituality.
380. All this is the play of concepts. The primary concept ‘I am’ appears spontaneously. It likes ‘I am’; it loves that ‘I am’ state. Devouring ever more concepts, it gets totally enmeshed in them. And what is the source of all concepts? This primary feeling ‘I am’. But never forget the fact that it itself is a concept, time-bound. And so it is all mental entertainment.
381. What equipment you are having is that ‘prana’. ‘Upasana’ means worship, worship of ‘prana’ itself. For doing that what equipment do you possess? It is ‘prana’ itself. Along with ‘prana’ there is that knowledge ‘I am’, or consciousness. These two things are available to you to do anything, nothing more than that.
382. In the absence of beingness, when you did not know about your existence? Nothing was of any value to you. This memory ‘I am’ is neither true nor false; it is without these two attributes. That memory of beingness only appears to exist.
383. For eternal peace you must dwell in yourself, know how this touch of ‘I am’ has appeared. All other knowledge is of no use in this connection.
384.Where there is the vital breath, the knowledge ‘I am’ is present. There being no vital breath, the knowledge of ‘I amness’ is absent. Take full advantage of the naturally available capital with you – that is, your life force and the knowledge ‘I am’; they always go hand in hand. Right now, exploit it to the utmost. All worldly activities are going on only because of the knowledge ‘I am’ together with that motive force which is the life force, the vital breath. And that is not something apart from you; you are that only. Investigate and study this exclusively, abide in that, worship that only.
385. What is this state before this knowledge ‘I am’ came upon me? When the knowledge ‘ I am’ came, the one who is satisfied with that will reach the state where he considers himself God and ‘Brahman’. But he does not go beyond it or prior to it. In the ultimate state lies the prior state; that is, the state before this knowledge ‘I am’ ever dawned on me – the highest state, the best state, the original state.
386. I call a ‘siddha’ one who has attained the ultimate, in that ultimate state, the devotee and God, the ‘maya’ (primary illusion) and the ‘Brahman’ have disappeared. And, there is no beneficiary or experiencer of all that, because he is without the concept ‘I am’. He does not know ‘I am’, he does not know that he exists in that state, that knowingness is completely obliterated.
387. This primary concept is the knowledge ‘I am’, it is the mother of all other concepts. In order to get that satisfaction, you must find the source of this primary concept ‘I am’. You should give attention to the knowledge ‘I am’ and meditate on that itself. Knowledge is to be got hold of knowledge only. This will produce the seed, which, through this process of meditation, slowly grows into a big tree, and that itself will give you all the knowledge. It will not be necessary for you to ask anyone what is what.
388. These two entities are available to you, the vital force and the knowledge ‘I am’, the consciousness. They appear without any effort; they are there. Now, in order to be one with ‘Ishwara’, to understand the non-duality you must worship the vital force. Then that knowledge, which is in seed form, slowly grows. And the seeker becomes full of knowledge; in the process he transcends that, and the ultimate state is achieved.
389. ‘I am’ itself is the world; it contains the entire world, that should be your conviction. Just as in a dream, when you feel that you are awake, but actually you are not and your world at that time is the dream world. Similarly this knowingness (in the waking state) contains this so-called real world; that conviction must come. The truth is that there is no difference between (dream) consciousness and (waking) consciousness, although they appear to be greatly different; all consciousness is one.
390. The conviction that this world never existed can happen only to ‘Parabrahman’. If this is indeed your conviction then you are the ‘Parabrahman’. This thing aside, you should discover how this news ‘I am’ – the knowledge of your existence – appeared and at what moment. Go to the source of it and find out.
391. The words of ‘prana’ signify mind. So how could there be mind without vital force? This vital force and the consciousness (that is, the knowledge ‘I am’ or the beingness and the mind) appear simultaneously and always exist together.
392. Before descending into this ‘avatar’, this knowledge quality was not present; knowingness was not there. The ‘I am’ was absent, not available. It is a non-knowing state, but afterwards, the state comprises all conceptual titles and names, and they are a person’s shackles. Any person, any embodied person with that knowledge ‘I am’ carries on his activities in the world with shackles of name only.
393. Once it is understood that ‘I am’ is purely ‘I am’, formless and not that shackled body form – then no liberation is called for. To be stabilized in that beingness, which has no name and form, that itself is liberation.
394. Understanding what that ‘avatar’ is, Lord Krishna avatar, means in essence abiding in that only. Then one is not the body. And what is the body? It is a mere aid for the sustenance or endurance of that ‘I am’ principle.
395. The vital breath gets conditioned or manacled by the bondage of name. It accepts the name as ‘ I am’; this is the mistake. That which is deconditioned from name and form is ‘Paramatman’. That which conditioned by the body, mind, name and form is called ‘jiva’. The language of the vital breath is mind, and the mind is the motive force for all activities.
396. If you are able to establish yourself in the vital breath as you are, you become manifest. The vital breath, when it is conditioned by the body, you call it personality. But as a matter the vital breath is spread all over, it is manifest; it is universal. If you establish in the vital breath as ‘I am’, that in itself will get you there. Don’t be dishonest to your vital breath, worship it, and when you do so, it can lead you anywhere, to any heights – this is the quintessence of my talks. In such simplified fashion, nobody has expounded this profound teaching.
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